Conner in Wonderland 06 - Lay of the Land
> PINCH YOURSELF
Ouch! No, you're still here, under a great big tree looking out over a vista of colorful castles and strange cities, so you're probably not dreaming.
> READ SIGNS
The signs coming out of the monkey's hat are many, each offering a different direction to take. Some read 'This Way!' while others read 'Go There'. One pointed straight down even reads 'Why Not Here?'. There's also one arrow pointing right back at the monkey that says 'Low Prices!"
> TALK TO MONKEY
The monkey balances carefully on his unicycle, a big grin on his face. "I can see the interest in your eyes, friend! You're directionless, without a way, wandering the wilderness! You need someone like me to sell you a route to your goal, whatever that may be! Two for one! Limited time offer! Buy now!"
> INTRODUCE YOURSELF
You decide that, before you buy anything from the exuberant salesmonkey, you should at least introduce yourself and say hello. The monkey smiles as any good sales-simian would, tipping his hat precariously. "And a good day to you, Mr. Conner. A fine day to wander about and enjoy the beauty of Wonderland, isn't it? That is, wandering with a sense of purpose and direction! My name is Simon, dealer of directions, agent of aim and objective, peddler of pathways! Why with one of my custom signs tailored specifically for you, sir, you could go almost anywhere! Anywhere within the limits of Wonderland itself, that is!"
> DANCE WITH MONKEY
Haven't you considered dancing enough already? Besides, you're not sure if Simon knows the Funky Chicken.
> SHOCK THE MONKEY
Cool it there, Peter Gabriel. Not only would it be bad manners to electrocute a friendly direction peddler that you just met, you also have nothing resembling a stun gun or electrodes in your inventory.
> ASK MONKEY ABOUT LANDMARKS
"Ah, curious about our fair Wonderland, are you? Of course you would be! Well, right now you and I are standing beneath the enormously overwhelming TUMTUM TREE, also know as Yggdrasil or the World Tree to some. It's the biggest tree in Wonderland, and a a fine landmark, if I do say so myself! Why, it's branches provide shade for a mile in every direction, and some say that if you were capable of climbing it to the very top, you'd end up falling into the sky! As curious as I'd be to see if that were true, I'm afraid I'm desperately needed right here on miratio firma!
Now, down there where the roads meet is the lovely city of EVER AFTER! Its central location makes it a wonderful place to meet new people and see new things! Though I imagine to someone just coming into Wonderland, every place will be like that! Ha! A keen eye may notice the ivory LIGHTHOUSE in the center of the city. It's rumored that the everlasting signal light from that tower is the source of Wonderland's power, or perhaps it's how people are guided here in the first place! Either way, it's definitely worth a visit!
Over to the south along that red brick road is the way into CHESSLAND and the RED CASTLE. That's where the Queen of Hearts resides, and a benevolent ruler she is, too! Far kinder that her predecessor, I can tell you that. Why, I hear the royal axeman had to find a new job from a severe lack of heads rolling!
To the north you'll spot the TULGEY WOOD. A lot of mysterious goings on happen in there. Not for the faint of heart, but still quite an adventure, I'm sure! For those brave enough, you can seek out THE WABE, a pub that's a veritable hive of scum and villainy, or even try to set foot in the HATTER'S WORKSHOP, if you can get past all the booby traps!
The kingdom to the north is known as OZ, and its capital is the opulent EMERALD CITY. It's got some of the tallest buildings, the fanciest technologies, and latest fashions! And King Scarecrow runs it all very wisely, I hear. If you want to be impressed, or you really like green, that's the place to go!
And finally there's the DARK MOUNTAINS. Not a place I would recommend going, and not just because it's the home of the WEST WITCH'S FORTRESS. People who wander into those mountains tend to not come back, or if they do, they tell stories that make others not want to wander in!I don't know much about the West Witch, but if she's anything the ones that came before her, she's likely up to no good!
