It came into my head that since the year is coming to a close, that I should reflect on this passing year and look forward at the upcoming one. With this in mind, many things went through my brain that I would like to touch on.

Thoughts on the passing year:

A lot of things went through my mind when reflecting on the year gone by. Most of them have been negative, as many negative things have happened and I tend to focus on them. I wonder about things I did wrong to those that I hold dear. I ask myself where did I go wrong and why haven't I been able to make it right. I ask what did I do that was so bad, when all I try to do is be good. What mistake was it that I made that pushed those I cared about away so far it seems like they would never want to come back. I've been asking a lot of questions similar to these lately it seems, along with the other crazyness in my head.

Thoughts on the upcoming year:

What comes to mind on the next year is the change, change of the year, change of new life. Questions that come to mind are what can I do to become better, what improvements can I make. The questions in my mind are no different. What can I do to make it all right again, or what can I change that would make it better. What can I do that would make those that are dear to me, see me once more as what they saw before. I don't know, really odd questions like that. The question I ask myself at the beginning of every year is: Where do I go from here now?

Questions I have asked myself:

What am I to those around me? Am I a tool of convenience to be used when the time is fitting? Am I just an acquaintance to talk to, share thoughts with, or just someone to say hello to? Or am I a friend, or more than a friend, someone who sits there day by day and walks through every kind of fire imaginable and breaks his back every day to prove that he is worth being that much more?

Questions I ask myself going into the new year:

Will I change this mindset? Will it change me? Will I do any different than what I have been? Will those people I am around notice what I do so they can understand why I put so much into it? Who knows.

The question still remains though, “Where do I go from here?”

My resolution remains the same as it has always been, not about losing weight or anything like that, that is something that just should be done without a thought in my eyes for me at least. My resolution is to see what comes from this year, what things come in my way and hope that I have the strength to handle them. I will continue to fight, bleed, bend, and break, sweat and shed tears working towards a goal some feel impossible. I will fight, I will not give up, I will work towards that which I hold most closely to my heart and I will be damned if I let anything make me give up on it.