Furry's date furry's. For about 2 years max. Then its off to Manhunt/Bear411/Biggercity/(anothergaydatingsite) for the next 30 years of your life.
Gl hf.

I love you for your optimism. :3

Haha, I love you too Kito <3
Stay strong Babe.

Or you could just do what i did and give up on furries after 2 months, manhunt/biggercity after 6 months, and spend the rest of your life alone.

I probably should stay out of this discussion. Being furry has never affected my RL relationships. I don't think I could handle a online/long-distance relationship. >_<

Falling in love with someone's avatar would most certainly lead to awful results. When one eventually meets this person in real life, they're not meeting a "Handsome loner fox with devilishly cute eyes" or whatnot; they're meeting a very real human being with very real flaws. If someone were to try and enter into a relationship and expect nothing less than one's ideal self-image, that relationship is destined for failure.

I think falling for a fursona can be a bad thing - generally a fursona is what we want to be - a perfect version of ourselves. My fursona is outgoing, rarely shy, outdoorsy and isn't afraid to be herself. Me? often shy, I warm up to people once I get to know them better or I'm with outgoing friends, I want to be outside more but rarely get the time or I sit on the internet because I'm lazy :P I only wear baggy clothes despite loving some of the more revealing stuff (and by that I mean simple things like shorts, skirts etc) but I feel too revealed in them (not an issue with weight etc, I just feel insecure and think people are looking at me too much)

Fursona's can also be far closer of course, but as a general, I think most are what we want to be and this has to be kept in mind when finding someone. Afterall, not everyone is going to be your type even if their fursona is, this includes personality and other aspects.

Well, its pretty much like having a crush on an anime toon (or even celebs). If you take it to seriously it can get pretty bad. Ive found peoples avatars/furrsonnas/pursonnas many asortments of things from sexy to fugly from cute to.. whichever would be opposite of cute XD Haha. Its like reading a book and getting attached to the characters there, i think that if you take these crushes too seriously it would lead to obvious false thinking about the owner of the creature.

Any form of avatar created by a person is usually what they want to be. thats sort of how it works for a lot of people (not all, but many) If you are falling for the 'perfect' characteristics of avatars created by someone else, thhen finding someone to rival that level would be hard and may impair you when trying to find a loved one in real life.

Everyone is adaptable, its just the will power to adapt to looking for a human mate rather then fawning over your dream fursonna/anime character/ character in a book, etc.

Well, I know people who come from both sides of the spectrum here; whom will either fall for the fursona and then or then no the person OR people who will fall for the person before the fursona.

I do have quite a few friends who will still fall for the person even if all they like is the fursona; and in turn close their eyes during many parts of intimacy due to them having more sexual or physical attraction to the fursona and not the person; and imagine themselves as the fursona; instead. In my case; I can say that I fell for the fursona of my mate first, but was lucky for him to turn out decent and very cute; unlike some furries I know whom hide behind a vast array of thin, cute, girly fursonas and they themselves are fat, ugly, gross, unkempt and in DIRE need of someone to hold a mirror up to them and say "change or GTFO".

I think honestly, that leads to disaster. You need to kknow the person BEHIND it.

My mate and I have been together for almost 9 years now, becuase:

A: We know each other as people, not our fursonas

B: we are accepting of each others faults. Kahuki has faults, but so do i. We try to work on them, but accept them.

These by far are intrinsic to a working relationship

It seems most people agree: this question presupposes a falsity.

This comment is mindblowing for some reason.

It might be the best comment I've ever seen, ever.

I dunno if that was sarcasm or not, but it's cool regardless.

Thankyou?

Not at all.

I wish I could just stop people mid argument and calmly say "The question presupposed a falsity" and just walk away and everyone go "Yeah, my bad." and be happy forever and ever.

To be honest, I fell for a combination of my fiancee, 's personality as well as her fursona's looks. But she's one of the people that designed her character off of her, and always acts like herself.

I can't speak for people that fall for falsified, acted characters and things that don't look like their player counterparts. The best bet is that it'd probably lead to a few issues, but who knows; love for the person normally could potentially follow. It's really a per-case topic. :]

FFFFF I'm half asleep and none of this will probably come out right but okay. Here we go. TALKING.

I knew what my fiance looked like before I knew what his fursona looked like. I knew what he was all about before I was fairly sure what SPECIES his fursona was. However, he knew what my character looked like before I would even show myself to him, and the first time he really got a GOOD look at me is when I tackled him in a Burger King parking lot while his back was turned.

Which, I guess my character was a fairly accurate representation of me, just as his turned out to be a pretty accurate representation of him. I guess it's possible to fall for the person based on their fursona if said fursona was made to be some sort of literal, cross-species translation of themselves. Unless, for some reason, somebody's just drawn toward it because of the allure of the species.

However, most people I know don't have characters like this. They have super hyped-up, idealized characters of what they WANT to be instead of WHAT they are. I guess falling for somebody who hides behind the facade of freakin' ADONIS is a lie, but apparently it's worked out for SOME people.

