313 – Timothy Hay w/ Patches

Third Judge of the High Garbage Council and High Hierophant in the schismatic Cult of the Unseen Mother who Waits For Us All, Eastern L’Enfants Plaza Splinter Group. The Eastern L’Enfants Plaza Splinter Grop split from its parent religion, the Greater L’Enfants Plaza Cult of the Unseen Mother, in 1926 over the issue of whether the Unseen Mother was more likely to return at 5:00 p.m. (when her shift ends) or at 7:00 p.m. (assuming she’d need to take the Metro after work).

Adherents to the Cult of the Unseen Mother who Watches Us All believe that no urchin is truly an orphan; whenever a child is abandoned by his or her biological family, they are instantly adopted by the spirit of the Unseen Mother, who really truly plans to make her presence known just as soon as she can.

Timothy Hay has summoned the Dapper Lads three times, twice on purpose and once by accident. The exact necessities for the summoning ritual are unknown to urchin scholars, but it’s thought to require white hen fat and belladonna extract.