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Life's A Chibi: Wishful Need
"Remember the time you were young and you stood outside the window of your favorite toy store, your eyes locked on something that you wish you can have; your hands pressed against the glass, your eyes solidly focused on that toy you wanted, your mind coming up with happy moments of you playing with that toy. The need to claim ownership of it was high that you would do anything just to have it: extra chores around the house, good grades, reading extra books, helping out a bit more, and offering to shovel snow or mow your neighbors yard. Bit by bit, you earned enough money so you could buy that dream toy you desperately wanted. In most cases, you would get it and you were filled with happiness.
"Now, with you becoming an adult, your constant drive for toys decreases and is replaced with something else you wish to have - a companion. You find someone cute, charming, funny and most likely available. You eye him more often than anyone else. You think about him more than you think about yourself. He is much like that toy you had been obsessing over when you were younger. And like that toy, there was thick invisible barrier between you two. Very slowly, you became his friend and got to know him a bit more. You hung out with him, met his friends, go to gathering and clubs with him, kept in contact with him through phone and computer. You were working hard to obtain his trust and friendship without coming off as too desperate or strong. You were hoping, that one day, that invisible barrier would be gone and you would obtain him.
"But what if you found out that he was already claimed by someone else. That or the realization that distance and/or money became an issue. Something else, besides that wall of invisible glass, was blocking you from the person you wished to be your companion. Your 'toy' was 'sold out' or is 'no longer in production'. You missed your chance to get him. You still kept in contact with him as often as you could. Your friendship doesn't break even though he is now out of your reach. You hide the fact that you wish that you could have "claim" him for yourself and wanted to be closer to him. A few hints slip out here and there about the need for him to be by your side, but you respect him too much to break any ties you have with him.
"Now and then, in the back of your mind, you wish you could be with him - an obsession still lingers within your mind. A part of you wish that something will happen that will make him yours. You find yourself buying trinkets and other objects that remind you of him. You and your friends remain you that there are other fish in the sea and that, one day, you will find someone. As true as that sounds, you still wish you could have snagged that one fish, that unique and special 'toy', that got away."
artwork © 2014 Alex Cockburn
"Now, with you becoming an adult, your constant drive for toys decreases and is replaced with something else you wish to have - a companion. You find someone cute, charming, funny and most likely available. You eye him more often than anyone else. You think about him more than you think about yourself. He is much like that toy you had been obsessing over when you were younger. And like that toy, there was thick invisible barrier between you two. Very slowly, you became his friend and got to know him a bit more. You hung out with him, met his friends, go to gathering and clubs with him, kept in contact with him through phone and computer. You were working hard to obtain his trust and friendship without coming off as too desperate or strong. You were hoping, that one day, that invisible barrier would be gone and you would obtain him.
"But what if you found out that he was already claimed by someone else. That or the realization that distance and/or money became an issue. Something else, besides that wall of invisible glass, was blocking you from the person you wished to be your companion. Your 'toy' was 'sold out' or is 'no longer in production'. You missed your chance to get him. You still kept in contact with him as often as you could. Your friendship doesn't break even though he is now out of your reach. You hide the fact that you wish that you could have "claim" him for yourself and wanted to be closer to him. A few hints slip out here and there about the need for him to be by your side, but you respect him too much to break any ties you have with him.
"Now and then, in the back of your mind, you wish you could be with him - an obsession still lingers within your mind. A part of you wish that something will happen that will make him yours. You find yourself buying trinkets and other objects that remind you of him. You and your friends remain you that there are other fish in the sea and that, one day, you will find someone. As true as that sounds, you still wish you could have snagged that one fish, that unique and special 'toy', that got away."
artwork © 2014 Alex Cockburn
Category All / All
Species Unspecified / Any
Size 763 x 686px
File Size 317.6 kB
Listed in Folders
Mmm, just came out a situation like this. An old childhood friend and I have been seeing each other again since half a year or so after I couldn't manage to keep in touch with her for several years due to mental issues I've suffered from.