So, yeah. I guess it goes by a case-by-case basis, how honest somebody is, and if somebody takes the time to get to know the person BEHIND the fursona before jumping headlong into a relationship thinking, "I'M GONNA BE GETTIN' SO MUCH HERMAPHRODITE DRAGON LOVE."

It is never a wise idea to fall so in love with a fantasy that you forget that it IS still a fantasy.

As one who tends to live with one foot lodged in fantasy, its something I had to remind myself of quite often, no matter how much I was lost in bliss in the moment. I've developed feelings for several fursona's over the years who have usually turned into long-term friends as I've gotten to know the people behind the characters, but I've never let it get to that love stage... save once.

... and I got my heart broken in less than two weeks time when the person behind the fursona showed his real side.

The majority of my RL dating has usually been outside of the furry fandom, and the times (including currently) when I have dated in the fandom, it was with people that I met IRL before I ever met their fursona.

I have never found a fursona to fall in love with and I won't. I'd rather know the persona than the fursona because you can be a fox female but then be a lecherous male in real life. Luckily my fiance wasn't such when I met him and his fursona was a definite depiction of himself. My character Hina is a good reflection of myself even though she isn't my fursona (not really a furfag).

I'm not entirely sure I fit in this as I don't have any character I call a 'fursona' (and likely I never will either.) but I do have a tale to tell.

One time a now ex-friend and I used to RP scenarios. It was fun for a time but he got really attached to one of my characters; to the point where he said "If she were real I'd marry her." Now understand that hearing that is creepy as hell but I just shrugged it off; figured he was just being silly.

Well he was being dead serious, to the point where the character was all he cared about. I'll admit my actions during that time were far from great as well, to the point were I used that character like an object. Things went south from there and eventually the arguments became too much.

I blocked him and decided not to bother with him from then on because of how verbally abusive he was and how he focused more on fantasy than reality.

Now as to the question of how this affects people when seeking out a potential love in RL. I think this focus on fantasy is highly damaging in such and one needs to mentally know how to separate fantasy from reality.

That said I DO NOT want to seek a love from the fandom at all; not no way not no how. I'd like to focus on real local people I can physically date tyvm.

Also to add this isn't the whole story; there are a lot of very fine details missing, but for privacy sake (for both me and ex-friend) those have been left out on purpose.

I leave my "furry" on the internet. Never had a problem.

Same here.

I personally have never experienced this. I am extremely fortunate to have found the love of my life Syntaxx in college, and we just happened to be interested in the furry scene. We didn't even talk about it until after we started dating.

But I would assume that falling for someone's fursona can be very damaging to the relationship. I think it's better to know the persona first and accept the fursona later. But ya know...it's already been said...so I will scuttle off now =3 *scuttlescuttle*

Yeah... Justin and I met at college too. =3 Now true that one of the reasons we started talking was because I wore a tail up until a year ago (2 and 1/2 years after having met him and falling for him) I didn't even know he had a fursona. O_o;


Just relating to you, Bianka, is all. I have never known anyone to fall in love with a fursona and then engage in a relationship with the person behind it. It's usually the other way around.

Yeah, we knew each other for a year without ever knowing about their...I guess furriness lol! Then we started dating and it went from there. hehe

Isn't it funny how it just somehow worked out with us? lol

It did work out incredibly well. BTW, off topic, but did you get my reply to the journal about your poor puppy on LJ?

Oh yes! I replied to it quite a while ago, but I don't think LJ really tells you that. Thanks so much for that info! It's really hepful!

"ZOMG your herm fursona with e-cup boobs and 2 foot penis is friggeing hot!!!!!"

that sums it all

i guess my opinion might as well be invalid, since i prefer to find partners outside of the furry fandom generally. i've had partners in the furry fandom, but i didn't fall in love with their avatars necessarily; but i also have to get to know a person first to have any attraction to them. i may grow to "love" their avatar, simply because it's the visual/internet representation of a person i also happen to love.
but for the sake of debate, i'll stretch "relationships" to more than just sexual/romantic partners - friendships and the like.

now, granted, i may be more or less apt to start talking to a person - and thus possibly get to know them and possibly love - due to their avatar. a persona that's relevant to my interests is going to make me curious to at least check out that person, and a persona that stands out to me is going to at least nab my attention. a persona that is dull and generic to me is, of course, going to make me far more likely to pass over that person.
it won't make me completely turn away a person, of course; someone with a boring-looking avatar could turn out to be a fantastic person, and someone with an amazing avatar might be a shallow douchebag.

and for this, i won't say i'm entirely unbiased. i'm possibly even sort of an elitist dick sometimes. obviously someone that has an avatar that appeals to me is going to automatically seem more interesting; and in the case of many that i do find appealing, i tend to automatically regard that person higher, because i figure if they have the insight/creativity/meaning to put into such a creature, they surely must be an intelligent and interesting person. and someone that has a generic fox #12 avatar is more likely to be a boring and uninspired person.
on the same token too, i automatically tend to veer away from folks with avatars that clearly display interests i'd rather little to nothing to do with - hyper herms and the like.
i know this is not always true, it's been disproved to me before, but i still can't help but think it.

as far as my personal relationships go, i've never at least made partners with anyone because of their avatar, but again i don't date exclusively furries either. i guess most of my partners that have had avatars pretty much made them because they were with me, or because i had to draw them as something. :P

I've tried both sides, and neither last longer than three months... Nearly hooked up with another guy, got to know him really well, and then he said life's to busy for a relationship. Gave up on him... Of course tried the online one, but for some reason, I tend to lose intrest.

