More Attacks of the Bad Dream Beam

Super C here. You previously heard Leo the Patriotic Lion mention how amongst other laws that are just plain ridiculous, but this sports law we had forbidding those from leaving the game early unless it was deemed a truly worthy emergency was the latest law to get struck down by the Supreme Court. Too many of our laws violated all the rights citizens have as Americans, especially the First Amendment. It’s no wonder that while we revealed Leo was just having a bad dream, the thought of Wildcat City turning into its own stand-alone nation and possibly forcing Cripto’s powers to move us to an island and switching us to just being an American territory was becoming more of a reality.

“Yes, we’re all idiots!” he said to the press one day. “You just get the feeling this place is way too fascist and totalitarian. If you’re going to live here, until these laws get repealed, and many of them will, you’re safest if you just keep your mouth shut. The sports one got struck down, but I have a feeling that because it was once a law, people will stay for the whole game anyway. Remember that our marching band reputation does ensure all people will stay for the whole football game, because while WU’s football team never was very good, the stadium still gets sellout crowds. The band gets more support than the team ever will. And they’re not the only school can that brag that I’m sure.”

When the press asked me about my opinions, I replied, “All I can say is that Wildcat City, in spite of its intense love of music evident by the huge number of bands as well as Leo’s influence, we might as well be labeled stereotypically as misinformed, uneducated, or most accurately, stupidly narrow-minded. We seem to be unconsciously preaching propaganda that is in all truth conformist. If you don’t agree with what we believe, then you’re wrong. That’s what critics are saying. Somehow tourism is increasing instead of decreasing. It’s not anything Cripto is doing. I think that we’re becoming the laughing stock of the world and yet people still want to visit us. Is there some oxymoron we don’t know about? Or is it the fact we’re unique in the eyes of some but deserving isolation from the world in the eyes others? There’s too many factors to figure it out. It’s as complicated as an unemployed person having trouble finding a job trying to figure out why he or she keeps getting rejected, but possibly finding thing to blame it on. All you who are unemployed, you know what I’m talking about, I hope.”

Too many thoughts kept on buzzing through our heads as we prepared to battle Bendraqi once more, and lame as he was, at least he was ensuring we still had our jobs. “What’s he trying to do now if he isn’t hypnotizing anybody?” I asked.

“I think what he’s trying to do is another bad dream beam,” Thunder Fox reported. “The random victim lives in the Philippines, and he’s been having bad dreams all consisting of him framed for a crime that wasn’t his doing and the police always arresting him. The trial then find him guilty and he gets the death penalty by firing squad.”

“Haven’t been there before,” Cripto commented. “Not in a case of Bendraqi’s attacks, anyway.” He turned to Leo and asked, “How are you feeling today?”

“I don’t know whether to feel happy or sad, soldier,” Leo replied. “I really don’t want us to split from the nationality that I am, and that you are. Yet even without Bendraqi, the hatred just keeps on coming. Maybe common sense will strike us and convince us just how rotten those laws of ours are, because all it does is guarantee you are only safe if you never say a word. So the absolute one G-52 and one ally safe under the scenario I am describing would be Tom and his father. Tom almost never says a word. He is not with me today since he is taking time to spend with his dad, so I’m flying the Patriotmobile solo.”

“John not with you either?” I asked.

“No, he’s helping with a percussion clinic.”

“Hmmm. I guess he’s not upset about the city being nothing but a huge controversy, at least as the media wants all to think.”

“Media? Don’t talk to me about the media; I’m already getting a bad rap from them. I always have and I always will. Yet the public loves me more for it. It’s just one of those unexplainable things.”

“I guess so. The fact that we’re no longer being a city with harsh laws should at least make things more tolerable for us.”

“Yes. And we must be tolerant of others’ beliefs and opinions. Yet I guarantee you that nothing would ever change on Kriegland if it was still a planet. I guess their destruction was a blessing in disguise. ‘Life sounds miserable,’ Leo the Tiger said to me yesterday, ‘because we were an absolute monarchy, so whatever the king said went. Yet you’d think we’re essentially WW2 Germany, times 10 billion, because too many things got you death on Kriegland, and King Leo sadly regrets it. He still has nightmares about it, and it’s got nothing to do with Bendraqi’s weaponry.’”

“Strange.”

“I know. Meanwhile, let’s break into the base once again. Did we trash that one before?”

“I think so, and we’ll trash it again. Bendraqi’s good at one thing if nothing else—well, two things actually. One is breaking out of Alcatraz, and the second is resurrecting sunken islands and the bases they were on.”

We landed at the hideout and discovered it was indeed one we had trashed earlier, but it was long before we added the sixteen new members I recruited via doing a revival of “The Krypton Factor.” But since our newer members were getting more action, we decided to let Thunderstorm Sam’s thunderous abilities combine with the electromagnetic palms of Magnocat in order to break through the base’s entrance.

The difference was that this time, Bendraqi was all by himself. “Either he fired or killed all his goons,” I thought, “or he’s done what I think he’s done: given them all a holiday. Even villains need a vacation. In any case, let’s find the beam old nutso fatso is using.”

