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Hey guys~ I wanted to get some opinions on this piece i did randomly the other day. It's partly vent/personal writing and I just wanted to see what other people thought of it ^_^ Thank you for your time!
Her Dark Knight
The stars glittered that night, brighter than she had ever seen before. Or maybe it was just that everything seemed better that night. Her hear pounded in her chest as she waiting patiently in the half-light of evening. The summer air was cool and a gentle breeze blew her light colored hair into her dark blue eyes. With a gentle movement of her hand she brushed her hair from her eyes to look up at the Cheshire Cat smile the moon was giving her. She sighed softly and looked back down at the light purple silk of her dress, playing gently with the edge of her royal purple cloak.
Even as she waited anxiously she smiled at the thought of what was waiting for her in the night. There was a soft rustle in the branches, but it wasn’t the wind. A small bit of bright orange was visible for a moment and the girl’s breath caught in her throat. Was it him?
And as if to answer her question the branches were pushed away to reveal a mess of slightly spiked black hair with orange bangs that hung in front of the dark red-brown eyes that always brought her in. His smile broadened her own as he approached her where she sat on an ancient stone bench. He kneeled in front of her, his black cloak almost causing him to blend in with the night as he reached out for her hand. He took it gently in his own hand and lightly kissed her pale skin before looking up at her.
“I made it.” He whispered.
“Just in time.” She spoke softly.
“I’m glad. I would’ve rather died than miss this chance…”
“Don’t say that!” The young girl quickly put her arms around him to hug him close to her. Her pale blonde hair fell in front of her eyes; deep blue and now tear filled as the thought behind his words struck her. He gently returned the embrace.
“I’m sorry, that was cruel…” He whispered to her, pulling away from her to lovingly kiss her forehead. “Don’t worry, I won’t leave till I’ve been able to live with you as my own.” He gently ran his fingers through her hair. The gentle and familiar touch calmed her and she hesitantly gave him a soft smile. He lightly touched her cheek with his palm.
“You’re so brave for me…” He spoke softly. “I’m proud of you.”
“I love you too much to do anything else!” She replied quickly, blushing at her own words. He smiled at her as his thumb gently rubbed her cheek, his hand lightly caressing her soft skin.
“I wish I could have your bravery.” He spoke softly to her.
“You do, you have more bravery than I to fight as hard as you do. But I still wish there was more I could do to help you…” Her voice was strong and sure at first but faded to a soft almost sad sounding tone when she finished.
“You can help.”
“How?”
“Let me kiss you.” His words made her blush deeply and she gently shook her head, embarrassed. “Please, so I’ll always remember what I’m fighting for.” He spoke softly and gently, turning her head to look at him.
“But…”
“Please, just one…” She looked into his eyes, hesitant, but when she saw the pleading look in his eyes, her barriers and fears seemed to melt under the heat of his red eyes. She gave a soft nod and before she could blink his lips were gently pressed to hers. Her eyes went wide for a moment then softened before closing.
The kiss was simple, passionate and sweet, not a lustful kiss that drew out the animalistic natures of man. Her heart raced as they held the kiss, she wanted that sweet moment to last forever. But at the same time she was frightened since she knew that there could be a night were he wouldn’t come again…
Gently he broke the kiss and pulled away from her gently.
“Thank you for letting me have that moment.” He gently kissed her cheek, smiling at her.
“Promise me you’ll stay safe. Please, promise me…” She begged him. His smile faded a little at her words.
“I swear, I’ll come back and we’ll be able to live the rest of our lives together. It’s not that much longer that we have to be apart. We both just need to hold on a little longer. Can you do that for me?” He asked softly. Hesitantly she nodded. She then leaned forward to hug him tightly, nearly falling on to him as she slipped from the bench. She bit her lip to hold back the tears that threatened to flow. She knew everything would be alright in the end, but she didn’t want to have to risk losing him anymore.
“As long as I know you’re mine… I can make it.” She whispered.
“I’m yours forever.” He gently pushed her away and back onto the bench she had been sitting on. “I have to get going before they realize I’m gone.” He said as he rose, pulling his cloak around him. She nodded and smiled at him through tears stung her eyes. He gave her a gentle half smile. He knew that she was masking her pain for him, but he knew she understood. He leaned forward and kissed her cheek.
“Goodnight, my love.” He whispered in her ear before turning to walk away.
“Goodnight, my dark knight.” She smiles a little, watching him disappear through the branches of the bushes and trees of her garden. The breeze blew again through the trees, as if wiping their memory so they could say he had never been there, but she knew better. She knew in her heart that he had touched her and that she had given him a kiss that neither one of them would ever forget, so he can always remember her.
“What are you doing out here?! You’re supposed to be inside! Everyone is looking like mad men for you!” A servant called to her as he rushed through the trees behind her. She looked over her shoulder with a faint smile.
“I’m sorry… I wanted to enjoy the company of my love for a while.” The servant laughed.
“You and you’re love of the nighttime, Milady. It’ll kill you one of these days.” She laughed and shook her head.
“Never…” She looked back in the direction that her knight had gone. “It could never kill me. It could only make me stronger.” She sighed and stood. “Alright, let’s go…” The servant turned and started walking back towards the mansion that loomed gloomily in the background. She hesitated a moment, still looking in the direction that her lover had gone.
“You will be the death of me…” She whispered before turning and starting to walk away. “But I hope only after a long life with you beside me…”
For a moment, she thought she heard a reply on the wind as it blew past her.
She smiled a little at the thought of what he would say, scolding her perhaps for thinking negatively.
