If you want me to write something for you, ask, because I really want the practice. Really anything.

***It can't be pornographic unless it's a parody of pornography, in which case I'll happily do it.***

My writing ethic is kind of like Phillip K. Dick's. If it doesn't need to be said, I won't say it and I'm not going to ever be horribly redundant. I like to leave things open ended as far as descriptions go. You won't receive sprawling manuscripts about stuff. The furthest I've ever gone with something was 40 ppb pages or 10,000~ words.

I think the most stand-out concept that Gattaca dealt with that kind of made the movie for me was the process of becoming another person in order to be validated as a human being. That idea haunts me. The social engineering and the lies to achieve what ultimately all people strive for in their lives: a purpose.
https://youtu.be/00x6uqY555Q

I'm drawing crayon porn
Taking some really whacky crayon porn requests.

well I've learned a lot.

http://images.4channel.org/f/src/Ho.....awYiffyArt.swf

Where are you staying?
I forget.

What day are you getting there?
Frithdey naecta or satherdey mroninga.

Who will you be with?
Dr. Chim Richalds
Pr. Dick Stronghold
and like one other person but I don't know her FA.

Who will you hang out with during the convention?
Same people above as well as some other people like and such.

Are there any panels you might be attending?
No cause that'd be gay and I'm obviously not gay.

Will you be suiting?
Maybe, maybe not

Do you do free art?
If you like web art collages.

Do you do trades?
If you like web art collages

Do you do badges?
If you really fucking like laminated web art collages of dogs and Seinfeld.

Do you do commissions?
If you would like to pay me for badly cropped images atop the faces of children.

What is your gender?
Mailman

How tall are you?
5'11"

Are you taken? Are you looking for a 'mate'?
I'm not taken, but I'm not particularly looking. I'm more interested in befriending people.

Can I talk to you?
So long as you're a civil person and not heavily autistic.

Can I touch you?
Only if I know you well.

How can I find you?
I may or may not be the fellow with the dinosaur mask or the Jedi costume.

Can I visit your room?
It's obviously not going to be attached to the event thing.

Can I buy you drinks?
I don't really drink alcohol.

Can I give you stuff?
as long as it isn't a dildo or your virginity.

Can I hug or snuggle with you?
Don't be a creeper.

Are you nice?
Depends on who you ask. I perceive myself to be very critical but also very passive. I am also really good at lying through my teeth.

How long are you going?
Frithdey os Sondey

Do you have an artist table?
Nah man

Will you be going to parties?
I'm not a party animal.

Will you be performing?
I really want to find a piano to play and maybe sing on, but probably just play.

If I see you, how should I get your attention?
Call out to me. If you can't grasp the pronunciation of my screenname, just call me Ian.

Where will you be most of the time during the day/s?
At the places with the cons and stuff or something.

What/where will you be eating?
Places.

Can I come with you for food/fun/etc?
Ask me.

Can I look in your sketchbook?
I don't do traditional art or art for that matter

Can I draw in your sketchbook?
I don't have one.

Can I take your picture?
Maybe?

What's your goal(s) for the con this year?
To not be a douchemaster26 and maybe make some friends for a change.

This is an idea I was toying with. It's a novella about a couple who get into a car crash while arguing about the Husband's fidelity. The husband wakes up in the middle of the interstate to find that all the cars have disappeared and that his wife is dead. After panicking, he makes a short trip to the city and finds that it too is not only deserted and that plant life has turned it into a sort of literal concrete jungle. Someone is communicating to him with elaborate and noticeable graffiti and he gets calls over payphones from his wife, who is still alive but in an alternate version of the same reality that he's in. The vandal who communicates with the husband gives him instructions on how he could go about getting back to his own reality and how he can save his wife before these mirror realities crumble away.

Also, I finished a short story that I'll be editing and posting shortly once I find the time.

Saw them live yesterday and they were great. I think I love Luke Temple's voice a lot.

Yes it does.

I'm starting to finally feel like I'm becoming decent at piano composition. My songs are starting to not sound all the same and my fingers really know what they're doing.
I've come up with like 5 or 6 different song concepts over the past month or so and I've also completed my first song after two years of composing on the piano. So like, my creativity is really starting to spread its wings or something.