And that's it for the major landmarks in Wonderland! Well, at least the areas that I can tell you about! Interested in travelling anywhere?"
> ASK MONKEY ABOUT JOSE
You ask the monkey if he's seen a big strong bull with a big smile and a ponytail recently. "Afraid I haven't friend! I just arrived shortly after you did, it seems! Maybe your friend's wandered off? Gasp! But without any direction, he could be anywhere! the horror!"
> ASK MONKEY ABOUT BROCK
"Who? Sounds to me like you're fixating on something that isn't relevant to your current situation, my stripy-tailed friend!"
> USE NEWSPAPER ON MONKEY
Whether you plan on letting the monkey try to read the newspaper, or swatting him with it, you have a feeling neither will be very successful, or end well.
> USE NUNYA ON MONKEY
"Ah, that's... a fine rat you have there, Mr. Conner! Such a handsome creature! Why, I can almost see the gleam of intelligence in his eyes!"
Nunya snarls at your one-wheeled acquaintance. "Yeah? I'll tell -you- where to go, monkey-face!"
"Haha, and so verbose! he must be a delight to talk to, truly."
> BECOME SUPREME OVERLORD
First the subway car, now Wonderland? You're ambitious! Woefully unqualified, but ambitious!
>TEACH NUNYA HYPER BEAM
Ooh, sorry, this is the wrong game for that kind of thing! But Nunya did learn SNARK!
"Nerrrrrrrd."
> ASK MONKEY ABOUT DIRECTIONS
The monkey's grin brightens at the mention of his wares. "Ah, yes, so many directions! So many places to go and things to see! As I said, Mr. Conner, I'm having a two-for one sale! I not only have a multitude of ways to go, but ways to get there, as well! Not only can my signs get you to ANY LOCATION you desire, but you wouldn't have to bother with all the walking it takes to get there, either! I have over and under, around and in between, here and there, quickly, slowly, with caution, with abandon, and even a few WET FLOOR SIGNS to ensure the ground is soggy, if you're into that sort of thing!
> BUY DIRECTIONS
"Ah, excellent, excellent, excellent! ...Ah, you have no money, sir? That's alright! All I'd need in exchange for two of my directions is one you can give to me! Any direction will do! I'll just wait right here until you come up with something. ...Haha, did you get it? 'Up'? That's a direction joke!"
> LOOK AT BUTTONS ON TREE
Now that you take a closer look, there appears to be a set of two colorful buttons by the entrance to the subway station. One is the same red as the subway car, and the other is a powerful shade of purple.
> PUSH BUTTONS ON TREE
Daring the unknown, you try pushing the red button... but nothing seems to happen. Tempting fate twice, you push the purple button. Before you can react, a large purple door slides over the entry, and the signs above it flip upside down. The '#12' sign now features a wide grin, and the arrow that was pointing down swivels to point upward. However, the fixture holding the arrow in place seems to unscrew itself a bit in the process. Someone should fix that before it falls off completely!
INVENTORY:
- WARNING POSTER
- GYM BAG
GYM BAG INVENTORY:
- EL TORO COSTUME
- STINKY GYM TOWEL
- HAND MIRROR
- ALUMINUM CAN
- OLD NEWSPAPER
- NUNYA
- TINY CLEANING SUPPLIES
Ouch! No, you're still here, under a great big tree looking out over a vista of colorful castles and strange cities, so you're probably not dreaming.
> READ SIGNS
The signs coming out of the monkey's hat are many, each offering a different direction to take. Some read 'This Way!' while others read 'Go There'. One pointed straight down even reads 'Why Not Here?'. There's also one arrow pointing right back at the monkey that says 'Low Prices!"
> TALK TO MONKEY
The monkey balances carefully on his unicycle, a big grin on his face. "I can see the interest in your eyes, friend! You're directionless, without a way, wandering the wilderness! You need someone like me to sell you a route to your goal, whatever that may be! Two for one! Limited time offer! Buy now!"
