Harroo everyone,

I normally start with me freaking out over how long it's been since I made a journal, so aaaa it's March and my last one was December o.o!

In the time it's been since December, I've been pretty busy with work, getting some school stuff situated (as things got in the way before) and something that I honestly don't know how to deal with.

First thing that's been on my mind for quite a while (and I wanna write it down in a comprehensible way) is on the subject of a fursuit I commissioned from someone last year. To make a long story short, I bought Vincent from the same maker and decided (after being pressured out of getting a commission from someone in the UK) to commission them for a fursuit of my one character, Watson my "skulldog" (his face is patterned like a skull but isn't a skull). I went with this maker because I thought being a returning customer and all, this maker was good for it. Well, I started to pay for this commission on April 29th last year and from then until Megaplex of last year, things went well for the most part; I paid every month until I saw them at Megaplex and they said "it was fine" for me to hold on the last payment and they told me the reason why there was some delay over the summer was because some things happened (will not list those however so yeah). During the summer I was working on Vincent anyway, so it wasn't a big deal to me anywho, plus the commission just started and we already went through swatches over the summer. At Megaplex, someone who also was commissioning this maker asked me if I'd heard anything from the maker as they commissioned them as well and had no communication with them over the summer. I told them the maker had some emergencies over the summer and that they were delayed because of that.

Fast forward to November of last year (skipping over October of last year because it can bite me, one of the worst months ever); my dad pulled up a review on this maker where the customer waited for about 2 1/2 years, made numerous attempts to contact this maker only to be ghosted for months on end and even their last chat log it took from one year to the next year to get a response from this maker. This was when the customer told the maker they would like a refund as their commission wasn't being worked on. Another thing, even after he asked for a refund and got a response back, it still took the maker more time than necessary to refund the customer. This is where I should've said something, but I tried to give them the benefit of the doubt.

Same month, different day I see they posted on their socials "I might have to look for a regular job with how things are going." This caused me to see another red flag and honestly, made me have anxiety. I messaged them after seeing that post asking for a ballpark on when my suit was to be finished and they said "Watson should be complete for a spring release." This fell into their time of when a suit is to be completed (though for context, I must put this in as well; they stated to me they do not do hard deadlines, which is why I asked for a ballpark. However, on their site in one place it said 2-3 months, which then I think changed to 8-12 months, but then they don't do hard deadlines. I would say there's a presumption that the suit should be finished by 12 months or 1 year but we'll get to that). Afterwards, I thought maybe I was just being impatient and forgot that it was a fursuit commission, but then I read that review again and found another of someone stating something similar happening only they actually waited for 3 years, but still I persisted and tried to remain patient.

The last correspondence I would have with this maker in 2024 would be on Nov. 27th and it was on the basis of Watson's head. More Context; the maker after many months of waiting sent 3D renders of Watson's head and what it was gonna look like once it was somehow used to in making the same thing for a soft base. When I first received this, I honestly thought to myself "is that it? no handpaws or feetpaws? Not even a tail?" but I tried to roll with it because maybe they work on those after the head, maybe the tail will be zipped onto the bodysuit. I would receive nothing from this maker from then until February when my mom went mama bear mode and emailed this maker which got the maker to respond to my messages finally (I told my mom not to message her but she wasn't having it, especially since this whole commission has caused me lots of depressive states, panic attacks and trouble sleeping or getting a full nights rest. at that point, my hands were tied).

I would exchange a few messages with this maker in February about my commission and even said "Honestly I was expecting something physical by now, such as handpaws or feetpaws or even a tail." They said the tail is usually worked on with the bodysuit, which I was fine with. They also said they would be working on my feetpaws and handpaws the next week following February 26th. I also neglected to add the purple feet-pawpads to Watsons ref sheet which was a bit of an oopsies moment.

At the time of me writing this, it has been one month since I've received a message, only including the 3D renders of Watsons head and no photos or proof they even worked on my feetpaws or handpaws. I also haven't even gotten a message asking for my DTD which I've had ready for quite a while. It has also been about 11 months so far (will be 11 on March 29th) and I haven't even received anything of substance. I don't know how I should go about this with this maker, other than possibly having to just ask for a refund as I've made the attempts to contact them but they haven't done the same. For more context as well; I've commissioned something else from another maker and ordered socks from Angy Paws and those so far have two things; Angy Paws I've already got a tracking no. and I know where my socks are, AND the other commission has a queue which has been in motion since I've seen it (also I won't say what I commissioned yet from the other maker because it's a surprise).

My honest feeling for this commission now is I honestly feel bitter to get anything from this maker I've been dealing with for almost a year, and they've soured me towards Watson who to me is a character I hold dear to me. I feel discouraged as I feel if I were to do anything it would only be to my deficit, and I feel disappointed. After all, this maker is nice and they made a sona that I now consider personally important and means so much to me, up there with Jeffery, Keter and Jade. But I feel like this has gone on long enough and not having any reliable communication or any updates I can see is just not working. Honestly, I'm looking forward to my next commission which is a long way off (hinted at it in an art I posted recently) and it'll be with a maker I actually really want. That of course being MoreFurLess as they make really nice suits. Anyway, that's been a major weight on my mind and shoulders as of late. I'm really hoping things turn for the better soon (whether it be I get my money back or ideally, they would just say they can't do it and give me my money back but I'm pretty sure it won't be that easy).

Onto the next topic, School related stuff has finally gotten done (mostly) and I shouldn't have to worry on that front. as for Work related stuff, got that resolved as well (though I don't remember if I ever mentioned that I won't here). I also have been trying to improve some more with my art in some ways and even got some materials to take a crack at making a fursuit head. I also got to attend the Megaplex picnic on the 1st which was awesome! I made six pans of scones, and they disappeared within about 20-30 mins (oh my, those took an entire day to make ;u;). At the picnic, I did make a few new floofy friends though and I also got to meet and talk with Scrubb who I really wanted to talk with as he's a femboy (cough cough like me cough cough x3). I was honestly super nervous so getting me to talk with Scrubb was a bit difficult. Luckily one of my new friends helped me to actually meeting Scrubb and talking with him, I'm so glad I got to do that.

anyway though, that's all for this journal. I thought I'd put the more serious stuff first and then the levity at the end so at the least the end bit of the journal has a silver lining. That's all from me for now though, and I'll see you in the next journal/submission ^W^