"The majestic and exceedingly tragic wall coeurl is one of Eorzea's rarest creatures. While very deadly in it's extremely small radius of reach, it's equally very easy to avoid running into, as it, from the moment of it's largely mysterious birthing into any given vertical surface in the lands, does nothing but scream incessantly and with shocking fluency in a myriad number of languages, bemoan it's blighted existence, as having most of it's back half either trapped within or melded as a part of said vertical surface was not part of 'the plan', so to say. Unconfirmed reports say the creatures often curse out at whatever gods they can name, beg for death nigh constantly, and occasionally scream at an entity they refer to as 'Square Enix' on the matter of why it couldn't be in 'FFXV' instead."

- Kimberly's Journal of Stupid Shit Wot I Saw






I'm sorry. I'm tired, and it was funny to me when I saw it.