Very awesome! I love it. Trixie was due for some punishment. And I love the way you played Luna and Celestia, especially Luna. SATISFACTION! lol

Thank you, and I tried. I put a looooot of thought into how I would portray the princesses, since the last time I wrote them they were the protagonists, whereas here they're anti-villains. But yes, I had fun.

I must say, that was certainly a fun (and surprisingly long) ride!

If this is testing the waters for commissions (as the tags say), you've certainly piqued my interest!

(that was one of the reasons why I wanted to do a one-off story, to see how long my turnaround time would be between the request and finished product. All in all, it took me about 3 weeks, which I'm a little disappointed about, but I started just as finals month began, so I don't know how long it would have taken if I didn't have that to worry about.)

Personally, I wouldn't consider 3 weeks for a story of this length to be all that bad, especially given your described circumstances.

One of the main things holding me back from opening commissions is that I don't want to be a terrible commissioner. One of the things I'm worried about is turnaround time. My following isn't terribly large, and I don't know how many times they'll be coming back for more, so I have to keep everyone as happy as I can.

I'd love to commission you man. And I don't mind a longer turnabout. I practically consider you a friend and I understand that this stuff takes time. Especially since I've tried writing some stuff, lol.

I haven't fully read the story, but I do have a few concerns. (I'll try to keep things vague to prevent spoiling too much for the others.)

Are Celestia and Luna pretending Trixie really did do the crime, so Luna can enjoy performing some old-time punishment again? I mean I'm finding it a bit hard to believe they would think Trixie was guilty when there were so many witnesses around.

It's not so much her culpability as it is her failure to take even the smallest bit of responsibility for it, and generally for bullying and harassing ponies everywhere she goes. The legal side of it is just a technicality; it was more a combination of wanting to punish/reform her for being mean, favoritism over her picking on Twilight, and the fact that they've gone for weeks without a prisoner to punish.

And, in case I don't make it obvious enough, no, their justice system doesn't really work. Luckily for them, the Elements of Harmony are around to clean up after their messes.

So they were completely aware, but decided to use an old justice system on Trixie in order to reform her and give Luna good memories of old times?

I can dig it. Thanks for answering.

Well, I finally got around to reading this. I was expecting something amazing, and that's pretty much what I got. Something amazing. Holy crap, you are one talented writer, that's a given! I don't think I've ever seen such a magnificent story like this before! At least not one tailored towards some of my favorite fetishes and characters. Where do I even begin?

First off, Trixie is my favorite character in My Little Pony, right alongside Twilight Sparkle and Rainbow Dash. All three are pretty much on equal footing at the top of my list. So seeing a story about Trixie involved with some of my favorite things was already enticing. While I wasn't sure how seeing two of the princesses perform the punishments would play out, I must admit that I mostly liked the way you wrote them. When I thought they might be getting TOO silly and playful, you made sure to show their serious and stern sides right afterwards. We really don't see Luna's playful side that much anymore since her big debut episode, which is a shame, so it's nice that you incorporated that side of her throughout this. Trixie seemed pretty in-character as well. At first thought, I don't think she would be so mean just the entire way through and hardly show ANY kindness or thought of repentance. But then I thought about and realized that I'm 100% with her. I'm not sure how YOU feel personally, but I believe that Trixie wasn't to blame for either of the problems that occurred during her first two trips to Ponyville. The first time was Snips and Snails' fault; Trixie was just performing and doing her job, and the Elements all harassed her, so she put them in her place. It was then Snips and Snails that pretty much destroyed the town. As for the second time, Trixie had every right to want revenge; she just went overboard due to the Alicorn Amulet. So, if I was her, I wouldn't show any level of contrition or repentance, either. So props for keeping Trixie in-character the whole way through!

The kinks themselves were pretty awesome, but I did have a minor complaint which is one of the few I had with this. I know you said right there in your author's notes that you like to consider yourself the Peter Jackson of this fetish, and that easily shows. But sometimes that just doesn't work so well, at least not for me. For example, during the first Trixie squashing, I think it was said she was squashed into a brick-form? But...how? I didn't really understand. I read slow and everything, but it seemed like there was too MUCH detail. So...Trixie had a collar or leash on? And...she found a space in the wall? And she, for some reason, tried to somehow squeeze through a space that was nowhere near big enough for her? I mean...what? And this happened many times throughout your story. Most of the time I understood what was going on and relished it, but other times it just seemed like all the detailing was just bogging down the action and moving it along far too slowly to get into a groove. Again, I understand that's your style for this, and that's fine! I'm just recounting my personal experience with it, that's all. It's just that it's sometimes hard to enjoy something if there's far too much being explained. It's impressive, but not ALWAYS needed. Speaking of that, what was with that collar or whatever? So Trixie had a collar around her neck the entire time that she was being tortured? And sometimes when you tried to describe Trixie's actions, they left me with a very weird image in my head. Like when Celestia and Luna were mashing Trixie into a pancake to sit on at the start, or when she was being morphed into different ball forms or something when she was being tossed around. It was very confusing at times.