And here I was, having had a crush on her back when we were teenagers but never having the stones to admit it to her and now, after all this time I had build up enough confidence to ask her but not having had a chance yet to get to know the older version of her. And to find during that whole process that she was already with someone else..
And well.. I couldn't have possibly expressed it better than your last paragraph, those are exactly the feelings I've had, have and no doubt will face for a while to come.
And here I was, having had a crush on her back when we were teenagers but never having the stones to admit it to her and now, after all this time I had build up enough confidence to ask her but not having had a chance yet to get to know the older version of her. And to find during that whole process that she was already with someone else..
And well.. I couldn't have possibly expressed it better than your last paragraph, those are exactly the feelings I've had, have and no doubt will face for a while to come.
Tis better to have loved and lost. Than to have never loved at all. . . Every love, every bond, it's what adds to the kaleidoscope of a life. When someone inspires us to be our better selves - honor it by being the best you that you can be. I truly believe that there is many ways to love someone. So love the one that got away but remember to keep your heart open to love again. It's amazing how the heart can grow and encompass more love everyday if you let it. *hugs*
I know this feeling. It's happened to me a couple times with some women I've talked to. It's hard when you find out that the life you wanted with him/her will never happen... but you get through it... you can never know true victory without first tasting the bitter agony of defeat.
This happenef to me five years ago and still not over it, ive written it down here. Im still sad about it. http://www.furaffinity.net/view/8756233/
Sometimes your art hits soooo close to home T^T
....
and there go the waterworks
On the other hand though, nice piece. The description make s it hit so much harder... but in a complimentary way... I don't know, how do you describes something that does it's job of evoking emotion without saying in a good way? namely because it's not a happy feeling but the combination of art + story just fit so well together.
[/drunk_but_those_feels_though_rant]
....
and there go the waterworks
On the other hand though, nice piece. The description make s it hit so much harder... but in a complimentary way... I don't know, how do you describes something that does it's job of evoking emotion without saying in a good way? namely because it's not a happy feeling but the combination of art + story just fit so well together.
[/drunk_but_those_feels_though_rant]
I hate one moment in life.
We might as well be listening to this awe read this..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4N3N1MlvVc4
We might as well be listening to this awe read this..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4N3N1MlvVc4
I love your work so much hun... so so much. Not only do you have the ability to make eye catching amazing images, so cute, some sexy... all around amazing art... but you also have this ability to write so beautifully... you really draw me in and get me to feel what I assume you felt when creating this submission. Its a talent I envy and very happy that you share it with us ^^
Really... you are amazing <33
Really... you are amazing <33
realy true...such a sad fealing losing the one you love the most.I lost a love that was so especial to me she was the reason i could get up with a smile smileevery day....its been 2 years but still to this day the sorrow from that goodbye stills resides in my heart
....today that same sorrow,sadness of knowing that someone i hoped that could be someone i could love and love me back will not happen. I smille outside to her but inside i just tear up...
trully a human heart is fragil it dosen't thake much to crush it
Another great work! the art and the description fits that fealing quite perfectly
....today that same sorrow,sadness of knowing that someone i hoped that could be someone i could love and love me back will not happen. I smille outside to her but inside i just tear up...
trully a human heart is fragil it dosen't thake much to crush it
Another great work! the art and the description fits that fealing quite perfectly
Because of recent things that happened..This really made me cry. But this is so beautiful in its depressing way, a lovely block of text that will now haunt me every day. Thank you for making this even though it made me sad, it's how my mind feels in words that I could not form on my own. And thank you 
for putting this in your Skype status, I probably would have never found this any other way.
for putting this in your Skype status, I probably would have never found this any other way. 
With having "Asperger's Syndrome" and it being practically impossible for me to date, I can relate to this picture 105%. Another words, --> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V7iEQIlFfGo
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