Woo hoo i got a place to live in moving in tomarrow moving in with my best buddy Yoko and mom we got a nice little 4 bedroom so my baby bro has a room baby being 11 lol he's the youngest but yea only thing is its in land caster so it will be hard to see some of my friends like servo Kasbro chi and shadow I'll still try to see ya though!! I'd love to have ya over

But on the off chance things don't work out and I'm unable to get on FA I feel you my friends and watchers deserve to know why I suppose you can toss this aside as a rant journal but here we go!

Basically Eric the guy a called dad and his daughter dicided that they didn't want to live with us anymore after making us uproot our entire life and leave my home town, Eric said that he had "had enough of the bullshit" bull shit like me and my mom paying all his bills his truck payment throwing in rent and changing our way of living to his I mean I couldent even walk outa my room with out being fully dressed and I hate clothes but yea he look at mom and me and said "don't worry I'm not gonna leave you guys stranded you can choose between the birthday presents I said I'd get you or the down payment for a place" wow dude ok my mom spent 500$ to buy your spoiled beat of a daughter an iPod and you never even payed her back but what ever we need a place to live. So he turns into a major asshole shoving it in moms face that he's leaving her and not saying jack shit to me cause I'm pissed and he knows it but anyway he's Ll like I'll help you get into a place you still have this month to find I place I'm renting two rooms right up the road so I'll be there, I helped him pack his gun safe and the safe containing the money he was going to help us out with and he looked me in the eyes and said " ima go put this stuff in storage then I'll be back to help you guys pack, I'll be right back" haven't heard from him since, we got our three day notice yesterday turns out he didn't pay the rent this month and oly payed part of last month so security soaked up the in April last I heard he was moving to Kirkland Washington a place he was planning on moving before we even moved in he sold all his cars the rv everything saying he needed to pay the rent all the while putting the money away to abandon us, so me and mom trying our hardest to find a place, I left everything behind.... Just to get left behind... So yea I might not be on for a bit but I'll try to stay active

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3406695/

all details above good luck!!!!!!!!!

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3396344/

All details can be found at the above link good luck!!

Argh Welp due to crazy shit at the home I might not be able to go, I'm still trying my best but things look dim right now I'm sorry my friends all hope is not yet lost though!!

A great artist is having a free badge raffle check it out here
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3368659/
Good luck!

Shit talk about rain lol anywho i got to meet with a local fur finally and just as ecpected it was osm, welcomed me into his home as if we'd known each other forever XD turns out he knows a bunch of local furs!! which is great because since my move i really havent tryed to meet people out here cause... well... yea most people suck XD but ive only met one fur i didnt like so yea anywho guess this is more of an update and a thank you to kasbro I had a great time hanging out hopefully we can do it again soon!

Its my 21 first Birthday today!!!! so excited!!! I mean im not getting anything i wanted or was promised but lets get real that stuff doesn't matter all that matters is I CAN BUY MY OWN BOOZE XP

Hey everyone as some of you know Ill be turning 21 tomorrow !!!! Well for this I will be going to a bar at city walk (assuming you know what that is XD) Id love to meet some furs there, this is extremely short notice i realize but hey whos to say there arnt some Hollywood furs lookin for a good Easter night so The bar opens at 7 but its a good idea to get there early to get in line Parking is 10-15$ and the cover charge for the bar is 10$ its buy one get the next two free on drinks!!! ill be hopefully getting there at 6 but yea So cal furs if your near there id love to see you leave a comment if you gonna try if there's no way or if ya just wanna say hi!!!!

All the details can be found here good luck!!

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3323072/

Today I'll be doing a couple of things, Two of these things are bad, one is I'm taking a small break from FA during my birthday month I may or may not check in but that's up in the air, the other thing I don't wanna post in a journal because is personal but I'm sure youll all figure it out in due time, with that said I'm sorry to anyone I've hurt and will hurt I know it dosn't make up for any harm ive done but yea sorry...

Hahaha i found a local fur, don't know why im posting a journal about it but yea its osm!! my little sis was all like why are you so happy just cause you met another fur? im like dude furrys are straight up the nicest people you can meet for the most part then she looks at me and goes i thought the nicest people were at church and i couldent help but bust up! anywho gotta go to work now good luck today every body!!

---

fill dis shit out mein

---

~What if?~
● I died:
● I kissed you:
● I fell:
● I lived next door to you:
● I showed up at your house unexpectedly:
● I stole something:
● I was murdered:
● I cried:
● I asked you to marry me:
● I was hospitalized:

~What do you think about my~
● Personality:
● Eyes:
● Hair:
● Family:
● Smile:

~Would you~
● Trust me enough to sleep in the same bed as me?
● Keep a secret if i told you one?
● Hold my hand?
● Study with me?
● Cook for me?
● Love me?
● Date me?