Also, I've recently started listening to new age music a lot and my music is starting to go into that sort of direction and like, my music isn't all melodramatic, depressing, and lonely anymore. It's refreshing. I'm going to eventually go and try to buy a midi cable for my piano. I've been lazy about that for like a year now. But I'll do it. I've decided that I want to be Vangelis Jr.

Fuck gays

Kind of told I'd plug this and then got really lazy about it or something.


Also, fuck you Elub.

stoma sex

Yeah, I'm totally just drowning in writing now. I've reached enlightenment and now it just flows out of me. So you will see the heavily unrefined versions of chapters of a prospective novel popping up a lot on my page. Please critique. I do go back and critique them to make them flow better and for them to be more refined, but I still need you kiddies. So read my badly written shit (if you desire) and let's try to make a baby.

In other news: dicks are what's hot.

"How To Not Be A Worthless Piece of Shit" panel



Also, being stuck at a furry con without power is terrifying. Furries are terrifying. I was terrified. You guys are terrifying.

Me and my buddy  musicpaws are heading off to MFM last minute on friday and we totally need a room. We totally don't mind sleeping on the floor or wherever is manageable. But yeah. Contact me or him asap if you're interested in sharing rooms with us.

Well, I'm finally working on a novel. I can't say too much about other than that it takes place in an iteration of Bardo called the Fold, which is essentially an infinite, corporeal band of light winding about the cosmos like a desolate rural highway. So basically, the main character is dead and is in a state of spiritual intermediacy prior to inevitable reincarnation.

I can't say much without revealing the plot, but what I can say is that it has been in my head as an idea since the 12th grade. I even wrote a first and part of a second draft about a year ago, though the story concept has evolved somewhat since that time into probably the most depressing story idea I have ever had in my life. It's taken my about a year, but I've mentally outlined the whole plot at this point in time and I'm ready to start writing. Prepare to maybe or maybe not see rough, unedited chapters or clusters of chapters appear on my page.

Arfbound is my favorite video game you guys, like super seriously.

I talk like a valley girl in english and spanish.

So like Car Seat Headrest's new album just came out. I want for everyone who enjoys his stuff to know and to those not in the know, they should be in the know. http://carseatheadrest.bandcamp.com.....lbum/monomania


Fuck gays, don't let them get married.

I got my first badge and met some people who I obviously did not know previously. Went with and we caused some sorts of chaos or other. We also agreed upon making a critical comic about the furry fandom which is something good. Fuck gays, don't let them get married. Uh, also I got my first and second badges of Terry Disco, so suck a dick spick. And now I'm home and in my room and probably masturbating furiously to doctored and rather obscene pictures of your favorite hollywood actresses.

https://youtu.be/ycQNfnhINz4

I'm sorry Calvin. I still love you.

We're watching The Wiz in 's stream
http://www.livestream.com/PotluckButts
Be there or be rectangle

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/8296019/

 Clydey is Roadkill.

You'll have to manually zoom in to read the comments, but it's worth it, gurl.

I pronounce lingerie wrong.
https://youtu.be/GBsAXfTBL-c

Seriously guys, there are lots more people who have been on this site longer than I have who deserve more watches. But nah, I love you guys like a bonobo loves to fuck and that is a statement conjured up from the deepest recesses of my body system.

Don't let them get married.

I did a voice in it
https://youtu.be/J97dbjjKxbs

Stolen from

This is a really long 80+ question meme that I did while I was bored, but it has a lot of info about me that you might want to read on the off-chance that you want to stick your dick in my spick rectum. And even if not, it tells a lot about how I work so that might be a thing or something. I dunno.

Basically I answered quite honestly and was really tacky doing it. Don't read it.

FUCK GAYS DON'T LET THEM GET MARRIED

1. Are looks important in a relationship?
Not so much(seeing that I myself am a Puerto Rican Caveman), but they're a factor.

