It had finally happened. Dan knew that one day, he was going to head to his truck after working until two in the morning, and on that day--or night--whatever--he was going to find a shady figure waiting nearby to rob or stab him. He knew it was bound to happen. He had imagined many scenarios, where he ran away or tried to defend himself or tripped up and made a fool of himself. He had almost gotten to the point of fantasizing about it, wishing it would happen just so he'd find out how it all would happen. Here it was, just as he imagined, except for one thing: the shady figure was brightly lit underneath the street lamp, and it turned out to be a large, muscular lizardman.

The creature leaned back against Dan's truck, head turned to watch him with what Dan could only assume was a grin on his leathery muzzle. The Lizardman waited patiently as Dan boldly approached his truck. Dan decided that he was going to go the logical route and try to reason with the thing blocking his way home.

"Hey, buddy." The lizardman spoke first. He shifted, lifting up a leg and resting it on the other one to show Dan the sole of his three-toed foot. "Mind giving a sore foot a quick rub?" His voice was much deeper than Dan had expected, even for someone so big. "You'll like it. It's nice and hot for ya."

No amount of scenario-making could have ever prepared Dan for this. The bizarreness of the lizardman's request left him too confused to be intimidated. Lifting an eyebrow, he said, "Uh, n--MMRRPHH!"

The lizardman had shoved his foot right into Dan's face. He tried to take a step back, but he felt the thing's toes curl down over his head, holding him in place. Struggling for breath, he felt hot, leathery footpads smothering him, shifting and kneading his face into the foot's sole.

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Models used: Lizardman from Vindictus.
Generic male model from Half-Life.

Map used: cs_citynighthdr.bsp.

So it turns out that SFM content is only allowed if it is either animated or used to create comics with a minimum of 4 panels (at least, I'm assuming animation is allowed, but I didn't get explicit confirmation that it is unlike the latter). It'd be kinda nice if any of this was actually listed in the friggen AUP (or, I dunno, if the administration actually followed their own damn policy and didn't enforce new rules that haven't been added to it yet), but at least now I have SOME reassurance that this won't get taken down again.