Hey all, It has been about 4 months since I made a journal here. WELL really, it's been about 4 months since I've been active online in general. So um please bear with me as this journal may be kind of.. all over the place.

before I get into it I just want to apologize for my words, I am not that great at portraying what I mean through writing, I am not perfect with English, I try to speak plainly.
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I got a few jobs during this summer that were in.. rural parts of my state, very closed off from the outside world.. so I had little access to internet! I mean I was on twitter quite a bit, because it was the only site I could load properly haha, (even then it was slow)

but yeah, I had some good times this summer, I got back on track with my physical health which I'm very happy about. I can honestly say the same about my mental health as well, even though I was living with some toxic people at the time. Um.. I know I don't really post too much about my private life, and honestly I'm not even sure HOW to do that.. but I want to here. To kind of explain some things on why I was away!

But I want to start with where I am right now. I am staying with my brother Mao, at his apartment, for a month until Bear comes into town (my bf) he is currently at a job similar to mine, in the sense that he has little access to internet and cell service.
I am so thankful that my bro has taken me in, he's been so supportive with me and bear and.. I cannot thank him enough.

Bear and I actually got an apartment. WHICH I am very excited about, but also a little nervous because it will be my first apartment without a million roommates. I honestly think I am ready for it! but yeah we were confirmed for an apartment like 2 weeks ago! They even put it on hold for us until we are ready to move in next month! so that's awesome.

I am currently prepping for commissions again, I want to get some example art done just a bunch of general things really. I've had some people asking if I still do commissions and yes I do! I will be opening some in the next week or two.. but not on this account. Because I will be moving accounts! and I'll post all my links at the end of this journal!

There's a few reasons I want to move accounts, it's not something I ever really wanted to do.. but my art is changing. I haven't been entirely active in the last 2 years and I am following a lot of people who have either moved themselves and or changed account names.. and I have a hard time keeping up. I am very scatterbrained and keeping up-to-date with everyone can be a challenge for me. (so this is a fresh start for that) I will continue to draw the things I have been drawing, not much will change in that sense, but I want to pay closer attention to my artwork, and to give it more love than it has had previously. So that's basically why I want a new start.

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So I made the decision to move away for the summer because I had a couple job opportunity's. That and well.. (if you read my bro's journal you will know more about my living conditions at the time)

I was living with some very toxic people before, and during that time I honestly never felt safe. I won't go into it too much, but it was very uncomfortable and just not a stable environment to be in. I could barely focus, and it distracted me from working (doing commissions) I did not feel safe in my own room.. I looked to escapism a lot then, because at the same time I was dealing with some heavy depression. Honestly my loves kept my head above water, I don't know what I would do without them. I have been dealing with this depression for.. a very long time. I have complex ptsd, and am now finally coming to terms with it. So living in such a shitty environment did not help, it honestly was such a blur to me at the time..

I feel like moving for the summer was the better choice.. I got to save up some money, and get my life back on track. I would like to say that I have overcome my depression this summer, but it's not something that goes away overnight. I am still healing, but I can say without a doubt that I am finally happy. I have my off days, but it's not as bad as it could be. I mean who doesn't have bad days though. I have a better outlook on life now, if anything. I honestly really want to thank my friends for it. Without them, I honestly would not be writing this journal right now.
Last year I started reaching out more, and I am so glad that I did because I've made some of the.. greatest friends. Closest friends. I am so thankful for them, my friends are my family.

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During this summer I was supposed to be completely cut off from the internet and cell service (just because of WHERE the job was) but it turns out that it did work, but I didn't know that then. I was sad to say goodbye to friends, it hurt, I was originally going to shut myself off from everyone, I wasn't even going to write letters! I just felt so hurt to be away from my loves, that.. even writing letters would just hurt. I'm glad things worked out, because I got .. so much closer to 2 of my friends this summer. I absolutely love them, they have changed my life for the better. These two people were so supportive of me, and were very honest with me. I know it's hard to talk to people with depression because it's kind of a touchy subject. When I say they changed my life for the better I mean.. they reminded me that I was human, and was capable. I let my depression eat at me for a good few years, and it was just so unhealthy.. They reminded me that, I did not need someone to protect me, rather I can protect myself. That I am my own knight, and I know that's super corny to say but it's how I feel about it. They were hard on me where others weren't and I am so appreciative of it. It's good to feel like a human again haha, One of you will be reading this i'm sure, and I just want to say thank you..I hope I can be that person for you as well , <3


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So yeah, I am moving accounts, my new username/handle now is wandersnow, so you can call me Wander, Snow, or Now hahaha. I'd appreciate it if I could be referred to as Snow, but I' not expecting the world out of everyone.

Alright you can find me here: https://twitter.com/wandersnow here: https://wandersnow.tumblr.com/

AND here: http://www.furaffinity.net/user/wandersnow/

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not a lot will change for the things I am currently drawing and posting, I have changed my sona quite a bit, he has more human features.. ?? there's that??
um.. my personal art is mainly for me, but everything else will pretty much stay the same. I will try to do more fan art in between things.. I am excited to take commissions again, and may even be doing a couple freebies during the next month over on my twitter so look out for that! I'll talk about it more on twitter later.

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Please give a follow if you would like, I will not be active on xiaoxinge for much longer. I will probably post a few reminders that I have moved accounts here and there.. I am kinda overwhelmed by all the changes going on in my life right now, again I want to just say that I am really scatterbrained.. so sorry If i'm slow to reply.. in general. I am honestly still really worried about bear being at this job, it can be quite dangerous.. so there's that, I am also still really excited to be talking and hanging out with friends more..

I don't have much posted on these accounts I JUST MADE THEM so.. hahaha, expect art from me soon though! Thank you so much for reading. I will prolly make a journal on my new account later today or tomorrow! SOON.

Thanks dude.

-Snow