This might be vent but apart from it is also truth which is really hard for me to type...

I overdosed
I slit my wrist
But why is it that I can't do it?
Why do these tears slide down when I don't want them to?
*sniff* *cry* Why...Why..
Does God have a future for me?
One with love in it? will I ever really feel it for once in my life?

B-but I have friends...who love me and I love them
Y-yet I still feel the pain to die...why?

I guess because life is a painful challenge I'll have to conquer such as my ongoing depression. I've depression for 13 years and every one month I get "episodes" which means I think of suicide. Yet because of my friends on here, I realize I'm not ready yet and someday maybe my special "somepony" will love me for myself only.

I love you guys, I thank you for your support. I will never leave my friends but it's the support that helps .

-Cassi