I have a lot of love for colleen as a character, and love teasing and seeing almost any new art on her, but this.,.. I had hopes when I saw the thumbnail and read the title, but this... I honestly almost feel bad for having read this.

Um, okay?

To be fair, you did a wonderful job putting Colleen in character, as many folks whil erecalling she's british, don't fully bother working with her speech pattern, which you again did well. In general your story could hav ebeen much better written, both in terms of a grammatical sense (especially with regard to your use of punctuation) as well as the plot/details could have been a bit better built around the story, instead of waived away as seemingly random/unusual events. I mean, omnious foreshadowing in everything, yes, but perhaps in not so heavy ammounts.

*hugs on* sorry for leaving such a short comment before, i was in the process of heading to bed when i found the story