maybe art trades? idk i need to start drawing more again, does anyone have any OC's or fursona's they'd like me to sketch up? i only wanna do ones that have some type of ref sheet. they might not get done tonight, but over the next few days i'll do them.

I joined one, out of desperation to find a place in the furry community, and they seem to be pretty accepting of trnas/nb/lgbt people...but at the same time they're okay with letting people tell those who are nb that only 2 genders exist........"people are entitled to be what they want or believe, thats the bottom line" is what I was told when i confronted the person. I really don't want to be in a group where they claim to be accepting of everyone in the lgbt community and then they passively allow people in the community to be looked down on so openly. finding good servers is hard.

I was just locked out of my account for like 7 months lmao. but it's fixed now, i'll update links and info and i'll do an art dump soon.

I also re-made my telegram, and tbh i'm looking for some cool discord groups to join so i can be around more artists. If you have, or are part of a cool server pls let me know. i'm lonley and uninspired ;v;

Trying to get back into drawing, and also trying to get back into streaming. It's basically a test stream to see if I've fixed things, I won't be doing requests or commissions. Music will be playing but the mic will be off. https://www.twitch.tv/qhhostie/

About 2 or 3 weeks ago, my grandmother was diagnosed with lung cancer. She was a year away from being 80 and a few months away from celebrating her 60th wedding anniversary. This woman was very cruel and manipulative, and I dare say abusive, but she was still like a second mother to me. She took me in when I was couch hopping and no one wanted me and took care of me in exchange for me taking care of her. She was terribly disabled and her mind was pretty terrible due to a bout of spinal meningitis she had a year before my birth.

She'd already battled with cancer twice before, breast cancer when she was young, and then uterine cancer back in 2015. She didn't do chemo for the latter case due to her age.

Once we moved, her health and strength started leaving her fast, and she'd been diagnosed with pneumonia twice. She never truly recovered, and soon she stopped being able to eat, that's when we found the cancer.

The cancer was very aggressive, and was already covering over half of her lungs and moved to the bone of her lungs. She passed away rather peacefully on the 21st of this month. We held the funeral yesterday, and buried her today about 4 hours away in the same cemetery as her parents and sibling(s).

Things have been hard since we started our move, and i'm terribly depressed as I grieve for her. But tbh, I'm glad she's done fighting and I can finally finish grieving. Watching someone die day after day is taxing and pretty dang traumatic, at least for me it was.

Man, that makes me feel bad.

But anyways, I've been in this little town for almost a year now, how wild is that? I just barely celebrated my one year anniversary with my amazing and beautiful girlfriend. And this hiatus/semi-hiatus has been going for just about as long. about 10 months actually.

I'm trying so hard to draw everyday, but it's difficult. I was recently diagnosed with arthritis, though we still aren't sure what type it is. I work part time, although often I'm working almost 7 days in a row, because my boss found a way to cheat the scheduling system to make that legal. I don't have a comfortable, or less uncomfortable than normal place to draw. I sit in a hard, wooden chair affecting the arthritis in my back terribly, for hours whether I'm gaming or drawing. I have very low energy like 90% of the time and it makes it almost impossible to draw, accompanied with the mental illnesses.

I promise I'll be drawing more. I just know how much more or when I'll be able to draw everyday again. I miss it, so, so much.

If you read this, thank you.

(oh yeah, I forgot, I've started streaming my overwatch games on twitch and sometimes will doodle stream. here's my channel if you wanna check it out!)

So I might be ending this semi hiatus thing soon. I think I've finally began settling into my new environment and I'm trying to work through my art blocks and mental blocks created by my mental illnesses. I've got a good, steady job as a cook, and I'm going to be cross-trained as a server and a driver in the near future, which makes me hope that within a year I'll have a promotion to a manager. That will make my future move to California to be with my partner permanently much easier.

I'm working on getting my license/permit, and I have a car waiting for me and getting fixed in the city with one of my uncles. Our house back in Missouri is finally being sold, which means we'l be moving to a permanent residence soon-ish, and maybe I'll even be able to move out on my own.

I feel very...blessed, I suppose I could say. I don't like using that term because I'm not religious, but I can't find another way to describe it. I feel very lucky, everything is starting to look better and brighter, and I have many people who at least act like they're trying to care and be part of my life after shunning my immediate family for decades.

I really hope that this lasts, and hopefully I'll be able to start drawing regularly.

Well, as of yesterday I am now living in another state! I'm unpacking and being super duper homesick as we speak. This is a really big change, having to go from a large city with over 300,000 people (along with other big towns/cities in the metro area) to a tiny mountain town of 2,000 people (5,000 if you count the bigger town a mile away). I'm using my phone as a hotspot for the time being, until we decide what to do with our internet situation, so I don't know how often I'll be drawing or uploading. I'm still alive, and I hope to doodle quite a bit once we settle.

