Okay, so I've been away from this site a lot longer than I thought. Kinda a lot has happened.

In terms of the WH40k stuff, well, I kinda fell out of love with the game for a variety of reasons. I guess I'm kinda waiting for Sisters of Battle to get plastic models so I can make some Pounceys. I don't play the tabletop game anymore. I also got a lot of exposure to how the new breed of WH40k gamers treat furries and 40k being combined, and that's been a bit of a buzzkill. Basically after Halo and Call of Duty died off, their fans went to WH40k, and somehow they didn't quite understand that everyone in the WH40k universe is evil, so they've been seeing all the atrocities and stuff the Imperium does and thinking that they're paragons of virtue in the WH40k universe, which was extremely confusing for me. Also they don't seem to be able to tell the difference between fanfiction, speculation and canon, and I dunno what the hell that's about.

Also my mom got way, way better at WH40k than I am capable of. My problem is that I play WH40k in a very cinematic way, imagining cool battles with every decision I make. Whereas my mom plays WH40k as a tabletop game. She goes for effective units and loadouts. I go for cool units and loadouts. And I get my butt handed to me, every time. It kinda stopped being fun when I started to lose all the time.

Also been having some personal issues with a relapse of the schizophrenia. Thus far the hallucinations and delusions haven't been too bad and I seem to be keeping a grip on what is real and what is not. The negative symptoms, like lack of hygiene and social isolation are getting pretty rough. I also seem to have lost some of my emotional range - specifically I don't seem to be able to feel love or hate. Got an appointment with a psychiatrist coming up in October or November, hopefully I'll be okay until then.

To finish this journal off, probably you shouldn't expect many upcoming updates. I decided to check in with FA tonight because of unusual circumstances.

Take care, I suppose.