So I’ve made vents about this before but recently it’s been on my mind more and more
And I need to speak it

I’m considering leaving this site and every form of site you might know me on behind for good.

Let me explain before you go crazy

so while this site and others like it have been a source of stress relief and in a way, a kind of therapy for me (it helped my cowardly self to retreat into cyberspace rather than face my real problems) recently I feel as though it no longer is able to.

I won’t deny that I have made many memories on this site…but recently, those memories have turned sour.
The sites aren’t what they used to be

People can’t take jokes

You have to be careful about even things like simple pieces of uploaded work lest you get banned by the hypocritical rules that govern these sites now

Every day I see more and more negativity and less of the things that used to make me happy.

Hell even they haven’t been as fun as they used too especially with how things are going on here….
Recent events, especially a recent one where I was told that all I care about is”is burning bridges and not trying to fix anything” before being blocked have made me evaluate things

And…I’m gonna be Honest
I’m concerned about my health. Both physical and mental.

Recent events have taken more and more of a mental toll on my patience and sanity…and I feel as though I am losing thigns I once held dear to me.

My drive…my friendships….my will to take care of myself…I feel as though those things are slowly slipping away….

And…I am concerned my body is failing me.
Recently I’ve been having more and more health scares that seem to come from nowhere..
And I haven’t the strength to fight them if a major one comes along.

My heart is taking more of a beating than ever before not helped by my recent breakdown… and I have already been warned that another bout of even mild stress…like what happened last month when someone blocked me on a different site….could potentially kill me….

And if I’m brutally honest…I don’t it in my to keep up the pretence that I’m ok
I’m not.

I’m a pathetic asshole who would rather shrivel up and die than face the real world.

So perhaps my time in cyberspace needs to end.

Maybe….maybe I need to end.

I’m not saying the decision is final…but it’s something I need to think about.