I hate silence. I hate being alone with my thoughts. The lack of noise let's my brain get laser focus on on something I don't want it to. It repeats and repeats like a broken record. Replaying the good, the bad, and everything in between.

I need to get back into journalling, but FA was closer than my diary. I'm going to get my thoughts on something if it kills me.

I'm struggling with being upset, angry, happy, and empty all at the same time. Draining myself of any sort of closure for each emotion by darting to the next one.

Maybe I should meditate, or is writing enough? I shouldn't add that to my list of things to overthink about. I don't need more challenges to overcome. I just need to act. I just need to write until the thought process is complete.

Writing is nice for that. You get to basically pop a brain zit you've had bugging you for a week. It relieves the pressure and lets you get in with it.

We're always moving forward. We may not vere in the direction we originally intend, but we move forward. I can overcome this hardship. Writing will be my crutch while I walk this dreaded mile.

Fuck me thats a rough journal for a dude who draws porn as a hobby. It is however well deserved.

Goodnight my dudes.