Nice. ^^

you like it?

-nods- yep, yep. :3

thanks ^^ *huggles*

Pretty good. ^_^ I hope the next ones are longer, though.

And just a tip, try to fix a few of the grammatical errors. It would make it easier to read.

thats what im bad at T^T

hey you, good work ...sadly i must do this... ok here is where i, the reader, complain to you, the writer. this is what i dont like about it.
-it jumps too much (scene transitions are not smooth)
-the story behind it wasn't fully developed. (not enough info was given to reader)
-the characters have no personality developed...
-there is no description for characters. (what do they look like, what are they wearing.)
-the story is hard to follow


im sorry, im not doing this to be spiteful.... infact its the oppisite. i want you to get stronger in your writing. becouse i realy do love stories. and i feel if you got better more people would care about your work. which in turn would mke you happier.

^^ thank you ^^

ive takenm like ... idk a 3 year break from this story. mostly cuase i fail at writing ^^

i can do story out lines but when it comes to writing it i fail -^^-

don't say that... im here to help you. I think.... iether way im telling you to practice... do like i said... build up your story... work on it.. i will help you out. Thats what crazy people are for right?... (wait, or is it friends?)

^^ thanks *pounces*

Your welcome.
Counter-pounces Muhahahaha
NO but realy will you try to work on it? i will be keeping one big solid white light emmitting eye on you.

>.> if i ever find a word program. if not its back to word pad XD ^^

do you have scype? can IM so we dont have to trade messages? my skype addresss is denthanus.dot

do you want a link to skype download... if you dont have it?

>.> down loading fails on this comp but i can try ^^ send

first im gonna give you a link to Free Download Manager.... if your using dialup... this may help you. this the link to the LIGHT version.... 2.6 mb http://files.freedownloadmanager.or.....minst-lite.exe


and this is the link to skype: http://www.skype.com/go/downloading.....ive=2777493299

>.< didn't work >.<

yay im going to try now ^^

which one? both?! OhhhNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOESSSS

yes both T^T

GAME OVER!!!
Try Again
(YES) NO