My hard drive died last Thursday, so I had to buy a new one on Halloween. I spent a lot of the day attempting to reinstall Windows, but kept running into issues. I don't feel like getting into all the issues I had to deal with, but my last issue with installing Windows was with the program I used to install it, Rufus. The program created a partition on my USB, and I was using the wrong partition to try to install it. I feel this situation and what I tried should have been more frustrating than it was. I don't recall being frustrated at all, though. I just spent a lot of time reading and watching Hell's Kitchen while lying on the floor, trying to gain the motivation to continue. I'd work on it a bit and then stop each time there was a setback. I assume a lot of that behavior had to do with taking a break from Adderall that day lol.

Anyway, I am currently reinstalling Clip Studio Art. I hate struggling to motivate myself to draw. I probably need a different approach/mentality about it all. I feel too guilt-ridden and frustrated with myself when I don't draw. I recall yesterday, I decided against drawing because I had already planned on playing Cult of the Lamb. It didn't even cross my mind that I could have done both. Even if it did, I imagine myself very likely to feel a strong resistance to the idea. Earlier this year, I had made a point to read books and draw more, yet I've found it easier to consistently read books than to consistently draw. I assume it is because reading requires less resistance and frustration. Art isn't always frustrating, but the desire to improve, along with the frustration of struggling even with straight lines cripples it.