> INTRODUCE YOURSELF
You decide that, before you buy anything from the exuberant salesmonkey, you should at least introduce yourself and say hello. The monkey smiles as any good sales-simian would, tipping his hat precariously. "And a good day to you, Mr. Conner. A fine day to wander about and enjoy the beauty of Wonderland, isn't it? That is, wandering with a sense of purpose and direction! My name is Simon, dealer of directions, agent of aim and objective, peddler of pathways! Why with one of my custom signs tailored specifically for you, sir, you could go almost anywhere! Anywhere within the limits of Wonderland itself, that is!"
> DANCE WITH MONKEY
Haven't you considered dancing enough already? Besides, you're not sure if Simon knows the Funky Chicken.
> SHOCK THE MONKEY
Cool it there, Peter Gabriel. Not only would it be bad manners to electrocute a friendly direction peddler that you just met, you also have nothing resembling a stun gun or electrodes in your inventory.
> ASK MONKEY ABOUT LANDMARKS
"Ah, curious about our fair Wonderland, are you? Of course you would be! Well, right now you and I are standing beneath the enormously overwhelming TUMTUM TREE, also know as Yggdrasil or the World Tree to some. It's the biggest tree in Wonderland, and a a fine landmark, if I do say so myself! Why, it's branches provide shade for a mile in every direction, and some say that if you were capable of climbing it to the very top, you'd end up falling into the sky! As curious as I'd be to see if that were true, I'm afraid I'm desperately needed right here on miratio firma!
Now, down there where the roads meet is the lovely city of EVER AFTER! Its central location makes it a wonderful place to meet new people and see new things! Though I imagine to someone just coming into Wonderland, every place will be like that! Ha! A keen eye may notice the ivory LIGHTHOUSE in the center of the city. It's rumored that the everlasting signal light from that tower is the source of Wonderland's power, or perhaps it's how people are guided here in the first place! Either way, it's definitely worth a visit!
Over to the south along that red brick road is the way into CHESSLAND and the RED CASTLE. That's where the Queen of Hearts resides, and a benevolent ruler she is, too! Far kinder that her predecessor, I can tell you that. Why, I hear the royal axeman had to find a new job from a severe lack of heads rolling!
To the north you'll spot the TULGEY WOOD. A lot of mysterious goings on happen in there. Not for the faint of heart, but still quite an adventure, I'm sure! For those brave enough, you can seek out THE WABE, a pub that's a veritable hive of scum and villainy, or even try to set foot in the HATTER'S WORKSHOP, if you can get past all the booby traps!
The kingdom to the north is known as OZ, and its capital is the opulent EMERALD CITY. It's got some of the tallest buildings, the fanciest technologies, and latest fashions! And King Scarecrow runs it all very wisely, I hear. If you want to be impressed, or you really like green, that's the place to go!
And finally there's the DARK MOUNTAINS. Not a place I would recommend going, and not just because it's the home of the WEST WITCH'S FORTRESS. People who wander into those mountains tend to not come back, or if they do, they tell stories that make others not want to wander in!I don't know much about the West Witch, but if she's anything the ones that came before her, she's likely up to no good!
And that's it for the major landmarks in Wonderland! Well, at least the areas that I can tell you about! Interested in travelling anywhere?"
> ASK MONKEY ABOUT JOSE
You ask the monkey if he's seen a big strong bull with a big smile and a ponytail recently. "Afraid I haven't friend! I just arrived shortly after you did, it seems! Maybe your friend's wandered off? Gasp! But without any direction, he could be anywhere! the horror!"
> ASK MONKEY ABOUT BROCK
"Who? Sounds to me like you're fixating on something that isn't relevant to your current situation, my stripy-tailed friend!"
> USE NEWSPAPER ON MONKEY
Whether you plan on letting the monkey try to read the newspaper, or swatting him with it, you have a feeling neither will be very successful, or end well.
