For my up-to-date arts, check my Gallery over on Weasyl
I also have a Telegram channel where I post all my WIPs.

Heyo heyo, fuzzies! Hope y'all're doin' well.
I figured it was about time to post another life update, since alot has happened since the moving-away situation fell thru back in May.

So I decided to stay in Colorado for the timebeing, because I found a job here that seemed tolerable. See, there's this regional combini chain called Maverik; the region being, west of the Mississippi but east of the Continental Divide.
For awhile it was going okay, until I started getting worse/more frequent anxiety attacks. It got to the point where I had to choose between making excuses to avoid going in, versus showing up and risk having to leave early anyway. That's how bad it got for me. The job duties themselves weren't terrible, but more often than not I found myself mentally beating myself up over not being able to, in my own words: "perform such painfully basic tasks with mere adequacy".

Fortunately, about a month ago, I was offered a position at the local card shop I hangout at sometimes. The manager knows me, and I've been coming there since before the Pandemic. I decided to quit my job at Maverik to sort trading cards and fill online orders. Now I am actually enjoying my work without it being a struggle or even a compromise. Plus I get access to free snacks!
I recognise how fortunate I truly am, as very few adults (especially in my age group) are allowed this luxury. So yes, things are starting to look up for me, despite everything these past twelve years.

On the other hand, I'm still extremely frustrated with my ongoing lack of drawing mojo. Whenever I try to sit down and put pencil to paper, I am immediately reminded of why I hate myself, and then shut down emotionally. It's distressing because, all my life, drawing used to be the one thing I could fall back on and rely upon. It's sacred to me, that's why I don't wanna give up; but now it's painful to even think about.....
That's why I'm using this month as an opportunity to force myself to overcome this art-funk by sketching atleast one thing everyday. It can be anything, it doesn't even hafta be good; I just gotta start doing something at all to prevent my creative noodle from becoming atrophied.

So I dunno. I appear to be making progress, but at the same time I feel like I'm not. We'll see.