Life in a Small Town
Howdy do, y’all; this here’s Nickelback Nathan again. It’s been a while since we last let y’all know what’s goin’ on down here in Arizona, hasn’t it? Yup. Ain’t much goin’ on down here. Ain’t much to be goin’ on down here neither. We’re just y’all’s typical small town that looks outdated but it ain’t; we’s keepin’ up with them modern times. As for those Wildcat City folks, y’all’d think they’d do the same. They weren’t until Leo the Patriotic Lion got hit. Then them heartless creatures destroyed Earth. It’s a good thing that Zanta critter let his world be the world we went to for a while, and it’s a good thing he kindly bought us all them vacation homes that were our temporary homes during that time. Mine’s in Arbordale, the same town where we first met Alex. What a joy he is, ain’t he?
Contrary to what you folks might think since Wildcat City had been outdated all them decades, allow me to let y’all in on one little secret. There’s three towns actin’ like this: us, Hicksburg, Texas; and the district in Wildcat City called Horseshoeville. They look outdated to preserve tradition of the Wild West, but they aren’t entirely that way. Folks tend to think Horseshoeville was the first town to do it. Well, it ain’t them. It ain’t Hicksburg neither. It’s us. Yup. We’s the first. Not them other two. We’s the first.
And them reasons why we’s the first is probably because we’re located pretty much out in all them sticks. It’s a nice place to be if y’all prefer the farmin’ life like I do, and y’all don’t give a care ’bout them technological gadgets that allegedly are corruptin’ them educational systems and people involved in them. Y’all be the judge of that. I’m just tellin’ y’all what I’ve believed, but I’m prayin’ I ain’t a victim of that there phenomenon known as groupthink. But that thing sometimes happens in farm communities like ours. We all tend to think the same way and don’t challenge nobody. (I got a feelin’ I am, ’cause I did have one of them outbursts similar to him. When Gentleman 13 first struck, I screamed, “It ain’t ethical to be rich!” I said that because our town had a problem with millionaires linked to crimes, and the folks started sayin’ they’d rather be poor than rich.)
When y’all in a town like ours that has roughly between two hundred and five thousand, and we got about 3,209, I believe, as of last year, pretty much everybody knows everybody else, and sometimes their business. Y’all got your guy that’s the town drunk, for instance. I mean, our city doesn’t have an alcohol problem though it ain’t illegal (because look what happened with Prohibition), but in small towns, there’s always that one specific feller that is always that there obvious standout from all them others. Plus, it ain’t legal to do any of them moonshine stills or somethin’, though we ain’t had a still since 1949. Or was it 1969? I can’t remember. All I do know is that part of it is all that global fear of Leo the Patriotic Lion that ain’t never gonna stop. I feel for him. I really do.
Yet the simple life is a life I appreciate the best. It’s nice to socialize with folks in person, make some music with him (my friends and I formed our own bluegrass group, although we can also play some of them blues tunes and country music as well), and enjoy the sunshine during a long, hard day’s work of farm chores and duties. This differs from y’all city folks, whom, accordin’ to all them rumors I’ve been a-hearin’, can’t put down them phones long enough to even see where y’all’s driving them cars. We don’t drive no automobiles down here; we’s still a-ridin’ horses or walkin’ to all them practical places like schools, the bank, restaurant, pharmacy, general store, home, etc. But y’all might just well prove them wrong and actually use practical reasons for them things. I just never hear about it.
Anyway, there’s just a brief thought for y’all to ponder.
THE END
Eterna and characters plus Gentleman 13 (C)
Zanta Keplicus (Zanta) and used with his permission
Howdy do, y’all; this here’s Nickelback Nathan again. It’s been a while since we last let y’all know what’s goin’ on down here in Arizona, hasn’t it? Yup. Ain’t much goin’ on down here. Ain’t much to be goin’ on down here neither. We’re just y’all’s typical small town that looks outdated but it ain’t; we’s keepin’ up with them modern times. As for those Wildcat City folks, y’all’d think they’d do the same. They weren’t until Leo the Patriotic Lion got hit. Then them heartless creatures destroyed Earth. It’s a good thing that Zanta critter let his world be the world we went to for a while, and it’s a good thing he kindly bought us all them vacation homes that were our temporary homes during that time. Mine’s in Arbordale, the same town where we first met Alex. What a joy he is, ain’t he?
