Hello, everyfur,

Welp, my Christmas is kinda ruined this year, and so is January. While visiting family in Indiana, I fell down some stairs and broke my right ankle. So, for the next two months, I'm on crutches. Since my hubby can't do much with his bad back and the Christmas decorations are in storage above the garage where you can only get to them with a ladder, I won't be able to decorate. I also won't be healed enough to make FurtherConfusion in January, so I had to cancel my reservations there.

To be specific on the break, I snapped the fibula bone near the ankle. The good news (I guess) is that the fibula is much less weight-bearing than the tibula, so I am hoping that will make it more likely I could maybe get a walking cast in a few weeks and not be so hampered. I also ordered a hands-free crutch that should arrive in a couple of days. Regular crutches make it impossible for me to do anything, so I am hoping this works out.

The good news is that I did win the drawing for the BLFC hotel room, and by May I certainly hope to be pretty well healed, so I anticipate going there this year.

Poor Michael had to drive me all the way home from Indiana (2,000 miles), but we made it back yesterday. I am trying to keep my foot up and relax. Orthopedic appointment on Friday.

Hope y'all have a much better Christmas than me!

Hugs!
Grubbs Grizzly

Is there a social media site other than Facebook where I can find a lot of furries? I mean, other than FA, SoFurry, and others created specifically for furries. Thanks for your advice!

Hi!

Well, for the first time I wound up in Facebook jail today. I am banned from posting for 24 hours. Why? Using the term "dumb fuck whitey." LOL

I have uploaded the video of our Las Vegas wedding at The Little Church of the West in Las Vegas.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8hWHMimeD0&feature=youtu.be

The updated announcement of the 2019 Good Furry Award Winners is now up

http://www.askpapabear.com/good-furry-award.html

The Winners of The Good Furry Award have just been announced! http://www.askpapabear.com/good-furry-award.html

Hi,

I Need to contact Tony Barrett's next of kin ASAP. Does anyone know whom to contact and how?

Thanks!
Grubbs

Voting for The Good Furry Award has commenced! http://www.askpapabear.com/vote-now

Voting for The Good Furry Award begins May 1! http://www.askpapabear.com/good-furry-nominees

Here are the latest nominations. You can still nominate people through May! http://www.askpapabear.com/good-furry-nominees

Update: Yes, now he really is dead.



I have been misled. Apparently, he did not die and is alive and fine. I am sorry to mislead and pissed at the person who told me he was dead.

Sad news. Dogbomb (Tony Barrett) has passed away. He had ALS and decided to take matters into his own hand rather than let ALS have all the power. Dogbomb was a positive force in the furry fandom, someone who had the right idea about what furries should be. And he was an all-around nice guy. I am sad at his passing....

Is anyone out there playing around with the World of Furries game? If so, is it fun? Is it good? Is it worthwhile?

The angst that imbues the human condition is a symptom of the desire for stasis versus the reality that the fundamental nature of existence is change. All of us will, at some point, grieve for lost loved ones. This is an example of the yearning for stasis, which cannot permanently exist in a changing reality--it is, as the Germans say, a kind of Weltschmerz. We are caught in a condition in which we want our past lives (including our deceased loved ones) to return to the way they were at the same time we intellectually understand that this cannot ever be. The only way to rise above and survive this grief for the past is to recognize that the death of a loved one is just one of many types of change we will experience and that change is inevitable. It is a change we will all, one day, discover first hand.

What does this mean? It means that death is real and that the person in the form they once had no longer exists. BUT! It also means that they exist in ANOTHER STATE, another form, perhaps even multiple or higher forms. It also, in my opinion, means that when we die we are not going to be reunited with our loved ones in the same form that they once had and in the same form that we once had. We will be different and they will be different, but we will all BE. And this is okay. Because stasis--absolute stasis--would be the real death. Life is about change, about evolving, about discovering. You are only really dead if you never change. It is okay that people die. It is okay that you and I will die. It is one step--albeit a very profound one--in the course of being truly alive--not in the biological sense but in the spiritual sense of true being.

Hi!

I have updated the form to nominate a Good Furry http://www.askpapabear.com/good-furry-award.html to make it MUCH simpler. I think I was scaring off people.

Check it out! Nominate!

Hugs,
Grubbs

I am still accepting nominations for The Good Furry Award. The winner gets $1,000 and a handsome trophy.

Please send me your submissions! http://www.askpapabear.com/good-furry-award.html

So, today I was attacked repeatedly by a furry named Diamond Man because I showed support for FC's policies about membership and not allowing people to the con who have been convicted of sex crimes. Here's the article and its comments...

https://www.flayrah.com/7525/furthe.....datory-history

I know I was stupid to allow myself to get sucked into this trolling, but I confess I did it anyway. I guess I am posting this here now because, well, it just makes me feel awful. Am I in the wrong here? Am I truly an awful person? If so, if people really think that, then there is no longer any reason for me to be participating in the fandom.

Here are the latest nominations

http://www.askpapabear.com/good-fur.....r-october-2018

A little preview of the publishing venture I hope to launch in 2019, with The Furry Book being the flagship book, but hoping more to come.

https://unclebearpublishing.weebly.com/

I'm seeing more and more posts of disgruntled furries complaining about the current climate of the fandom--apparently caused by upset on two sides of the spectrum: one side calling themselves Nazi furs and the other side being altfurs. Even though most furries seem to acknowledge that these drama queens and trolls are a minority in the fandom, like most bad apples, they seem to be spoiling the bunch.