> USE NUNYA ON MONKEY
"Ah, that's... a fine rat you have there, Mr. Conner! Such a handsome creature! Why, I can almost see the gleam of intelligence in his eyes!"
Nunya snarls at your one-wheeled acquaintance. "Yeah? I'll tell -you- where to go, monkey-face!"
"Haha, and so verbose! he must be a delight to talk to, truly."
> BECOME SUPREME OVERLORD
First the subway car, now Wonderland? You're ambitious! Woefully unqualified, but ambitious!
>TEACH NUNYA HYPER BEAM
Ooh, sorry, this is the wrong game for that kind of thing! But Nunya did learn SNARK!
"Nerrrrrrrd."
> ASK MONKEY ABOUT DIRECTIONS
The monkey's grin brightens at the mention of his wares. "Ah, yes, so many directions! So many places to go and things to see! As I said, Mr. Conner, I'm having a two-for one sale! I not only have a multitude of ways to go, but ways to get there, as well! Not only can my signs get you to ANY LOCATION you desire, but you wouldn't have to bother with all the walking it takes to get there, either! I have over and under, around and in between, here and there, quickly, slowly, with caution, with abandon, and even a few WET FLOOR SIGNS to ensure the ground is soggy, if you're into that sort of thing!
> BUY DIRECTIONS
"Ah, excellent, excellent, excellent! ...Ah, you have no money, sir? That's alright! All I'd need in exchange for two of my directions is one you can give to me! Any direction will do! I'll just wait right here until you come up with something. ...Haha, did you get it? 'Up'? That's a direction joke!"
> LOOK AT BUTTONS ON TREE
Now that you take a closer look, there appears to be a set of two colorful buttons by the entrance to the subway station. One is the same red as the subway car, and the other is a powerful shade of purple.
> PUSH BUTTONS ON TREE
Daring the unknown, you try pushing the red button... but nothing seems to happen. Tempting fate twice, you push the purple button. Before you can react, a large purple door slides over the entry, and the signs above it flip upside down. The '#12' sign now features a wide grin, and the arrow that was pointing down swivels to point upward. However, the fixture holding the arrow in place seems to unscrew itself a bit in the process. Someone should fix that before it falls off completely!
INVENTORY:
- WARNING POSTER
- GYM BAG
GYM BAG INVENTORY:
- EL TORO COSTUME
- STINKY GYM TOWEL
- HAND MIRROR
- ALUMINUM CAN
- OLD NEWSPAPER
- NUNYA
- TINY CLEANING SUPPLIES
RULES AND FIRST PAGE
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Category All / General Furry Art
Species Raccoon
Size 700 x 3000px
File Size 1.52 MB
Act offended that monkey is dismissing the importance of Brock! Brock is likely some super villian that has kidnapped poor Jose!
Take direction sign.
Give to monkey in exchange for his directions.
Wonder out loud why directions will pay for his wares when the rest of the scraps that you've carrying around won't pay for it. A soda can is better than a sign! At least it can be recycled!
Ask who lives in the tree.
Point out cat face above door if monkey plays dumb.
Swat at cat face with gym towel to see if it is alive.
Take direction sign.
Give to monkey in exchange for his directions.
Wonder out loud why directions will pay for his wares when the rest of the scraps that you've carrying around won't pay for it. A soda can is better than a sign! At least it can be recycled!
Ask who lives in the tree.
Point out cat face above door if monkey plays dumb.
Swat at cat face with gym towel to see if it is alive.
I'd be a bit hesitant about getting someone else's arrows or directions from the tree myself. Besides, if something like WET FLOOR is an option, you may as well USE MIRROR to get HCTAW ROUY NO PETS T'NOD, and see if you can trade that along with DON'T STEP ON YOUR WATCH for something else. Heck, see if NUNYA is willing to TRADE with any DIRECTIONS from the NEWSPAPER.
FA+

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