Contrary to what you folks might think since Wildcat City had been outdated all them decades, allow me to let y’all in on one little secret. There’s three towns actin’ like this: us, Hicksburg, Texas; and the district in Wildcat City called Horseshoeville. They look outdated to preserve tradition of the Wild West, but they aren’t entirely that way. Folks tend to think Horseshoeville was the first town to do it. Well, it ain’t them. It ain’t Hicksburg neither. It’s us. Yup. We’s the first. Not them other two. We’s the first.
And them reasons why we’s the first is probably because we’re located pretty much out in all them sticks. It’s a nice place to be if y’all prefer the farmin’ life like I do, and y’all don’t give a care ’bout them technological gadgets that allegedly are corruptin’ them educational systems and people involved in them. Y’all be the judge of that. I’m just tellin’ y’all what I’ve believed, but I’m prayin’ I ain’t a victim of that there phenomenon known as groupthink. But that thing sometimes happens in farm communities like ours. We all tend to think the same way and don’t challenge nobody. (I got a feelin’ I am, ’cause I did have one of them outbursts similar to him. When Gentleman 13 first struck, I screamed, “It ain’t ethical to be rich!” I said that because our town had a problem with millionaires linked to crimes, and the folks started sayin’ they’d rather be poor than rich.)
When y’all in a town like ours that has roughly between two hundred and five thousand, and we got about 3,209, I believe, as of last year, pretty much everybody knows everybody else, and sometimes their business. Y’all got your guy that’s the town drunk, for instance. I mean, our city doesn’t have an alcohol problem though it ain’t illegal (because look what happened with Prohibition), but in small towns, there’s always that one specific feller that is always that there obvious standout from all them others. Plus, it ain’t legal to do any of them moonshine stills or somethin’, though we ain’t had a still since 1949. Or was it 1969? I can’t remember. All I do know is that part of it is all that global fear of Leo the Patriotic Lion that ain’t never gonna stop. I feel for him. I really do.
Yet the simple life is a life I appreciate the best. It’s nice to socialize with folks in person, make some music with him (my friends and I formed our own bluegrass group, although we can also play some of them blues tunes and country music as well), and enjoy the sunshine during a long, hard day’s work of farm chores and duties. This differs from y’all city folks, whom, accordin’ to all them rumors I’ve been a-hearin’, can’t put down them phones long enough to even see where y’all’s driving them cars. We don’t drive no automobiles down here; we’s still a-ridin’ horses or walkin’ to all them practical places like schools, the bank, restaurant, pharmacy, general store, home, etc. But y’all might just well prove them wrong and actually use practical reasons for them things. I just never hear about it.
Anyway, there’s just a brief thought for y’all to ponder.
THE END
Eterna and characters plus Gentleman 13 (C)
Zanta Keplicus (Zanta) and used with his permission
Category Story / All
Species Unspecified / Any
Size 120 x 120px
File Size 39 kB
Listed in Folders
Larry: Don't blame me if someone decides to get drunk on my beer. Some people will always drink beer but its entirely their fault if they get drunk. In this day and age, one good beer is only needed for a day to satisfy a person if they choose to drink beer. Me, I make beer in the name of science because of its alternative uses if people aren't going to drink it. For example, you can use flat beer to polish wood furniture and your town has a lot of them. Check this out. *dips rag in bowl of flat beer before polishing a wooden cabinet with it until its shiny and new looking* Just like that! Your wooden cabinet looks all good and new just like the day when it was just created!
Zax: There's a saying that goes like this; if its used to clean another object, then it shouldn't be consumed to clean one's self from the inside. Beer has been used as wood polisher so that's another reason why one shouldn't drink more than one of that stuff. We UN1024s don't drink that stuff anyways.
Chuong: If towns want to be dry towns, or towns with limited restriction on alcohol during a certain day, I have no problem with that. Prohibition may be a failure but last time I checked, any place in America can restrict the sales of alcohol during a certain time or day.
Zax: Like Texas! Every Sunday, stores cannot sell alcohol. Yet, bars can.
Jack: Can we say some of the aftereffects of prohibition are the dry states or towns then? If so, at least prohibition left a legacy to remember for better and worse.
Zax: Yup! Even though people will always sell alcohol, at least there will be certain days where they can't. I guess you can say America found a happy medium to a degree. And I have no problems with the cowboy towns in Arizona and Texas keeping their traditions. They're cowboy towns after all.
