Games I Actively Play

This is just a writing/thought exercise for myself - a collection of my personal thoughts regarding my characters. What they mean to me, what I think they represent of myself, what I hope to do with them in the future or whatever else I might come up with.

Kyowai (Dranth/Space Bear/The Sona)
I've got a lot of thoughts with the ol bear, but they're scattered thoughts.

I came up with the name for my 'sona when I was an edgy teenager - I was about 17 years old (25 years ago, oof) and I was playing Rival Schools at a friend's house. The character Hyo was my favorite (remember, edgy teen) and one of his supers involved him saying something I didn't fully understand or hear correctly, but it sounded cool. Me, being the edgy teenage weeb I was, adopted this misheard phrase as my online moniker: Kyowai.

The character has gone through a ton of changes over the years. From being a black/white furred demon/displacer beast with wings to then having a weird tail maw, then a bear, then finally the version that is here today.

So, that's all to say that Kyowai is quite the accurate representation of myself. I've always felt ... alien. Even at a young age, I always fantasized while looking up at the sky that a mothership would come down to take me "back home". I never found friend groups that I connected with, let alone having connection with my own family. I tried touching on this through therapy, but while recognizing the core thoughts around it, I have never really figured out how to "fix" this emotional apathy.

At least I have a neat 'sona out of it, I guess.