I don't often write these so if things seem scattered or out of sorts... I hope you, the reader, will understand. There will be some jumping around from last journal in 2014 since a lot happened in the 10+ years.

It's 2023... and after 20 years of working for a company, 2 years of being on disability, and 1 year of being on the job hunt... I'm back to work. Life has been good and the job is nice. Really gives my mind something to work on, but like all things there is good and bad things associated with it. It consumes time, something that my time on disability and without a job felt i had too much of and now i feel i never have enough (the irony wasn't lost there). I am straightening out things like bills and budgets, but I'm running into the same problems that a lot of people I've talked to say they are having: people being unreliable, people taking forever to do things, etc. Nothing like telling a bank that "hey don't pay this anymore. I've cancelled it 2 times and they refuse to do so..." only to have the said bank keep paying it 2 weeks later. On the up side... I have a wonderful group of friends and loved ones who have supported me all this time. To them I can't say thanks enough... my lovely pet :Raven999666: and my mistress :jellydoeopal: I am truly gratefully for all your support and love over these times. I honestly wish i could do more for these two. To my friends... Thank you for your best wishes.

2023 has brought many good things into my life, but also... a lot of bad. A few friends, both furry and not, have left this world. To them, I say, you are missed. Some people who I saw as a friend... turned enemy and left me hurt through their actions. Though the path may be gone a different way and bridge may be burnt, I hold no grudge against them. I neither have time to linger on the past beyond learning from it nor the desire to let such events drag down my future or my mood. I wish them best in their lives and now see them in a clearer picture.

My health has had it's ups and downs... from a debilitating shoulder injury that eventually made me "unfit" to do my job of 20 years to just a sudden cold that just hit me as the latest person to get it in the office (which luckily isn't COVID). I'm still feeling rather blessed in the few times I've been sick... with the number of people i know who have gotten sick with something like COVID to cancer... I feel that I've dodged the worst of it or at least been strong enough, immune wise, to not even notice if I had anything. Mentally, I've gone through a lot. Between PTSD from events surrounding my former job and an altercation that got way out of hand with a former co-worker to depression due to me coming to grips with being suddenly unable to do things that i once did due to the work injury that left me partly disabled, to the loneliness of COVID social distancing and isolation... I've managed and thanks a lot to the two mentioned earlier for their part in keeping me together in those times.

In those years of being disabled, I have been able to find ways to help others. In Destiny 2, I was a sherpa for my clan (i have since retired due to me returning to work and not having the time). I won gold medals in online events... and have become more decorated then my wall can display. I miss those simple times of getting up and logging on to run with my Aussie friends. It's almost like i was a kid again... minus the trauma of childhood in my family life. I was fortunate enough to get a Jeep Wrangler in 2017. Unfortunately, in an attempt to avoid a head on collision with someone in my lane, I went down an embankment and rolled it. Got a new Jeep Wrangler Sahara ("Ivy" is her name)... and honestly have been happy with it. I say it's treated me better then a few of my Exs... It's only a joke but it has treated me pretty nice all the same. I use to visit a coffee house that was down the block, even sang at some of the "open mic" events and often would volunteer to help from time to time to help pass time and keep me active. Unfortunately it closed after the land lord that owned the building allowed mold to take over the building and there was health concerns due to it. A lot of good memories there at the coffeehouse. I'd get breakfast and do some random art of my Ipad. nothing commissioned... just some random thing that would come to my mind and then embellish on it. Example I started with something you'd see a street artist would do with spray cans, like a moon, and by the time I was done I had a full foggy forest with trees and such... Good times.

As an artist... I've put my pen down for the most part. yea, I occasionally will get the desire to draw something or an idea will inspire me to do something, but shoulder injury and resulting pain just was too much especially with me returning to work. One door opens... another closes I guess. Playing bass guitar has been a great deal and with my former soundman leaving to do sound for a new venue, I've been put in the roll of that too. I'm not the all-star guitar player I wanted to be, but I still love the bass and knowing that I give songs that fuller, more rich tone... even if all eyes aren't on me. All things considered I guess that's alright... I never was one for the lime light. Preferred to be the one in the background and being depended on to make others look good. A "servant's heart" as someone once told me.

Anyways... that is, for the most part, the cliff notes on the last ten or more years... Keep your head up. I promise I am not gone. XD