Larry: I have no problem with the Americans choosing certain places to be designated as dry places. Because after all, I wanted to create beer to prove that those who see my beer as a good drink can also have good alternative uses to those who don't drink. No one is going to stop me from producing my kegs anyways. Too bad Bendraqi keeps snagging my kegs off the cargo ships hence I keep getting angry letters from my importers about their products not arriving on time. And many of those importers use my beer to create useful things like shampoo and soap along with brass polisher.
Jack: I had fun teaching my fellow Marines on using beer as a less messy alternative to Brasso when it comes to cleaning brass belt buckles.
Zax: And I had fun teaching my fellow Army men on using beer to clean their gun parts in an efficient way too.
Chuong: My country makes beer but they are owned by the people and the government. With so many people refusing to drink beer these days, my government has been talking about completely privatizing their beer companies and taking the remnants of their beer products to turn them into cleaners for our troops. Beer makes an excellent stain remover on brass and other metal objects like gun parts. Plus, conventional tarnish remover is messy and expensive compared to using beer as the alternative!
Zhou/Jake: And that's how we keep it clean; find an alternative use for alcohol so people can't get drunk! Creativity at its finest!
Zax: There's a saying that goes like this; if its used to clean another object, then it shouldn't be consumed to clean one's self from the inside. Beer has been used as wood polisher so that's another reason why one shouldn't drink more than one of that stuff. We UN1024s don't drink that stuff anyways.
Chuong: If towns want to be dry towns, or towns with limited restriction on alcohol during a certain day, I have no problem with that. Prohibition may be a failure but last time I checked, any place in America can restrict the sales of alcohol during a certain time or day.
Zax: Like Texas! Every Sunday, stores cannot sell alcohol. Yet, bars can.
Jack: Can we say some of the aftereffects of prohibition are the dry states or towns then? If so, at least prohibition left a legacy to remember for better and worse.
Zax: Yup! Even though people will always sell alcohol, at least there will be certain days where they can't. I guess you can say America found a happy medium to a degree. And I have no problems with the cowboy towns in Arizona and Texas keeping their traditions. They're cowboy towns after all.
Larry: I have no problem with the Americans choosing certain places to be designated as dry places. Because after all, I wanted to create beer to prove that those who see my beer as a good drink can also have good alternative uses to those who don't drink. No one is going to stop me from producing my kegs anyways. Too bad Bendraqi keeps snagging my kegs off the cargo ships hence I keep getting angry letters from my importers about their products not arriving on time. And many of those importers use my beer to create useful things like shampoo and soap along with brass polisher.
Jack: I had fun teaching my fellow Marines on using beer as a less messy alternative to Brasso when it comes to cleaning brass belt buckles.
Zax: And I had fun teaching my fellow Army men on using beer to clean their gun parts in an efficient way too.
Chuong: My country makes beer but they are owned by the people and the government. With so many people refusing to drink beer these days, my government has been talking about completely privatizing their beer companies and taking the remnants of their beer products to turn them into cleaners for our troops. Beer makes an excellent stain remover on brass and other metal objects like gun parts. Plus, conventional tarnish remover is messy and expensive compared to using beer as the alternative!
Zhou/Jake: And that's how we keep it clean; find an alternative use for alcohol so people can't get drunk! Creativity at its finest!
Nathan: I ain't judgin' nobody 'bout beer drinkin'; that's their problem. It ain't my business.
Luke: That's amazing that you were able to take beer and use it for something else. We like that.
Outlaw: And y'all can say the truth when you say we are a dry town. We also had a period where we tried to make gambling illegal as an experiment, but that just turned out as disastrous as Prohibition.
Jocko: Tribe forbid drinking, but praise you for finding alternatives. Well done, Larry.
Warrior Wolf: Astonishing. Maybe now, we'll have less cases of drunkards at last.
Miss Jamie: Especially since my saloon sells sarsaparilla, which is safe to drink. Say, you boys want one? They're half-price today.
Luke: That's amazing that you were able to take beer and use it for something else. We like that.
Outlaw: And y'all can say the truth when you say we are a dry town. We also had a period where we tried to make gambling illegal as an experiment, but that just turned out as disastrous as Prohibition.
Jocko: Tribe forbid drinking, but praise you for finding alternatives. Well done, Larry.
Warrior Wolf: Astonishing. Maybe now, we'll have less cases of drunkards at last.
Miss Jamie: Especially since my saloon sells sarsaparilla, which is safe to drink. Say, you boys want one? They're half-price today.
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