~Have you ever ~
● Lied to make me feel better?
● Wanted to kiss me?
● Wanted to kill me?
● Broken my heart?
● Thought I was unbearably annoying?
● Hated me?
● Wanted to tell me something but didn't?
● Wondered about my sanity?
● Wanted to do something to me?

~More ~
● When and how did we meet?
● Describe me in three words.
● What was your first impression of me?
● What do you think of me now?
● What reminds you of me?
● Could you see us together forever?
● When's the last time you saw me?
● Are you gonna re-post this to see what I say about you?

heya guys frist off thanks for teh arts!!! second i want to ask if i could repost artwork of me on my page I will of course give all credit earned to the artist but yea i was wondering if that would be ok probly wont do it for another day or two though

like wow what a subject right?! it's strange to see how a fur can devolpe there art and make it big ya know, but as there fame rises we see that most(not all) of them lose that... mmm idk how to put it, connection with there fans yea thats a good way to put it!! ok ok so we all know that the avrage pop fur gets like 100 notes and shouts a day so its understandable that they can't respond to them all but do you ever feel they just stop trying alltogether? I do, it really sucks but since coming here to FA ive been rather disappointed, half the artist's ive followed for years won't even respond (once more understandable) now this would be fine and dandy if it wernt for the pop furs that make a point to try to talk and comment back with there fans, for example I've followed both red rusker and insomiac overlord for quite some time ( yes i realize they do mostly porn art moving on) and both of these artists have made a point to respond to as much messages as they can i mean my heart jumped outa my chest when insomiacoverloard responded to a comment i made it was like " wow someone who gives a crap about there fan base" then there are furs like..... well im not saying any names here but yea THOSE FURS, its like yea i get that you cant respond to every comment you recive but do you even try anymore? have the fans you once coveted become nothing more than a bother to you? Now I in no way shape or form take any of this personally this is just an analization but its hard to say you loves someones art when there character comes into question, its like yea your art is amizing and i respect you for the talent you've taken your time to master but if at the end of the day your an asshole thats all i really notice its like if jesus was like like " I can walk on water bitch i dont gotta listen to you pray at me!", I guess what im getting at is there are tons of amazing artists out there who are at heart friendly people who don't get nearly enough attention for there work, but these artists who have become pop furs seem to forget what got them there, yes there talent had a part in it but its the fans who give you strengh because without them you'd be just another face among the crowd...... hmmm that felt pretty good i suppose ill think up another topic after im done cleaning im home alone all day today so yea!

See here for detailes
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3189806/

Ive calmed down from that vent journal i posted, Called Xbox support AGAIN, the resubed my report and said within the next week the problem should be resovled and that id be compansated for the time ive lost, xbox support people are really good at there jobs so its hard to get mad at them personally plus its not really fair, Im doing something for elli for valentines day I hope she likes it, god i was a dick to her this morning i feel so bad... but I love her and she loves me and at the end of the day thats what counts, and did i read right? is FA down on valentines day? hope not anywho im sorry for the vent stuff, sometimes ya just gotta let it all out haha, SHIT this means i wont be able to play xbox with elli for a whole week!!! grrr that sucks but i digress, I want to thank all my watchers all my friends i havent posted anything is such a long while im going to try to do some hiking soon and get some pics of the desert, OH and my buddy finally ordered my light casings he even payed the differnce (cause when i gave him the money they were on sale for almost half price 4$ vs 7$ so yea at least when they get here ill be able to glove and i might upload some of that! anywho THANKS TO ALL MY WATCHERS AND FRIENDS!!!!!!!! Id also like to put out there that im a very friendly guy so feel free to talk ta me about anything OH OH I know here

