NOTE: I DID NOT MAKE THIS ART!!!

It was made by Capree.
It can be found here: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/11855739/

The character belongs to me.
Art by  capree.

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A few days back, Capree had opened up for some flat color sketch commissions. I somehow managed to grab a slot, which surprised me. When I got it, I realized that I wanted to get something a bit different than the other commissions I've been getting. At least different in tone or emotion. So that's what I got with this.

Originally, it was just something to just show some of the feelings I tend to have, especially in the middle of the school year. I'm horrible at studying, honestly. Didn't really be so much of a problem, but as college gets more difficult, it gets more frustrating. Things like reading text books, I can't do. I can't keep my focus on them for more than a paragraph before my mind wanders to the Internet or a day dream or just some other random though, and then I end up having to reread the paragraph because I forgot it. Plus I'm a habitual procrastinator who leaves all studies to the last minute. So, naturally, the stack of books in this picture are closed as I try to put them off for a moment longer as my mind wanders away. Reason for the clothes he's got on is that he's at home after a long day, so he tries to relax before trying to get to work on the books, so yeah.

More specifically, what's going on in this picture is that he's contemplating working on drawing something, as opposed to school work. That's why his expression is a bit more sad. For me, it seems like after school being the biggest stress I have, the next biggest is just my mind just stressing over how I haven't drawn enough or well enough and stuff like that. Goes back to the procrastinating thing, and school doesn't help either by being mentally draining. Haven't truly drawn something since school started. And that's just...I just hate it, to put it mildly. So, this picture perfectly exemplifies me in that situation, wanting to art but just can't, and often tied down by school.

More recently, though, this can also have a different meaning. Much more personal. Recently, and by that I mean yesterday, my family had to put down one of our cats. Her name was Flower. Even though she was more my brother's cat than anyone's, mostly because he rescued and raised her himself for a while. I took the ordeal really hard, so I can only imagine just how much worse it was for him. Yesterday, this picture was me, or at least me once the tears stopped. I wasn't really all there mentally. My mind just drifting to thoughts and such. There was vague sadness about me. So the fact I received this finished picture at the end of that day seemed like it was fitting, and that's how I reasoned this third interpretation of the picture.

So, in the end, I find this picture really personal. It shows some feelings that I feel, but never really expressed in either the art I make or the art I commission. I'm glad I got it.

Big thanks to  capree for doing amazing on this. Thank you so much.