Clearly this bird heard about how popular I am on the internet, but to keep a story short, I was minding the store today when this little fucking bird flew in through the front door and perched on my fucking head.

Longer Story

I have never seen this bird before. And I was confused as fuck when it flew in... and frozen in place when I felt it land on my head. I sat there for a few moments and reached up with a finger. The little guy pulled itself onto my finger and accepted my invitation to perch on my shoulder instead where it proceeded to Chirp and Peep into my fucking ear off and on.

After it felt cozy enough it flew off again around a corner and I hear it just SLAM into the fucking window.
"Begin Operation Find My Pecker"

Managed to find this little guy shuffling back and forth underneath one of our display stands and encourage him back onto my finger where I take him back to my desk.

At this point "Chirpy Little Cunt" and I take a few selfies together and once he was done being photogenic as fuck he hopped down and nestled adorably as hell inbetween my hand and tummy. I guess CLC needed to warm up a bit since it was raining and cold as fuck when he flew in to begin with. After he seemed to warm up I fingerlift him onto my shoulder and walk outside, hoping that CLC will go back to where he came from. Success, Chirpy flies off and perches on some of the shit outside. Good for him as I go back to watching Netflix.

Not even a minute later Chirpy Little Cunt soars right the fuck back in and perches on me again. Well this should be interesting as customers pull into the parking lot.

Big ol granny lady jabba the huts on in and notices Chirpy Little Cunt... Apparently some of my E-Wang must of rubbed off on CLC because he gave no fucks and flew over and landed on Granny Tit. Granny was shocked but amused. They bond for a little, CLC follows her around the store and keeps flying back to her when Granny finger passes the bird to me.

Eventually Customers go away and I'm left there with Chirpy Little Cunt again. I've had him there for like an hour now and I'm thinking to myself. Shit, I gotta close soon. The fuck am I gonna do with you Chirpy Little Cunt. So I sit there and ponder for a moment, giving Chirpy some little nuzzies as I turn my head side to side rubbing my face against him as he Peeps in my fucking ear.

Then w/o Warning Chirpy fucks right off out the door again and I wait. Chirpy don't come back. I go outside, look around. Don't hear his Cunty Little Chirps at all. He must of flew away for reals this time.


I'll Miss you Chirpy Little Cunt.



~Drayk
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