
It was not a good day for Sgt Munch. He'd just been put in charge of the bicycle brigade at the precinct. As he rode around town on his usual route, feeling sorry for himself and trying to ignore the seat digging into his butt, he was thinking of ways he could get out of his new position.
"Maybe if I can do something really great that my captain will appreciate, I can get my squad car back", he thought.
Just then he saw a car roll by. It wasn't speeding, but there was something not quite right. Then he recognized the passenger.
"That's Tara Yaki! The right hand of Don Won-Ton, the most elusive Yakuza boss in town. If I can get a lead on Don Won-Ton, the captain will HAVE to promote me to something better than this!" He began to pedal harder, following the car.
Tara noticed. "Driver", she said, "we're being followed. You know what to do." He nodded and turned off onto a seldom-used road that led up to a hill overlooking the harbor. Munch followed as fast as his legs could pedal. By now he was getting dizzy and out of breath, but that promotion was too sweet to surrender now. He didn't notice the shot of oil that came out of the car until he was almost right on top of it. Munch's wheels slipped, and though he struggled to regain control, his bike, and him with it, went soaring off the side of the hill. Munch blacked out when he slammed against a rock.
When he came to, he was in a dark place, with light streaming down from above him. "Looks like I broke through some kind of trap door" he muttered as he got to his feet. As he looked around, he realized he was in some kind of robotics facility. It looked as though it had been hastily abandoned a long, long time ago. Of particular note was a large sheet thrown over something in the center of the largest room. Working up his nerve, he threw back the sheet and saw an amazing suit of armor...
That was the day that Robo-Rott was born. The suit is powered by a micro-generator that Munch charges by attaching it to his bicycle through the day, so he learned to appreciate being the head (And the only member) of the Bicycle brigade.
Sgt Munch is based on http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1032526/ by
aster-marion and is used with kind permission.
Critique is appreciated.
"Maybe if I can do something really great that my captain will appreciate, I can get my squad car back", he thought.
Just then he saw a car roll by. It wasn't speeding, but there was something not quite right. Then he recognized the passenger.
"That's Tara Yaki! The right hand of Don Won-Ton, the most elusive Yakuza boss in town. If I can get a lead on Don Won-Ton, the captain will HAVE to promote me to something better than this!" He began to pedal harder, following the car.
Tara noticed. "Driver", she said, "we're being followed. You know what to do." He nodded and turned off onto a seldom-used road that led up to a hill overlooking the harbor. Munch followed as fast as his legs could pedal. By now he was getting dizzy and out of breath, but that promotion was too sweet to surrender now. He didn't notice the shot of oil that came out of the car until he was almost right on top of it. Munch's wheels slipped, and though he struggled to regain control, his bike, and him with it, went soaring off the side of the hill. Munch blacked out when he slammed against a rock.
When he came to, he was in a dark place, with light streaming down from above him. "Looks like I broke through some kind of trap door" he muttered as he got to his feet. As he looked around, he realized he was in some kind of robotics facility. It looked as though it had been hastily abandoned a long, long time ago. Of particular note was a large sheet thrown over something in the center of the largest room. Working up his nerve, he threw back the sheet and saw an amazing suit of armor...
That was the day that Robo-Rott was born. The suit is powered by a micro-generator that Munch charges by attaching it to his bicycle through the day, so he learned to appreciate being the head (And the only member) of the Bicycle brigade.
Sgt Munch is based on http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1032526/ by

Critique is appreciated.
Category Artwork (Digital) / General Furry Art
Species Unspecified / Any
Size 1024 x 461px
File Size 103.7 kB
What you did with Wan-ton's torso jacket is really clever. I think it might need a little more...uhm...visual explanation. It wasn't immediately obvious what was going on with it and it distracted from the rest of the scene and characters. Totally keep the torso-jacket though.
The style is cohesive across the four characters shown.
To really nit pick because there is nothing terribly wrong with anything here. Tara's right hand seems a bit long and both of Wat-tons hands could use more definition.
btw- I am assuming you used a halo to make the characters pop out more?
The style is cohesive across the four characters shown.
To really nit pick because there is nothing terribly wrong with anything here. Tara's right hand seems a bit long and both of Wat-tons hands could use more definition.
btw- I am assuming you used a halo to make the characters pop out more?
Well, much like the other person above me said, there isn't much to critique about this piece. It looks very good IMO and well finished. The line work is good, the shading and highlighting works very well and the texture suits the characters very well too.
I also agree how cleverly you did Won-Ton's suit. Subtle, but original! I also enjoy the original names you gave the Don and Kara :P
The only thing I could critique is maybe Don Won-Ton; but, keep in mind that's coming from a person not knowing the character whatsoever. With that name, Won-Ton, and also being a Yakuza mob boss, he doesn't really look that Asian IMO. However, he does look somewhat Mongolian, which is close. But now you have an Asian name, being a Japanese mob boss, who looks Mongolian. Though, Mongolians are big folks in general, so it would fit Don size well.
Finally, would a Japanese mafia allow a Chinese or Mongolian into their rank? Now, mind you, I know absolutely nothing about the Yakuza organization ;P; but, don't they stick to their own kin?
That's the only thing that stuck out for me. Everything else, artistic wise, is spot on!
Great job, lil' bro!
I also agree how cleverly you did Won-Ton's suit. Subtle, but original! I also enjoy the original names you gave the Don and Kara :P
The only thing I could critique is maybe Don Won-Ton; but, keep in mind that's coming from a person not knowing the character whatsoever. With that name, Won-Ton, and also being a Yakuza mob boss, he doesn't really look that Asian IMO. However, he does look somewhat Mongolian, which is close. But now you have an Asian name, being a Japanese mob boss, who looks Mongolian. Though, Mongolians are big folks in general, so it would fit Don size well.
Finally, would a Japanese mafia allow a Chinese or Mongolian into their rank? Now, mind you, I know absolutely nothing about the Yakuza organization ;P; but, don't they stick to their own kin?
That's the only thing that stuck out for me. Everything else, artistic wise, is spot on!
Great job, lil' bro!
I love it.
The characters, the names, the story...everything works together so cohesively that I feel like your additions should've been there from the very start! I like the Don and Tara's designs, and the robot suit and bike uniform are just perfect. Oddly enough, I wasn't planning on doing anything further with the design, so I'm really glad you took up interest in it. I couldn't have imagined it would've inspired such a cool and charming concept! Thank you!!
The characters, the names, the story...everything works together so cohesively that I feel like your additions should've been there from the very start! I like the Don and Tara's designs, and the robot suit and bike uniform are just perfect. Oddly enough, I wasn't planning on doing anything further with the design, so I'm really glad you took up interest in it. I couldn't have imagined it would've inspired such a cool and charming concept! Thank you!!
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