
This story was originally conceptualized as another Challenge Story, but even before I’d put the first word to the proverbial pen, I knew that this particular story was going to be much, much grander in scope than I could ever complete or express in a single scene; I had failed the Challenge even before I began. Nonetheless, it was one of those stories I just couldn’t get out of my head and needed to be written.
While it is usually in poor taste to read the end of a book first, in this case, everything leading up to the Epilog of this story is just “background information”. It lets the reader get to know the various characters but really isn’t the story itself; that’s what this part really is: the Epilog. If you take everything that the main character could learn or aspire to be in this entire story, then /this/ section highlights those ideals.
As you all know, I am a musician as one of my hobbies, piano and organ being my instruments of choice. A while back, I submitted “Forever: Anthem of the Animals - The Hymn”. The piece described in this excerpt, while still mostly un-composed, is the Finale from that anthem; you will have to use some imagination while you read as writing about music is rather surreal.
I have been told that this is a highly emotionally charged work, so for those of you feint of heart, or a little down in the spirits, then perhaps this is not the story for you to read. For those of you that are daring, as always, feedback is most welcome. The more you can tell me about the various feelings and thoughts that this excerpt provoked, the better.
And for those interested in the /whole/ story, feel free to note me, but be forewarned that this is a work-in-progress, which is to say, “It ain’t done yet!”.
In any case, enjoy, and I look forward to your feedback.
While it is usually in poor taste to read the end of a book first, in this case, everything leading up to the Epilog of this story is just “background information”. It lets the reader get to know the various characters but really isn’t the story itself; that’s what this part really is: the Epilog. If you take everything that the main character could learn or aspire to be in this entire story, then /this/ section highlights those ideals.
As you all know, I am a musician as one of my hobbies, piano and organ being my instruments of choice. A while back, I submitted “Forever: Anthem of the Animals - The Hymn”. The piece described in this excerpt, while still mostly un-composed, is the Finale from that anthem; you will have to use some imagination while you read as writing about music is rather surreal.
I have been told that this is a highly emotionally charged work, so for those of you feint of heart, or a little down in the spirits, then perhaps this is not the story for you to read. For those of you that are daring, as always, feedback is most welcome. The more you can tell me about the various feelings and thoughts that this excerpt provoked, the better.
And for those interested in the /whole/ story, feel free to note me, but be forewarned that this is a work-in-progress, which is to say, “It ain’t done yet!”.
In any case, enjoy, and I look forward to your feedback.
Category Story / Miscellaneous
Species Unspecified / Any
Size 50 x 50px
File Size 74.2 kB
You really shouldn't have me reading this kinda stuff you know:p You know how i get when i read things like this...
This could very well have been a story all on it's own, without you adding more to it. The way this one ended was just... Wow^^, I'm not really sure what to say...
About feelings:
You know how i am with that topic, and you know i might be somewhat of a special case:p But i'll tell you anyway^^,
For me, it started out with sorrow, followed by a mix of sadness and love as the music was played. As i read more into the story, pride entered the picture, but i'm guessing that is more "behind the scenes" feelings than actually being about the story itself.
Towards the end, i might have been reading stuff into it that isn't really there, but i think my feelings went from being in the story itself, to being out here, in the real world:s The last words in this story, just really got me to start sobbing:s It was just, it's one of those moments that you just suddenly understand /everything/...
This may not be a story that is done yet, nor perfect in your eyes, but i want to applaud this work anyway^^, Great writing Shasta!:) Really good stuff here;)
This could very well have been a story all on it's own, without you adding more to it. The way this one ended was just... Wow^^, I'm not really sure what to say...
About feelings:
You know how i am with that topic, and you know i might be somewhat of a special case:p But i'll tell you anyway^^,
For me, it started out with sorrow, followed by a mix of sadness and love as the music was played. As i read more into the story, pride entered the picture, but i'm guessing that is more "behind the scenes" feelings than actually being about the story itself.
Towards the end, i might have been reading stuff into it that isn't really there, but i think my feelings went from being in the story itself, to being out here, in the real world:s The last words in this story, just really got me to start sobbing:s It was just, it's one of those moments that you just suddenly understand /everything/...
This may not be a story that is done yet, nor perfect in your eyes, but i want to applaud this work anyway^^, Great writing Shasta!:) Really good stuff here;)
I guess, having written a portion of the story, and already having a "glimpse" of where I'm intending for it to go - tho things rarely go /exactly/ as intended, and sometime go /way/ off course - there's a bit more depth to what Cendar was trying to say that came across in this portion. But overall, I agree that this portion, tho concluding a larger work, is still very stand-alone'ish in nature.
Thank you for sharing a bit of your feelings. I can't say that I really intended for the emotions to be such powerful sorrow, but it kinda turned out that way. Nonetheless, I hope you liked it, and even with the tears, that it "moved" you.
Thanx for all the feedback!
Thank you for sharing a bit of your feelings. I can't say that I really intended for the emotions to be such powerful sorrow, but it kinda turned out that way. Nonetheless, I hope you liked it, and even with the tears, that it "moved" you.
Thanx for all the feedback!
To be honest, with me, they kinda mixed with things i know has happened irl with someone(You know who i mean), and in the end, this story was no longer about him in the story, but about someone i know passed away a long time ago... (You still know what i mean i hope). I dunno if i'm right, but this ending kinda sounds like something that might have happened irl to someone...
On top of that, "someone" once asked me to play this same anthem in a certain memorial later in life, which kinda brought "back" feelings that will be in the future... If you know what i mean... You know how my brain works:p
Ok, i'm gonna write something more about this story in an email for you, i have questions and feedback to give for it still. But i don't have time right now:s Reptile farm is waiting for me:p It's almost feeding time^^,
Bye for now Shasta^^,
On top of that, "someone" once asked me to play this same anthem in a certain memorial later in life, which kinda brought "back" feelings that will be in the future... If you know what i mean... You know how my brain works:p
Ok, i'm gonna write something more about this story in an email for you, i have questions and feedback to give for it still. But i don't have time right now:s Reptile farm is waiting for me:p It's almost feeding time^^,
Bye for now Shasta^^,
I'm up to chapter nine now, not counting the epilog. I'm hoping that it will all turn out okay, and I still need to do a bit more "character development" scenes so the reader gets to know the different characters a little better.
For stories that I know will end up a bit long, I tend to get a bit sporadic about writing on them. When I'm home and busy all the time, then I tend to write very little. Underway, during those boring moments, I tend to write quite a lot. :)
I hope that this story will go somewhere soon. I like the theme, even /with/ the highly-charged emotional content.
Thanks for the feedback, and I hope that it moved you, both in thought and emotion.
For stories that I know will end up a bit long, I tend to get a bit sporadic about writing on them. When I'm home and busy all the time, then I tend to write very little. Underway, during those boring moments, I tend to write quite a lot. :)
I hope that this story will go somewhere soon. I like the theme, even /with/ the highly-charged emotional content.
Thanks for the feedback, and I hope that it moved you, both in thought and emotion.
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