Also, if anyone has a furvilla, feel free to add me, I'm Xabi, and I named my first villager Xabi as well. I have no idea how to use the site and the forums are intimidating for me right now, but I would love to have some friends there to play with.

tbh I haven't been super active with drawing and everything, but I'll probably get inactive again. I have to go through a sudden move later this month, it's going to happen fast and my family is looking to be out in another state days away by the end of this month or the beginning of this month. Most of what I draw will probably be vent art, it's going to be a scary, sad, and stressful time for me, and I know I'm not good at talking or maintaining friendships, but I appreciate all of you who stick around, even if I don't post often.

Idunno! Everyone else seems to be leaving, at least everyone I follow here. It doesn't help that our passwords were compromised, which has made me a little anxious. So I made a FN! Idunno if i'll use it much, it feels v much like twitter for furries/furry artists and i'm awful at using twitter.

Just a little update on life I suppose! Things have been going alright, although I am once again unemployed.

My job at the craft store fired me/let me go without telling me, and then proceeded to ignore me. And the last job I had only lasted about a week, due to the way things were run. (Lack of training, abusive manager[who wasn't even an official manager] and lack of concern for safety of customers and employees)

This has come at a really bad time, as I've been planning to visit my girlfriend this summer, who lives out in California while I'm in Missouri. It's caused me to consider some things, like trying harder to get commissions. I'm thinking about doing quick pixel commissions like this one here if anyone is interested!

All my other commissions are open as well!

I've finally opened up commissions! Since my work kinda screwed me over and i didn't work at all the first week of this month I will be taking commissions! you can send me a note here or message me on telegram(my username is xabiwhispers) just be sure to look at the commission tab on my profile before messaging me!!! :D

Hey guys!! There’s a new network coming around for Trans Furry artists! We will be on Telegram where you can communicate with other artists, share your art, plan art trades, and plan collabs. You don’t have to draw all furry all the time, even if it’s just once in awhile you’re eligible to join!! If you are interested in joining there will be a post circulating on tumblr under “trans furry artist network”, Just click the like button and reblog the post to help spread the word.

Once we hit 10 or so members the post on tumblr will stop circulating and the journal will be taken off Xabi’s front page of his profile.


Requirements to join the Network:
-To join you must be an artist who at least sometimes draws things of the furry variety
-You must be LGBT+, but we will be prioritizing Trans/NB individuals, since that is who the group is for
-You must ‘like’ the post on tumblr or comment on the Journal on FA
-You cannot be a TERF or have any racist, transphobic, or homophobic beliefs ect (If we find out after you joined you will be kicked out of the group)
-Must be under the age of 25
-Must be over the age of 13
-Must be willing to accept everyone regardless of how they identify, as long as they aren’t crossing any boundries (like a fully white person identifying as two-spirited or using a name from a race they don’t belong to.)

Rules you must be willing to follow when joining the group (rules are subject as time goes on)
-You must not post or link to any NSFW/Pornagraphic artwork, videos, audio,ect
-If you are 18 or older you must not in any way flirt or make advances towards minors
-If the Admins have reason to believe an adult is harassing a minor we will remove the adult in question
-If the Admins have reason to believe and have proof to abuse or harassment we can and will step in and remove the abuser/harasser
-There is not to be any for of hate speech, whether in jest or seriousness
-If you are a witness to any of this, please take screenshots and contact an Admin, either privately or in the group chat about what is happening and we will take care of it
-Only Admins can change the group name and icon
-No Misgendering anyone or invalidating anyone’s identity or self expression. (Also, if you use neopronouns please have aux. pronouns for those whose mental illnesses/disorders make it too difficult to use neopronouns)
**Note for Admins, before taking any permanent actions please get a hold of Xabi and fill him in on what is going on and he will make a decision on what to do

Group Owner: Xabi (@xabiwhispers)
Admin(s): Xabi (@xabiwhispers), Toby (@sparkleseal)
**Admins can be added and removed over time by the Group Owner when Admins join or leave

Alrughty my dear friends, although I doubt many of you will even care to read this. I have a very dear friend who needs some help, and is taking commissions!!  sparkleseal Has such a wonderful style and I've done some art trades with him in the past. He's such a wonderful being to work with and you won't regret buying a commission, especially knowing it's going to help him get clothes and save up for his top surgery! If I had a steady income I would commission him without a hesitation tbh. here's a link to his commission info!!

Also I hope everyone is having a good break/week/day! ^^

Sorry I haven't been updating often, life has kind of gotten in the way.

I recently got a job, I've been there about three......????? weeks now? IDK. Thanks to my friend who got me the reccomendation ;v;

So thanks to that I haven't had a lot of energy to draw, along with the whole being depressed af thing

But! I have the next three days off work, and I'm totally open for some fun art trades, I'm also planning on turning some work doodlles into speedpaints maybe, at least one of them anyways.