My first boyfriend was a furry, and he noticed me one halloween day at school, I was a freshman in high school and he was a junior. Three months later, we broke up... Since then I had two normal guys, second one was worth it, and the third was just a guy looking for a dominatrix...

I need to go to college, it seems lots of people are finding good mates there...

I'm not a furry so I don't have to worry about it :D

lol@furfans X3

lol I'm not that much of a furfan tho :D

I still find it amazing that non-furs manage to maintain accounts on fur sites. :P

it seems almost, contradictory. :3

Yea, but people on DA won't buy my porn :D;;

I truthfully got tired of the fandom, really. Look through my gallery and the beginning of my gallery is full of multiple fursonas of mine, but now I'm just dealing with a persona instead. :/ The yiffing and murring became rather irritating to me, and I've seen a lot of furries who seem to don't know how to separate reality from the fandom. Getting comments like "Eww human art" is rather troubling to me o.o;;; But I suppose to each their own D:

I never got into the RP and sex side of the fandom... it actually bored me believe it or not. Hell I don't even draw sex scenes unless my watchers badger me about it.

I'm in it for the art and anthropomorphic musculature/skeletal concepts. I find it a wonderfully open ended subject to apply just about any emotive atmosphere imaginable. :P

Just something that hasn't been too terribly overdone in the past. A topic free of most "art snobs" of the present.

Yea, it's a shame that porn is pretty much fueling the fire to this fandom, but in my case I have to draw it to get views and money for college D:

lol, isn't that the truth. the only time I've drawn it is when I wanted more watchers or views X3

Btw thank you much for the watch, I think I'll return the favor :3

lol no prob! Thanks for the watch back! :D

It doesn't affect me at all, I'm already mated.

But, it does affect pretty near every furry RP'er, especially when you find out the hot vixen ain't a female!

Fursonae has to carry a piece of the personae, there's no way around that. You just have to keep in mind that if you're roleplaying a character, that the name you see on the screen belongs to someone who is also roleplaying a character. Yep, darned hard to keep 'em apart! Turn the monitor off and sit back from it, stare at it as the two characters disappear and the monitor and keyboard reappear, and welcome yourself back to reality. Then dive in again, reality's no fun!

I could not have any form of relationship (mate, relative, pack member) with one who is a furry online only! I don't mean the appearance, because certainly can't be represented accurately in an image, but the perception and behaviour. Furry online only = clown...

The appearance can be compromised with a fursuit...

i am mated (as in soul mate) to a wonderful otter. my first try....my first boyfriend, my first time, al lthat good stuff. we've been together a full year, and the heat hasn't ever subsided for a moment. we where meant to be together, i believe this is one of those times where fursonas picked each other. i fell in love with his mind long before the body.
sorry if incoherent, loopy from pills. and fever atm.

On the whole, I feel like there's allot of pressure in the fandom to date WITHIN the fandom. There's both a sense of fetishist loyalty and a fog of social phobia that I think are unnecessary. Having a thing for animal people isn't at a base level really all that strange, considering we ARE ANIMALS, and there's been an anthropomorphic movement since ancient times.

Maybe I'm not the standard in this, but I've been in the fandom since I was 13... I've only ever had one boyfriend that was actually in the fandom. All the other boys (and girls) were always ok with it, but with no internet presence in it. I found I kind of like to keep it that way. Having two people actively in the fandom can be a real drama magnet, unless one of them is very low key.

Because everyone knows everything about everyone else in the furry fandom, whenever there's a fight, a friendship disaster, a bad break-up or something there's usually a great ripple effect in the lining of the fandom, friendships are questioned, sides are taken, someone invariably draws hate-art. I kind of feel like that's because the internet has different social rules than "real life" and people do things on the internet they'd NEVER do in "real life." I think that with good "real life" manners and a good reality check now and then, that's something we could rise above as a genre.

well I find my self in the I have say I always fall for them but I care more about personality like evenif there fursona is female and there male rl if they end getting close I wont care I fell in love by personality imo falling in love by personality> then looks. besides I wouldnt care when I meet them I will always see them as there fursona. ^_^ oh btw a fello furry that I can relate to is > then a rich super model

Easy, hope that you meet a therian.

As for me, yes, I will admit that I have fell for a fursona once or twice. But I have realized that they are masks, often times to hide insecurities. So, I tend to avoid maintaining an intimate relationship with anyone over the net. I look for a great person irl, and if she is a furry, great, if not, then she must come to grips with the fact that I'm a furry or it won't go any farther.

"wait..... you're NOT a 12 foot tall hypermuscular intersex anthro wolf??? YOU LYING SLUT!!!"