“I love you…”
Thanks again if you read this. Please let me know what you think <3 Love you guys :3
Her Dark Knight
The stars glittered that night, brighter than she had ever seen before. Or maybe it was just that everything seemed better that night. Her hear pounded in her chest as she waiting patiently in the half-light of evening. The summer air was cool and a gentle breeze blew her light colored hair into her dark blue eyes. With a gentle movement of her hand she brushed her hair from her eyes to look up at the Cheshire Cat smile the moon was giving her. She sighed softly and looked back down at the light purple silk of her dress, playing gently with the edge of her royal purple cloak.
Even as she waited anxiously she smiled at the thought of what was waiting for her in the night. There was a soft rustle in the branches, but it wasn’t the wind. A small bit of bright orange was visible for a moment and the girl’s breath caught in her throat. Was it him?
And as if to answer her question the branches were pushed away to reveal a mess of slightly spiked black hair with orange bangs that hung in front of the dark red-brown eyes that always brought her in. His smile broadened her own as he approached her where she sat on an ancient stone bench. He kneeled in front of her, his black cloak almost causing him to blend in with the night as he reached out for her hand. He took it gently in his own hand and lightly kissed her pale skin before looking up at her.
“I made it.” He whispered.
“Just in time.” She spoke softly.
“I’m glad. I would’ve rather died than miss this chance…”
“Don’t say that!” The young girl quickly put her arms around him to hug him close to her. Her pale blonde hair fell in front of her eyes; deep blue and now tear filled as the thought behind his words struck her. He gently returned the embrace.
“I’m sorry, that was cruel…” He whispered to her, pulling away from her to lovingly kiss her forehead. “Don’t worry, I won’t leave till I’ve been able to live with you as my own.” He gently ran his fingers through her hair. The gentle and familiar touch calmed her and she hesitantly gave him a soft smile. He lightly touched her cheek with his palm.
“You’re so brave for me…” He spoke softly. “I’m proud of you.”
“I love you too much to do anything else!” She replied quickly, blushing at her own words. He smiled at her as his thumb gently rubbed her cheek, his hand lightly caressing her soft skin.
“I wish I could have your bravery.” He spoke softly to her.
“You do, you have more bravery than I to fight as hard as you do. But I still wish there was more I could do to help you…” Her voice was strong and sure at first but faded to a soft almost sad sounding tone when she finished.
“You can help.”
“How?”
“Let me kiss you.” His words made her blush deeply and she gently shook her head, embarrassed. “Please, so I’ll always remember what I’m fighting for.” He spoke softly and gently, turning her head to look at him.
“But…”
“Please, just one…” She looked into his eyes, hesitant, but when she saw the pleading look in his eyes, her barriers and fears seemed to melt under the heat of his red eyes. She gave a soft nod and before she could blink his lips were gently pressed to hers. Her eyes went wide for a moment then softened before closing.
The kiss was simple, passionate and sweet, not a lustful kiss that drew out the animalistic natures of man. Her heart raced as they held the kiss, she wanted that sweet moment to last forever. But at the same time she was frightened since she knew that there could be a night were he wouldn’t come again…
Gently he broke the kiss and pulled away from her gently.
“Thank you for letting me have that moment.” He gently kissed her cheek, smiling at her.
“Promise me you’ll stay safe. Please, promise me…” She begged him. His smile faded a little at her words.
“I swear, I’ll come back and we’ll be able to live the rest of our lives together. It’s not that much longer that we have to be apart. We both just need to hold on a little longer. Can you do that for me?” He asked softly. Hesitantly she nodded. She then leaned forward to hug him tightly, nearly falling on to him as she slipped from the bench. She bit her lip to hold back the tears that threatened to flow. She knew everything would be alright in the end, but she didn’t want to have to risk losing him anymore.
“As long as I know you’re mine… I can make it.” She whispered.
“I’m yours forever.” He gently pushed her away and back onto the bench she had been sitting on. “I have to get going before they realize I’m gone.” He said as he rose, pulling his cloak around him. She nodded and smiled at him through tears stung her eyes. He gave her a gentle half smile. He knew that she was masking her pain for him, but he knew she understood. He leaned forward and kissed her cheek.
“Goodnight, my love.” He whispered in her ear before turning to walk away.
“Goodnight, my dark knight.” She smiles a little, watching him disappear through the branches of the bushes and trees of her garden. The breeze blew again through the trees, as if wiping their memory so they could say he had never been there, but she knew better. She knew in her heart that he had touched her and that she had given him a kiss that neither one of them would ever forget, so he can always remember her.
“What are you doing out here?! You’re supposed to be inside! Everyone is looking like mad men for you!” A servant called to her as he rushed through the trees behind her. She looked over her shoulder with a faint smile.
“I’m sorry… I wanted to enjoy the company of my love for a while.” The servant laughed.
“You and you’re love of the nighttime, Milady. It’ll kill you one of these days.” She laughed and shook her head.
“Never…” She looked back in the direction that her knight had gone. “It could never kill me. It could only make me stronger.” She sighed and stood. “Alright, let’s go…” The servant turned and started walking back towards the mansion that loomed gloomily in the background. She hesitated a moment, still looking in the direction that her lover had gone.
“You will be the death of me…” She whispered before turning and starting to walk away. “But I hope only after a long life with you beside me…”
For a moment, she thought she heard a reply on the wind as it blew past her.
She smiled a little at the thought of what he would say, scolding her perhaps for thinking negatively.
“I love you…”
Thanks again if you read this. Please let me know what you think <3 Love you guys :3
Category Story / Fantasy
Species Human
Size 50 x 50px
File Size 16.4 kB
It won't change anything. If anything its only pushed him towards helping me figure out what's going out so that I can move to live with him as soon as possible. He spoke to his mom and she has even offered to let me stay there so that we don't have to worry trying to find a place or anything that we could afford. He hadn't even tried to talk to her yet really till after i sent him the story =)
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