Also!!!! My birthday is on Wednesday!! I'm definitely going to hate it and myself lmao(I would love gift art of me and/or some OCs tho, just SAYIN......for a friend............................................) but I'm gonna be 21 and my mom is going to end up dragging me out to some bar to meet some people I don't want to, so, that'll be fun......i guess....

but yeah, that's why I haven't been updating, message me privately if you wanna do an art trade or something!

I'm super excited oh wow, I haven't been this excited about an IM program in a while, but I just got a telegram! It seems super easy to use, and a lot more convenient than skype, at least for me.

If anyone ever wants to or needs to get a hold of me, my telegram username is xabiwhispers, just don't get too inapropriate, or irritated when i use 'text talk' or abbreviated spelling, i do it bc it's easier and i don't like to seem stiff when talking to ppl, also bc im mentally ill and typing is hard when your mind moves 100x faster than your fingers.

Also, if you do message me, pls tell me who you are and how you found me 0:

okay but.....................why do ppl on FA like to try and “rp” in the comment section of my submissions....i dont want that...i want compliments and seeing what ppl like bout my art....my submissions, no my art accounts are not open for rp and i will ignore those comments and try not to chew anyone who does that out. do not boop my nose in my comments on my art. feel free to talk about rps if you want to do one with me in my NOTES. i also have an f-list, which you can ask for, in. my. NOTES. close, irl friends can approach me in my shouts with rp if thy wish to, strangers MAY NOT. ppl i'm not close friends with MAY NOT either. i s2g. if you want to fill me with unbridled rage this is the way to do it.

So I decided to make myself a redbubble to sell prints and products with my art on them!! It's pretty barren right now with only one piece of artwork, since I JUST figured out everything this morning, but I'm working on more pieces as well! Also, I'll be putting a link to it on my profile soon! Click here to see!

i think im gonna open up emergency commissions for the next week and a half, bc i only have five dollars left after getting my drawing tablet and a computer i can actually efficiently use to draw, but i’ll have to open them after the laptop arrives, which should be by wednesday and i need money so i can actually eat on my breaks at work..

does anyone have an invite code i could use? i would love to try the site out, and since i left DA i could use another place to post my art on so i can get noticed. I don't want to work in merchandise forever, i would love to be able to sell prints and stickers and keychains of my own, but i dont have many people looking my way who would be able to buy such things, and i feel the only way for that to happen is to keep posting in as many places as i can.

for those who use to follow me on DA, i deleted there, i dont want to support that disgusting website anymore especially if i feel i’m being looked down on for being a digital artist. i’ve been thinking of using weasyl, are there any other websites i could join? i feel there’s a hole in my heart since DA was my first community and i need to fill this hole with better art sites.

Okay, for those of you who are aware of the family situation concerning my grandmother, she had her surgery today, and she made it through, i'm still not aware of the stage her cancer is in but the doctor is wanting her to start chemo soon. she should be home this saturday, which feels way too soon for how serious this surgery was but insurance companies are assholes.

Work is going okay,it's been stressful getting there and back but this saturday i'm gonna have a play day with 3 of my sisters at the park, of duty, and i'm gonna watch the fireworks!! since i didn't get to see or do any on the fourth thanks to work.

I'm also still working on some art trades, i haven't had the time or energy to work on them thanks to everything that's been going on..

anyways, that's all for me, how are you guys doing?

I'm probably going to be mainly inactive for about a week besides some doodles i might do at work, ive been working every week this week since wednesday and my next days off arent until next friday/saturday/sunday, most of next week thankfully i'm only working midshifts until thurday, but i won't have any time to sit down and really work on anything.

also, my grandma is having surgery on the 16th of this month, i'm probably going be unstable and stressed out between then, they have to find out how to do her hysterectomy and see if the cancer has spread anywhere and i'm really nervous, so i might do some vent art around then but who knows

the first really good thing to happen in a while though is i'm starting to get paid more so i bought myself some books for my spiritual beliefs/practices and a phone case and i also won associate of the month for my area in merchandise !!!! i got a cute rainbow unicorn plushie and named him francis c:

Hey guys !! sorry ive been kinda inactive the past couple/few ?? days, its been a very long and hard week, i had a breakdown sunday night i dont even remember why tho honestly and it made the rest of the week harder for me and then on thursday morning my family found out that my grandmother has uterine cancer. I haven't really had the time to process it since i had to go into work right after we got the call and its made everything a lot more stressful for me, we dont know anything about the cancer yet, but we have an appointment on monday, and i have the next four days off work, so im gonna be spending that time processing everything and probably having another breakdown in the midst of it. im not sure if i will draw anything, if i do it might just be vent art or something to pick me up but i really dont know anything anymore..i feel like i dont have a firm grasp of anything right now, i dont even feel real anymore. but i hope once ive had this break ill be feeling better.

I decided a while back not to open up official commissions, my friend doesnt really want my help and i dont really need the money that badly right now (i mean i would like to start saving up for hormones and stuff but im the worst at saving money rip) but thank you to everyone who gave me the support !