I'm inclined to remind furries that we've gone through such a crisis before. It was the Burned Furs versus Frozen Furs debate in which some furries were all upset about furporn and the other side were saying that furporn was fine. You know what happened after a slew of acerbic journals, posts, and tirades? Nothing. It all faded away and things went back to normal. In fact, younger furs have never heard of this whole issue at all.

So, now we have Nazi furs and altfurs and Confederate flag waving furs and social justice warrior furs blah blah blah.

Why? Well, the political climate in the USA currently sucks, and this negative climate of hate has seeped into the fandom. But the whole point of the furry fandom is supposed to be this: let's escape for awhile from the stupidity of the mundane world and have some fun with furry fantasy. Those who turn it all into politics are therefore missing the point of the fandom entirely.

This too shall pass.

I will always be a furry. I don't let other people's bad behavior determine who I am or what I believe.

I hope you won't, either.

Bear Hugs

You know this as much as I do....

Politicians lie to you
Religions lie to you
Society lies to you
Parents and family lie to you (not because they try to, but because they themselves have bought into all the lies)

Why do they do this? Because they want us all to be good little cogs in the machinery, to behave ourselves, not rock the boat, but most of all to not discover the truth because then they lose their power over you.

The truth is more simple than you may realize.

You don't need others to tell you what to believe or how to behave. You already know. You just have to listen. Everyone has a direct pathway to what we call God because all of us are a part of God. We are all God. You don't need an Intermediary. Just you.

Don't try to be what society, family, those in power say you should be.

Be who you truly are and you will find peace.

Be brave and you can do it.

Hugs to all of you.

Grubbs

It's been a very rough few days. First, as in the earlier post, Mom died. Now Michael (my fiance) fell and broke his wrist while visiting friends in Vegas. So, I have to drop everything, rent a car, and go pick him up and then will be his nurse for the next 6 weeks until he heals. Well, I am there for him; that is not the problem. Hope next month is better....

Hi, Furiends,

Letting everyone know that my mother, Patricia Miriam Hile, passed away in her sleep this morning.

It was not unexpected. She has been slowly declining for a long time. But, of course, it hurts. I will be okay.

Hugs,
Grubbs

I've gotten a few complaints that the form to nominate furries for The Good Furry Award is too intimidating. Because I ask for contact information, some have even called it doxxing and cyberstalking.

I want to clear things up.

The form at https://www.askpapabear.com/good-furry-award.html asks for this information, obviously, so that the winner of the award can receive the prize and the money. Contact information is also asked for so that I can make sure these are real people. This information will in NO WAY be made public. It is for my use only for the award.

I have been informed by a reliable source that the alt-furries were planning a campaign of sending me fake nominees and nominees from within their own group to troll the award, but they backed off their plan when they saw the form and that nominations would not be accepted if I didn't know who was doing the nominating and who the nominees were.

From my point of view, that means I made the right choice.

I only want SERIOUS nominations. This is not a bullshit award. I am investing $1,000 of my own money (as well as advertising money) to try to do something nice for the community. And I get this? Really?

I should be used to it, though. The same thing happened when I started the Ask Papabear column and people were accusing me of being an asshole who just wanted to be a bigshot.

Well, six years later and I think I've proven that Ask Papabear is a sincere effort to help people, and it HAS done so!

It is a sad statement of our community that people are suspicious of those who are trying to be kind to others. Very sad.

I even had some nutjob say they were "reporting me to the international police" for creating this award because it is "fraud" and "larceny."

OMG.

But I will forge ahead. Like my column, the first year or two may be rough going with this award until it can establish itself as legitimate.

In the meantime, if you know someone deserving of this award and feel they are worth your time to complete a form and submit it, I would appreciate your doing so and spreading the word.

Thank you.

Grubbs

Hospice called me today to let me know Mom has stopped eating. It is now only a matter of time. Anywhere from 2 to 10 days, but she is so frail now I'm thinking most likely 2-3 days. If I seem unreachable later this week, you will know why.

They are keeping her on pain med drips to keep her comfortable. I visited her about 2 weeks ago and said my good byes. Mom has been on a slow decline for about 2 years now, including a couple times I thought she was going to die, so I am rather prepared for this emotionally and mentally. While painful and sad, Mom's passing is expected and I don't think I will go off the deep end like I did when Jim died without warning. I will be okay, but will probably be quiet for a little while.

Hugs,
Grubbs

Hi,

I realized recently that I have not been doing any fun furry stuff. Oh, I AM doing furry stuff with my "Ask Papabear" column and working on my Furry Book, but these are not fun per se. Califur didn't happen this year, so I haven't even done any fursuiting this year. I realized that all work and no play is making this bear rather depressed.

I'm a little isolated here in the Coachella Valley. The nearest furry group is Riverside, but really not too convenient at over an hour away. I'd kinda like to do some online gaming, but nothing that would suck up too much of my time. Something where I can don my fursonality of Grubbs Grizzly and just be furry for a while.

Does anyone have a suggestion?

Thanks