So in summary, my parents (specifically dad) felt so frustrated at my life situation that he called to get me a referral to his psychiatrist, or at least someone who's an expert at autism. He claims that ever since he's been on certain meds, he's felt SO MUCH better and how he's been able to be productive around the house.

Idk When I'll see the psychiatrist, I hope it's within two weeks, at least.

Besides the "wasp in my room" issue (which is thankfully sorta taken cared of, at least in terms of the bastards trying to go to my room), the past two or so weeks have been really stressful for me. Things kept happening that kept retriggering and making my rumination worse. Thankfully not to where I was having anxiety/panic attacks but there's been many times I was just....mentally exhausted.

I'm slowly doing better since this Monday. Yesterday, besides a slight tinge of nervousness, I felt pretty good. The rumination has been subsiding over the course of days, but at times I'll still feel moments of sadness or like a "blegh" ceeling,,especially when it's night and/or I need to wind down.

I've been through dealing with anxiety/panic attacks, before. I know it takes time for my body and mind to slowly recover from such stress. It's just....sometimes it can be annoying/frustrating dealing with this.

Last night, I tried getting some sleep ao I can wake up early to hang out with my sister, today. Were gonna see the original '40s Bambi at a local theater, and then I'll be attending her yoga class for free. I do hope today goes well.

My hope is maybe try another medication, like Zoloft. I'm concerned about finding the right med that won't just dull my emotions. I want one that can at least take the edge off or somehow just help. I heard supplements involving GABA could help (at least, l-theanine, some types of magnesium, etc).

I'm sorry if this doesn't do a good job at explaining things, I'm just trying to be careful not to unintentionally ruminate and retrigger any emotions.

I'm sorry for the folks I owe comissions and YCHs. I still need to do a proper finale to the Mamoth Mutt and Renamon growth drives, despite no longer having the exact numbers/exact amount of dollars that were raised.

I really hope I can just feel better.