I really needed to make a new journal, so why not do it now. Life is being really tough right now. Got dumped about a week before my birthday, her immediately sleeping with the guy she had been hanging out with, and then going out with him, which is totally okay, because as she put it, "I removed you on facebook, before changing my relationship status from being with you, to being with him, to keep you from getting hurt, seeing pictures of him and I together, kissing and stuff." Not to mention that when she talks to me about a month after the break up, and we talk on the phone, one of the first hard things going on in her life, that she feels the need to tell me about, is how she had had a pregnancy scare, and had thought she was pregnant for about a month. Think about how long that was since our breakup, and you can see what type of girl she is.

I have also been working at my new job at Publix for about 4 months now, and am fighting to get moved to full time. There are a lot of good people there, but some bad too. I have been working my ass off though, and am at least proud of that.

I am also trying to quit drinking some, outside of occasions and stuffles, as during my time dating Karen, and after the breakup, never before, had I ever drank so much, or so often. With the clinical depression, cutting, and thoughts of suicide being bad enough, I found myself getting drunk every night, often drinking a 750 ml, or greater, sized bottle of vodka or rum in two to three nights. I am surprised how well I was able to hold up, as that is a lot, but I seem to have a high tolerance to it, and outside of feeling a little sick a few times, most likely from being on the verge of needing to get help or something, I was never hungover.

I am trying to better myself, and am hoping I will actually find the girl that must exist out there for me, but for now, I am trying to just be a good puppy, and to slowly heal from everything. To anyone that actually reads all of this, and stuff, please leave a comment or something. It really helps to see that people care. Thank you all for caring about this silly Shiba Fox. <3<3<3