Oh.
No.
He.
Didn't!

Girrrrl!

The keywords are a reference to how much wolves like to bury their meat/ food. Ah yes, unearthing putrid meat that has been in the ground for a month, always such a happy, fun time. Also, there's nothing like seeing a wolf exhibit signs of irritation because you are standing in a certain spot.

Sometimes another wolf would dig up a certain wolf's buried cache, and there'd be an argument. But as a caretaker, only the awful scent of fermented ground-meat would betray it's presence. After a month. Barf.


Me: "Why you mad, wolf?"

Wolf: "Because."

Me: "Because, why?"

Wolf: "Can you not smell, human? Your are standing on my buried meat cache, that I packed down with my paws so you would not notice it. You haven't noticed it for a month, why are you suddenly standing over it? You hungry, human? Is that why? Huh? You want to take what little meat I have? Huh??! I see that barbecue!"

Me: "You get fed every day. Five pounds of delicious, raw meat. Why are you hording meat?"

Wolf: "Um, well..." *Shuffles paws while looking down* "I just uh. You know. Just in case... Zombies."

Me: "Can I dig it up, now? The ground is turning black and mushy, and it smells funny."

Wolf: "Oh-okay. Just do it." *Sobs*

Me: "You'd think I was unearthing the last morsel on earth. Tell you what. I'll pour some Coke on the ground for you to go crazy and rub in, later. How's that sound?"

Wolf: "Really? You would do that? For me?"

Me: *Nods*

Wolf: <3


Or, another:

Wolf: "Don't take ma ground meats hooman!"

Me: "I'm takin yer ground meats!"

Wolf: "Nooooo!"