Moments of Trixie's final, ultimate punishment honestly reminded me of one of my favorite movies: MouseHunt. Such as when she was being pulled through the mousetraps. Not sure if you were really referencing that at all, but regardless, I liked it! And just all of Trixie's punishments in general I loved and appreciated. From being flattened into a seat for both princesses to sit on, to being used as a ball to be tossed back and forth, to Trixie going through a wringer and then being crammed into a jar, all the way to the monstrous grand finale that really lived up to all the hype! Again, sometimes all the long, drawn-out details made it hard to follow, but easy enough to say it was highly hilarious, enjoyable, and even professional! The dream sequences were a little confusing, though. It was obvious Luna was most likely making Trixie have such dreams, but...what exactly was going on? So...was there two Trixies in the dreams? And...what was with that monster or whatever? Ugh! Finally, what in the world is up with the ending? First we see Celestia and Luna saying they know the perfect punishment for Trixie, and the next thing we know Trixie is being released. So...HOW did they punish Trixie before releasing her? I honestly have no idea what is up with the ending. And I HATE it when I don't get an ending. One of the many reasons why Planet Of The Apes pisses me off; amazing movie, but I HATE that sudden and confusing ending.

Overall, I loved it. There were minor typing mistakes here and there, but nothing too major. No one is perfect, especially me. And the massive detailing DID bug me sometimes. But, overall, I really loved this. You are truly a great writer and this is probably going to become one of my favorite My Little Pony stories I've ever found on the entire internet. Honestly, that's the truth! If you ever write anymore or want to collaborate together on one or whatever, please look me up! I love all the same things you do and I think we could really write well together! But, in conclusion, I really loved the story, loved the fetishes used, loved the characters, and loved how much effort and passion you put into it. You rock!

*slams into wall of text*

First of all, thank you.

Second of all, I'm sorry that you had a hard time understanding some of my descriptions. I'm a really visual, tactile person and I imagine the whole thing playing out in my head, more or less in real time as I'm writing, so I try to describe things as clearly and concisely as I can, while at the same time pacing it in such a way that the reader visualizes it as quickly or as slowly as I imagine. In theory. Quick actions and subtle facial expressions usually warrant quick descriptions, while slow actions, more over-the-top visuals, or something with a detailed close-up or multiple camera angles will usually warrant more drawn out descriptions. Anyways, like I said, that's my goal when I'm writing, I don't know how well that comes across unless I get complaints. I could try to describe some of the events more clearly here, but...I think it's kind of pointless, since I'm supposed to convey things clearly the first time through.

As for the dream sequences, I don't remember if that was my or Noc's idea, but once I knew I was gonna have a nightmare sequence, I took inspiration from one of the pictures in Noctulov's gallery, and decided to explore her character a bit by heaping on a big, steaming pile of symbolism. The first one moreso than the second one. The first one mainly explores her normal desire for power and dominance over other ponies, and the conflicting feeling of guilt she has over the ursa minor, which she isn't really aware of yet. The second one is more of a basic fear of the princesses.

As for the ending, this is intended as a prequel to the events of Sombra's Game, where, if you recall, Trixie reminisces over all the times she's received the royal punishment, and she says her first time they cast a charm on her that made her fill with hot air every time she boasted. I really wanted to include that, but I'm always afraid of my stories running on a bit too long, and since I was already going longer than Sombra's Game, and painfully aware of it, I felt like it would be better to just wrap it up quickly. So it ends abruptly, with some little details that bridge the gap between Boast Busters and Magical Duel, as well as foreshadow Trixie's role in Sombra's Game.

Anyways, I'm glad you enjoyed it overall, and thank you for the critique!

*inflates you back to normal after you flatten yourself* You're very welcome.

It's not that I prefer things to be made easier because I'm dumb and can't understand complicated things or anything. I don't know. I guess it's just a personal preference sort of thing. But, as I said, it wasn't a bad thing; it was really amazing and thorough. I was very impressed. I guess I'm just someone who really enjoys reading stories that aren't AS detailed, but still manage to get the point across in a fun, sexy, amusing, or clever way that doesn't have to rely on overly-complicated explanations. But again, I loved your story, so who knows?

Ah, that makes sense. I assume the picture you're referring to was this amazing one: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/9658566/ If so, that makes sense, since that picture is awesome and it was what came to my head when I saw that dream sequence. It makes sense now!

Oh, okay, now I get it. So, basically, Trixie put on a show, but she pretty much humiliated herself thanks to the princesses. I thought it was something like that.

You're very welcome. An amazing story deserves a long, thought-out comment. If you put in the work, you deserve to be given thorough feedback. I really did love the story. I see you write sparingly, much like I do, given your story updates, so I'm not sure when we'll see any more from you. But, as I said, I'd love to collaborate with you sometime! You really are talented and I love that we share the same interests!

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to implicate that you were dumb or anything like that.

Anyways, a collab...might help with my motivation a bit, but I don't want to make any promises I can't keep.

Nah, you didn't do that. I guess it was just me explaining my own personal style compared to yours. No worries!

No, I understand! Anything you'd like to do or try, I'm perfectly fine with! No promises need to be given.

Lovely work, as always.

Nice job!

Thank you!

A wonderful story, I loved every moment of it!

Thanks, I'm glad!

niiice sexy too in it's own way

Thank you, I'd like to think so!

Well, I'm far too late to this party, but boy did I love reading this nonetheless~ The cartoon wackiness of it all is just a thrill, and it's always fun seeing someone as pompous as Trixie being forced into these silly scenarios. I'll be looking forward to reading any more of these stories~

Why, thank you!