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Courageously Cuddle Where No Furry Has Friendshipped Before
A sequel to: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10163842/
Dear Princess Celestia,
Hello again! It's me, your friendly neighborhood pony-napper, the Cockblocker once again. No, I did not kidnap anypony... this time. Instead, I have brought a friend of mine here because, to be frank, everyone wants to buck apples with the silly pony.
No, not Pinkie Pie, but good guess.
APPLEJACK!
Now, I know we have had our differences... what with the 72-hour standoff at Sweet Apple Acres, the entire legion of Royal Guard being called in, and the hundreds of thousands of Bits such a debacle cost your tax-paying ponies from the destruction caused by your sister being up three days straight without sleep and in her hallucinatory state, felt the need to drink her body weight in nectar because she thought she was a humming bird...
...I'm just digging myself deeper, aren't I?
Anyway, I wanted you to know that despite all the wanted posters, I am here on a mission of Friendship. Yes, you read that right, FRIENDSHIP! My friend Victor and I are here in Equestria to Courageously Cuddle Where No Furry Has Friendshipped Before! I am going to make it up to Miss Apple by giving her all the hugs and cuddles that would cause the crazy unicorn with a harp Cutie Mark who wouldn't let go of my hands once the guards had me in custody to go into a fit of jealous rage. And she's going to like 'em, darn it! There's no such thing as personal space–or restraining orders–when friendship is involved!
So here's wishing me luck, Princess Celestia! If Discord can be given a second chance, then so can I!
Signed, Your Friendly Neighborhood Pony-Hugger...
The Cockblocker
P.S. Please don't ask what I had to do to get Spike to send this Friendship Report for me... trust me, even I feel dirty. I have no clue what he wants to do with that saddle and crop with a purple diamond Cutie Mark and I sure as Tartarus don't want to know!
P.P.S. Tell Luna I'm sorry. I do hope her mane grew back after that dive she took into that barber shop, thinking the mirrors were more of her humming bird flock. Sure, Rarity got to add authentic ethereal chords to some of her limited edition works but it looked better on Princess Luna's head.
P.P.P.S. If Vic and I bake you a cake, will you PLEASE take down the wanted posters?
Maverik is Copyrighted MaveriKat
Victor is Copyrighted Born Victim
http://www.furaffinity.net/user/bornvictim
Applejack is Copyrighted Hasbro
www.hasbro.com
Art is Copyrighted Andy Price
http://andypriceart.deviantart.com/
Dear Princess Celestia,
Hello again! It's me, your friendly neighborhood pony-napper, the Cockblocker once again. No, I did not kidnap anypony... this time. Instead, I have brought a friend of mine here because, to be frank, everyone wants to buck apples with the silly pony.
No, not Pinkie Pie, but good guess.
APPLEJACK!
Now, I know we have had our differences... what with the 72-hour standoff at Sweet Apple Acres, the entire legion of Royal Guard being called in, and the hundreds of thousands of Bits such a debacle cost your tax-paying ponies from the destruction caused by your sister being up three days straight without sleep and in her hallucinatory state, felt the need to drink her body weight in nectar because she thought she was a humming bird...
...I'm just digging myself deeper, aren't I?
Anyway, I wanted you to know that despite all the wanted posters, I am here on a mission of Friendship. Yes, you read that right, FRIENDSHIP! My friend Victor and I are here in Equestria to Courageously Cuddle Where No Furry Has Friendshipped Before! I am going to make it up to Miss Apple by giving her all the hugs and cuddles that would cause the crazy unicorn with a harp Cutie Mark who wouldn't let go of my hands once the guards had me in custody to go into a fit of jealous rage. And she's going to like 'em, darn it! There's no such thing as personal space–or restraining orders–when friendship is involved!
So here's wishing me luck, Princess Celestia! If Discord can be given a second chance, then so can I!
Signed, Your Friendly Neighborhood Pony-Hugger...
The Cockblocker
P.S. Please don't ask what I had to do to get Spike to send this Friendship Report for me... trust me, even I feel dirty. I have no clue what he wants to do with that saddle and crop with a purple diamond Cutie Mark and I sure as Tartarus don't want to know!
P.P.S. Tell Luna I'm sorry. I do hope her mane grew back after that dive she took into that barber shop, thinking the mirrors were more of her humming bird flock. Sure, Rarity got to add authentic ethereal chords to some of her limited edition works but it looked better on Princess Luna's head.
P.P.P.S. If Vic and I bake you a cake, will you PLEASE take down the wanted posters?
Maverik is Copyrighted MaveriKat
Victor is Copyrighted Born Victim
http://www.furaffinity.net/user/bornvictim
Applejack is Copyrighted Hasbro
www.hasbro.com
Art is Copyrighted Andy Price
http://andypriceart.deviantart.com/
Category All / Fanart
Species Horse
Size 1006 x 1280px
File Size 294.4 kB
I'M NOT SENDING THEM CELESTIA QUADRUPLED THE WANTED POSTER BOUNTY ON BOUNTY-NET.COM!!
Might wanna warn the ponies that non-friendlies are coming....well maybe Pinkie can way-lay Deadpool...or maybe that'd make it worse.
*Ding*
*looks* Whew...all clear a bigger bounty just came up....some asshole named Ken Penders took the top spot...wait a minute I know that guy! *locks and loads* I'M JOIN' YA BOYS!
*and enough bounty hunter nonsense from me*
Might wanna warn the ponies that non-friendlies are coming....well maybe Pinkie can way-lay Deadpool...or maybe that'd make it worse.
*Ding*
*looks* Whew...all clear a bigger bounty just came up....some asshole named Ken Penders took the top spot...wait a minute I know that guy! *locks and loads* I'M JOIN' YA BOYS!
*and enough bounty hunter nonsense from me*
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