Here he is, how i ACTUALY intended Lucas Goathorn to look in my head the first times. IDK WHY I turned him dark blue in that one picture, but THIS is how he is supposed to look.

I was having a SEVERE anxiety attack last night, then i noticed one of my all time favorite artists was streaming. So I went and watched them for a while, but my anxiety was still bad, so I was drawing WHILE watching,, and this was the result...

This character is based off my ex boyfriend... Who I still love with everything in my being... It was just.. one of those things that 5 months later, I still cant bring myself to really talk about... But This character...

My therapist realized that these characters are not just an excape from reality, but my way of fixing my people problems, even though it doenst fix anything really...

I always say when I die, My two character "Dates" Lucas and McKayla will be there waiting for me.

That belief... got the cops called on me... by someone who doesnt know me, the context of that comment, or anything about me... He stole Luke's phone and read our conversation, yet somehow SKIPPED the like 50 times I said I was NOT suicidal...

Honest to god... Lets just say it left me with some trauma... I'm afraid of police, headlights at night, Police cars... Ect... I almost forgot what I was doing the other day while driving when I saw a police driving... it's bad...

ANYWAY: In my character's story,this is why Spenser is so traumatized. He was dating him, and he broke up with spenser for reasons that didnt exactly add up... (TBH, I still mumble to myself about what i did wrong with Luke...) And He's the reason spenser has crippling anxiety and is mentally insane.

Art © Me (I didnt bother with the logo... was too concerned about anxiety last night...)