Zer0 Sanguine << skype me it says im in simi valley thats me

DUDE omfg i get woken up this morning to do what?? to clean up a mess because a fucking fish tank broke, let me be the first to say I HATE FISH, what a fucking usless pet a fucking living decoration not to mention some of the lil fuckers cost an assload of money oh yea 300$ for something that will die in a week FUCK!!!! MOVING ON!!! like i was saying i had to vaccum up a shit load of water and dad runs off to buy her a new tank its not like he owes me 40$ and mom 300$!!!! but no the spoiled little shit needs a new tank Man i tell ya if i had it made like her id be a shit ton more humble I MEAN REALLY I WANT TO SNAP A 12 YEAR OLDS NECK! that kinda shit isnt heathly you know, I've always said id never hurt a kid because of what i went through but if anyone needs an ass beating its this one, FUCK IM SO PISSED OFF, my Xbox live still isnt back, and guess what! i cant get on the site to request a call all my info is old so i can't just call myself my refrance number is gone so even if i could call it would be a huge hassle im so fucking done!!! day's like these are what i call H days Homicide days cause thats all i want to do!!! i mean come on and dad is sitting there blowing smoke up my ass like he was some kinda rimjob chain smoker! "oh thanks so much i really appri-blah blah blah" he tells me ill get exatly what i want for my bday then turns around and tells me I HAVE TO PAY FOR MOST OF IT!!!!! Mom won't let me send elli her money until the bills are payed EVEN THOUGH I KNOW I HAVE MORE THAN ENOUGH TO PAY MY FUCKING BILLS, I can't listen to any of my music cause it gives my parents a headache, Im gonna admit most of these issues could be ignored if i just had the room i want but the spoiled one gets it I GAVE UP FUCKING EVERYTHING TO COME OUT HERE, ya know the only thing she gave up??? HER CHORES!!!!!!!!!!! me and mom do all the fucking work around here while she sits on her ass!!"but shes only 12" says dad FUCK THAT old enough to talk back old enough to do chores I LIVE WITH A SPOILED BRAT WHO IS A CONSTANT BITCH A DAD WHO ONLY CARES ABOUT SAID SPOILED BRAT AND A MOM WHO I DON'T EVEN GET TO TALK TO ANYMORE UNLESS ITS ABOUT SOME OL BULLSHIT!!!!!!! needless to say...... im pissed off

I think it might be slightly different for me, being bipolar my life is basically split into two states a manic and a depressive, now most of the time I'm in my manic state where my hallucinations are mostly audio like hearing voices n shit but in this high energy state it's easy to ignore and stay on the bright side cause my mind won't stay on the same subject for very long thus making its simple to focus on other things and stay happy, when I go into a drepessive state my hullcations are much more visual basicly it's like falling into a dream kinda like sleep walking, hmmm well yea like ya know when your so tired you just keep falling asleep and as your head falls you snap it back up in an attempt to stay awake knowing that your sleeping very soon well it's a lot like that your kinda aware of what's going on and you shut your eyes for what feels like a second and BAM it's morning and your like "the fuck?" it's a lot like that most of the time when I hullcenate I don't really SEE that much crazy stuff in just kinda not there like.... Well yea you get it anywho even in these depressed states I can still be quite happy I just can't phiscally show it, I'm very monotone and wear a blank face though I could be very happy I'm just unable to show it in that state. Im not sure why I wrote this out right now of all times Probly cause I'm in my depressive state at the moment and if I seem distant or anything it's not cause I'm mad at anyone or anything I just don't have the energy to express myself so yea there's another fun fact about me anywho give me some feedback feel free to ask questions n all that love you guys and love you Elli!!!!

Gets really hard when your powerless a 12 year old runs my house hold be cause "she was here first" yet he has pics of me when I was a toddler with him at a theme park soooo? I really hate to write this type of journal and for the record my life is great I have a roof over my head and food in my fridge as well as money to take care my snakes, I just wish I had more say than what cleaner to use on the floors, but I don't even.

Ill be writing a journal on this very soon

OMG Elli gave me her facebook and i found some pics of her as a toddler OMFG SHES SOOO CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! who wants a link;D

Honestly i have no idfea what to write ima talkin to elli!!!!!!!

That strange moment where you momentarily slip through the folds of reality and into limbo that spot on the edge of sanity and insanity. Yes it starts as A minor hallucination but then suddenly it takes hold a heavy pressure on your chest... Fear you fall back out of your body down down down like Alice falling through the rabbit hole but your destination isn't wonderland its a nightmare world. Now at first you fight but you quickly find your self fautiged as if zapped of your energy then the darkness sets in as you watch the world you once knew fades to black and suddenly color snaps back and your not where you once were some how it's peaceful here in this new place, it feels as though your weightless, floating. But as the darkness clears and your view returns yOu notice your not in a place of peace but pain. Demonic figures torture incocent people parents being torn from there kids and ripped apart right Infront of them, the screams of the children which would normally upset you sound like music to your ears the smell of death and burning bodies fills your nose a smell that woul make most cringe and vomit Dosnt bug you at all as the children's limbs are ripped of and tossed through the air the feeling of blood falling like rain on your skin is like exstacy so warm so welcoming you can't help but have just a taste.... As you bring the blood to your tongue your snapped back into your body as if your were attached to a bungie cord as you return to reality you realize the gravity of what you just saw and how it made you feel anyone else would be frightened but not you in fact, you want to find a way back don't you??? This is madness my friends and it lives within us all trying to get out it comes in many forms and is known by many names but yes madness it's truly beautiful is it not?