Woah its been two years and in the two years so much has happened. So honestly i know no one really cares but i figured i would go a head and at least update some things. SO the beginning of 2018 i met a dude named William and he was the man of my dreams. I started working at lowes with my friend from high school and she introduced us and we hit it off so quickly. I honestly could not get enough of this guy. We started seeing each other and i moved in with him around June or July of 2018 and everything changed. He began to point guns on me and started to become someone i didn't know. This guy who i thought was my dream guy was actually a monster. I started to become extremely depressed and he began to notice and would scream at me to get over it. In December he quit his job and i was working mine. Mind you i was semi holding the house down by working non full time with 9 an hour. Every time i would try and get overtime i was yelled at to the point my boss at the time told me just to go home and began to ask my coworkers if i was in a abusive relationship. Later on he talked me into a threesome i did not want be convinced me it would help us and it did not. He began to force me to have sex with me and when i didn't he it started a huge argument. Honestly things were getting so awful and my friends and family were scared for my safety but i just told them i still loved him and he wasn't always this way. He finally got a job in January and he told me everything was going to get better and that this was our year. Well. YOu all can guess what had happened. Well January the threesome thing happened, he became more angry with me for no reason, started to kick his dog out of anger, and he tried to break up with me while he was on his lunch break after he finally got another job but he made me quit mine. Well February rolled around and he started to act odd. William wanted to have kids and we found out i cant have children. Well he began to act strange and started coming home late. One day he didn't answer my calls or texts for four hours then another day he was gone for 12 hours. That same day he was gone for 12 hours he took me out bowling with my friends and that night started a fight with them and then pissed them off enough that they went home and he then had a fight with me because i began to cry. Well on my birthday he bought me a promise ring and in March he cheated on me. I moved out and he threatened to kill himself but in a matter of days like two i think he posted everywhere he was with her. SO that was my 2019. We aren't even gonna go on about how shitty my job was in the health care department of my life. Like dude taking care of people suck not because of the people itself but management. Also me a dude named James in 2019 and we will get to him in a sec. So 2020 rolls around and i am a sad depressed piece of shit then i meet a cool friend named Jay. Honestly has been the only thing good this year is Jay but eve then she and I are rocky. To summarize this year my car went to shit, me and James are not on talking terms because we tried being together again and he was a jackass and brought out the worst in me. found out i had several different mental disorders so fuck mental health, went to a mental hospital, quit my job cause my boss personally attacked me emotionally because we have been friends since high school and she is fucking my brother, now i cant see my godchild/niece due to that reason, and i feel like im not enough. So welcome to my life that is a shit show. I may post art one day again but until that day comes i will stick around but wont be any art. Thanks for reading my ted talk.