Bendraqi, tragically though hardly unexpected from us, had to improvise since he was caught off guard (again) by our attacks. Today would mark a first, though: although we had him surrounded, he was able to finally hit us with a zap of the beam. I ended up taking the hit so that Leo didn’t have to, considering Leo had been hit before, and was getting the nightmares of Wildcat City separating from the U.S. of A. “Those dreams are almost prophecies,” he remembered aloud as everybody watched the horror that followed. “I’m praying to the big man in the sky that they are false.”

The beam’s effect immediately put me to sleep, and I began having the very bad dreams Bendraqi wanted me to have. Instead of dreams of separation, however, the bad dream I currently was having labeled me as a fugitive from justice in superhero’s clothing. I was found guilty of murder and had to hang up the cape forever as I promised the nation I would do. (This was a promise of which in real life I repealed at Queen Junira’s suggestion, because she helped us all to see that ending the G-52s and/or me personally ending my superhero career over such a case and hanging up the cape for good would cause a disaster 10,000 or 100,000 times worse than the 9/11/2001 attacks.) Nothing my colleagues could do could awaken me. It seemed Cripto couldn’t even save me.

“Oh, you monster!” D.W. screamed. “What have you done to the boss?”

“Indeed you shall pay for the way you’ve wrecked the mind of our Commander!” Leo echoed, although he wasn’t bellowing.

On and on I continued to shout, “No! No! I swear I am innocent! This isn’t happening!” As I did, my colleagues continued to attempt to awaken me. T2, Crush, and F.C. went ahead and trashed the beam, much to Bendraqi’s dismay. Nothing he could do went his way. “Murphy’s law, do your stuff!” T2 screamed as his wiring investigations determined F.C. could burn it to ashes by running at supersonic speed and leaving a trail of flames behind him. He did just that. He and H.H. (Hyper Husky) also grabbed me and took me out of the hideout as Boomcat blew it up with his powers and sank the island (again). Danger Dawg and Warwolf threw him back in Alcatraz according to the rotation we were developing.

On the way, the dream just wouldn’t end. It had to be one of the worst dreams I ever had. I’ve never had such a horrible one before, and I have never had one since. But I want all to know that I am grateful that it was just a dream, and dreams are not reality. All the friends I had was reality. I think that’s a lesson worth teaching to your children if they ever have any bad dreams. And since I was dreaming, of course, I had no idea I was in the back of the Patriotmobile on the way home. Thus, by the time I finally woke up, I was in Leo the Patriotic Lion’s living room, evident by the patriotic décor that he uses for his house all year round, even at Christmastime.

“I…I…I swear…uh…oh. What just happened?” I finally sputtered out as I woke up.

“Don’t you remember, Commander?” Leo asked. “Old nutso fatso wanted me to have those same horrible dreams again. You showed your true courage and abilities in your duties as Commander by taking the hit in my place. You must have been dreaming you were on the run from the cops.”

“I was,” I said. “I ended up hanging up the cape in the end, just as I promised I’d do before, but then having to promise to Junira that I wouldn’t do that because all it would do is cause a disaster that makes the terrorism attacks of 2001 seem like no big deal at all.” A few tears escaped my eyes as a result of the nightmare I had from the base to the living room that was Leo’s.

“You quit the G-52s or quit yourself, and it’s the end of all humanity as we know it, I heard one person say,” Super Slash replied. “Don’t feel bad, Super C. Don’t even thinking about ending your career either. We need you as much as you need us, and by ‘we’ and ‘us,’ I don’t just mean the G-52s and allies. I mean America. I mean the world. I even mean the entire universe we live in.”

“I’m not going to quit,” I replied as I took a few deep breaths. “I’m not doing anything that drastic. She binded me to that promise and I changed the policies as you all know. Yet I should have anticipated that in this bad dream of mine, such would indeed be the case. I need to rest from the stress. So don’t bother waiting on me considering it’s about time to eat dinner. Go ahead without me. I don’t intend to sound grumpy.”

“It’s all good. We understand,” Cripto replied. “I’d be the same way if I were you.”

By now, we all left to go ahead and change wardrobes for casual wear, except Leo, of course, since he was already home. And as a way to rest and relax, I just ate a TV dinner at home while working on a crossword puzzle. The others all met in Cripto’s basement after choosing the takeout of their choice, either by ordering it to go inside or through means of the drive-thru. Some got various Chinese takeout items from takeout-only places, some got Maximum Mighty Melt anyway, some got KFC, some got Arby’s, some got Taco Bell, some got Zaxby’s, D.W. got Burger King and Cripto himself got Popeye’s Chicken & Biscuits. Naturally, upon all meeting in the basement, the dominant topic of discussion was concern over me. Leo, naturally, showed the biggest concern.

“I’ve never seen the Commander suffer like that,” he said as he sipped his soda. “I just wish I knew how to wake him up.”

“Well, not even I could wake him up with all the methods I was trying,” Cripto replied. “I guess he had to just dream it out. Or was it getting him into safety in the form of your house that did it?”

“Whatever it is, we defeated Bendraqi and saved the day. That’s all that really matters, isn’t it?” Super Leo put in.

“I guess you’re right about that,” said D.W. “He’s our friend and we’re his friends. We all must look out for each other, and we all must do our part to save the day. But I suggest for his sake we leave him alone for a few days. He needs the rest.”

“I agree,” Leo nodded. “I also agree that we must all look out for one another. It’s what friends are for.”

THE END

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Queen Junira is the idea of  16weeks and is used with permission; 16weeks himself is Prince Zanta, the son of Queen Junira.