I think I'll start using this account regularly. So with that said, heres my first update journal.


The days seem short and the nights so long. I wake up in the afternoon and sleep in the morning. This isn't anything new though. I've been this for longer than I can think. Ever since I was little, my circadian rhythms have been fucked. There is a medical reason, but most doctors here don't believe in it. I was very lucky to have a doctor in New Orleans diagnose me. If you wish to know about my disease you can read about it here.

I've been off of my anti depressants for about 2 or 3 weeks now. I can't remember the days coming off of them too well, so my grip on time isn't the best. I know that it was a mistake to come off of these meds, because now I am always irritable and ready to cry or tear someone a new asshole for even asking me a question. When I finally wake up at a decent time I can call to refill my meds, but I'm not sure if they will. I don't even know if I can see my psychiatrist anymore. We owe the office about 500 dollars in late fees. Something we can't pay.

I NEED to get a job, or open commissions. Though my tablet is a piece of shit and is very unreliable, so I'm not sure if opening digital commissions would be good. I may set something up though. I will update if something changes.

As we speak I am applying for jobs. Maybe then I can get a new tablet with my first paycheck and open up digital commissions. until then, Ill be setting up my traditional commissions.

I was looking forward to my girlfriend coming over for new yeas, but thats not happening now. She can't come, and I don't know why yet.
I just found that out. so with that said I;m going to end this journal and go cry for like 3 hours.