2. Are relationships ever worth it?
I've only had one that lasted like I day because I terminated it, so I have no idea. They seem worth it if you're in love and aren't constantly at odds with each other for arbitrary things like my old roommate was with his lady friend.

3. Are you a virgin?
At the current time, yes.

4. Are you in a relationship?
Nah, mang.

5. Are you in love?
I'm not in love because I'm not in a relationship. I like some people though.

6. Are you single this year?
What does this mean?

7. Can you commit to one person?
If they want me too, but I'm open to open relationships mostly because it takes a lot to make me jealous of people.

8. Describe your crush
I've got a few. I don't want to describe them though, but they're sweet people.

9. Describe your perfect mate
Never use mate in this context, fool. But someone who's really sweet and who gets me on a level that most of my friends don't quite get. I don't want to be in a relationship to have sex, I just want to be in a relationship to be in love with who a person is and for them to likewise be in love with me for the same reasons. Ohmgosh I feel like a Lifetime TV movie

10. Do you believe in love at first sight?
I don't believe in falling in love with someone without trying, but I do believe in wanting to put your dick in someone's arse at first sight.

11. Do you ever want to get married?
I don't need to be married to be happy, but you know, there's some perks to it.

12. Do you forgive betrayal?
A little too much. I'm practically a pushover when it comes to being betrayed. This behavior probably came from my mom. I'm totally non-confrontational in most regards.

13. Do you get jealous easily?
Like I said before, I don't. If I'm in a monogamous relationship and the guy or gal ends up screwing some other guy or gal, I might be disappointed, hell maybe really disappointed, but I usually don't get jealous of little things like my hypothetical boyfriend or girlfriend looking at someone else's ass and dumb shit like that, y'know?


14. Do you have a crush on anyone?
A few.

15. Do you have any piercings?
No. And I hate everything but normal earrings and maybe small gauges. I dislike it when people go out of control with gauges.

16. Do you have any tattoos?
I totally want one, but I'm too fookin' frightened of the pain. I'm wholly, totally averse to any sort of physical pain.

17. Do you like kissing in public?
I haven't kissed in front of other people, but it doesn't bother me. So longs as it isn't all out with tongue and shuddering and all of that.

20. Do you shower every day?
For the most part. My hairs tends to not acknowledge this.

21. Do you think someone has feelings for you?
I know of a few. I'm sure a few more do too.

22. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?
Eh?

23. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?
If I fuck another guy, I'm probably going to tell you(bf/gf) beforehand. I think I more prone to fucking guys than I am to fuck girls.

24. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?
No.

25. Do you want to be in a relationship this year?
It'd be sweller than knots.

26. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?
No.

27. Has someone ever written a song or poem for you?
No.

28. Have you ever been cheated on?
No.

29. Have you ever cheated on someone?
No.

30. Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, what would you change about your body?
Not Plastic surgery. But I'm gonna be honest, I'm going to have to have a breast reduction because my moobs(let me talk to you about them) will never disappear no matter how much I work out. It's a genetic thing from my dad's side and he fuckin' had to get them removed like 5 years ago. Didn't stop him from scoring with the ladies beforehand though.

What do you know about these manboobs?

I have very little shame but still some.

31. Have you ever cried over a guy/girl?
No.

32. Have you ever experienced unrequited love?
Yes, yes I have.

33. Have you ever had sex with a man?
Haven't had sex, mija.

34. Have you ever had sex with a woman?
Haven't had sex, caballero.

35. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?
Older by like three months.

36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends?
A little.

37. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?
I don't think so.

38. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?
I think so, yeah.

39. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?
I've felt those kinds of feelings in fragments, but not full strength.

40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone?
No.

41. Have you had sex so far this year?
No.

42. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander?
I don't know that.

43. How long was your longest relationship?
2 days.

44. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had?
One boyfriend.

45. How many people did you kiss in 2011?
None. But I kissed someone this year.

46. How many times did you have sex last year?
None.

47. How old are you?
19

48. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?
I support them in their endeavors and while I might jealous at a microscopic level I am happy for them, mostly because I am pretty aware and respectful of other people's feelings and ambitions. This happened not too long ago with a girl I really, really liked like dear gosh. I even wrote this really long thing on facebook talking about how much I liked her because I'm creepy and tacky at the same time. I like to see that people are happy.

49. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her?
n/a

50. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?
I'd accept desu

51. Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for?
Maybe

52. Is there anyone you’ve given up on? Why?
Yes.

53. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?
No. Not that I can think of. But I'm not really doing any of those things so far as I know.

54. Is there someone you will never forget?
I don't forget people easily.

55. Share a relationship story.
One time, I fucked this girl in The Witcher and then I was rewarded with a digital trading card.

56. State 8 facts about your body
1. Average height
2. I weigh in the late 160s to low 170s.
3. I have a beard(most of the time)
4. I've got a dick.
5. My elbows are sometimes red from tecktoniking
6. I am a Spirish(Spanish Irish)
7. I have too much hair on my arms and legs.
8. I'm like the text-book definition of skinny-fat, but I'm working on it. I look fine in most clothes and my bmi is average, but I'm terrified of taking off my shirt around others.

57. Things you want to say to an ex
I'm still good friends with my ex. I'd try to make every break up amicable if possible.

58. What are five ways to win your heart?
1. Be sweet and mentally sound for the most part
2. Have relatively similar interests
3. Like music and like to make music
4. Not be a slob
5. Be altruistic

59. What do you look like? (Post a picture!)
Look at how fucking tacky I look. I have DSLs.
I hate pictures of myself, oh dear god I can't smile.
Phantom of the okra


60. What is the biggest age difference between you and any of your partners?
I don't have a partner.

61. What is the first thing you notice in someone?
The way they sound when they talk.

62. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you?
I seriously don't know what turns me on.

63. What is your definition of “having sex”?
Having someone do something to your dick or you doing something with your dick to someone. So someone cutting off your dick is sex. And having someone punch you in the dingus is sex. No. when you're a guy for the most part(because girls are too fucking difficult) it's when you shoot clue glue because someone made you shoot clue glue.

64. What is your definition of cheating?
Getting into a romantic relationship or a sexual relationship with someone else without me knowing.

65. What is your favourite foreplay routine?
I honestly don't know, you Brit.

66. What is your favorite roleplay?
I don't care for roleplay.

67. What is your idea of the perfect date?
Hanging out and doing stupid stuff on the internet.

68. What is your sexual orientation?
Bisexual. I'm more sexually inclined towards guys, but I am like equally romantically attracted to both sexes. I'm kind of all over the spectrum depending on my mood and what's going on in my life.

69. What turns you off?
Every alternative fetish known to man except for a few and only when those few aren't concentrated.

70. What turns you on?
Penises and vaginas

71. What was your kinkiest wet dream?
I get ghost handjobs when I don't masturbate for long periods of time, but I don't have sex-related dreams to go along with them.

72. What words do you like to hear during sex?
Oh yessssth

73. What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you?
Write me a song. But only if they were in a relationship with me already.

74. What’s the most superficial characteristic you notice?
facial hair or no facial hair.

75. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you?
Take the time to get to know me.

76. What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone?
Take the time to get to know them.

77. What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships?
Eh. Don't be 20 years older than your partner or vice versa

78. What’s your dirtiest secret?
I don't have dirty secrets, but I have secrets.

79. When was the last time you felt jealous? Why?
I dunno and I dunno.

80. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?
Like 7th grade.

81. Who are five people you find attractive?
Michael Fassbender, Jake Gyllenhaal, Anton Sevidov(Tesla Boy), Natalie Portman, Brit Marling

82. Who is the last person you hugged?
A family friend

83. Who was your first kiss with?
My first boyfriend.

I was terrified and I was very awkward.

84. Why did your last relationship fail?
Because I didn't really love him.

85. Would you ever date someone off of the Internet?
I think this question is stupid because it implies that furries dating furries offline is something that doesn't happen. But yeah I'd date someone offline if they were interesting enough. I haven't found someone like that yet though, so I don't focus my attention on people from my own town. But if I do like someone online a lot and end up with them, I'd intend to actually meet with them face to face as soon as possible and live with them if it got to that point. Or have them live with me.