I never was held as a child, you develop psychosis, by 8, you're made to serve or die or feel your face smashed in, you have no voice to tell, you grow up repressed with a rage a 40 year old probably feels, your dad dies at 13 and you feel suicidal, you're diagnosed with Aspergers and can't go back to school for 3 years and all that anger comes to haunt you in college and you miss it all, you spend the next 4 years sorting out all of that anger, fury, sadness and depression whilst everyone fucking slanders you for not having anyone to tell you how to treat anyone. Since 8, you feel you could die. I'm 20.

You try surviving that. It's dramatic. But it gives you the self discipline of a Buddhist monk. The patience and heart of a saint. But you never, ever, feel real love. You make yourself strong.