I think it's a bit too early to be talking much about the characters and setting, so I'll just say my peace on the technical side.

First: Is there some reason that words cut off halfway through at the end of a line and finish on the next line, instead of just shifting the entire word down?

Second: For ease of reading, I'd suggest always starting a new paragraph whenever a different character speaks, instead of just on occasion.

Grammatically speaking, there's not too many problems (except "explored" is misspelled as "explorered" twice, not sure if that's a stylistic choice or not.)

Despite those gripes, though, I'm interested in seeing where this goes next~

It's probably the program I'm using that might be causing the words to randomly cut off. However, I'm not entirely sure yet. It doesn't show that while I'm writing it up so perhaps it might of just been a simple error.

And as for seperating the paragraphs for each character, yes I immediately got to doing that for Chapter 2. It just slipped my mind while writing Chapter 1 so a simple writing mistake on my part. x3

I really appreciate the constructive criticism and I hope you'll enjoy on what's to come! ^_^

A good first chapter, looking forward to seeing more of Candy and Plix's adventures together. :3

Thank you! I did make the novice mistake of not separating the lines for each character, but luckily enough, I didn't forget to do that for chapter 2. ^_^

Heh, I did notice some examples of that, though I've heard from some people that's a style choice. I didn't used to do it myself, though now I've started I couldn't imagine going back xD

Going to watch you so I can keep up to date on your writing. x3