So this is for all you folks who helped us get to the $450 mark on the "Bigger is Better" Growth Drive; it's a little interview with one of Renard's characters, Victor. Of course, just like El Toro, he's a bit larger than usual...

Art by Yours Truly
Story and Victor provided by  Renard_DeFleureax

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First, general information for the audience: what is your name, your occupation, and, for now, your weight?


I’m Victor Magnusson- occupation’s, uh, strictly classified, I’m afraid, but this is all, gosh… eighteen, nineteen… maybe a full ton, now? You lose track after a while, heh.

Oh, I think our audience can see that. Now, what got you into this… shape?

You’re looking at the 2015 Champ of Bigger Is Better, ‘course. I wiped the floor with all those little guys they put me up against. Five challenges, five wins for Magnusson!

You mean you won every time on the show?

You bet your ass I did! Eating contests, obstacle courses, races…

Wait, wait. You won a race? A foot race?

Yeah? What, a big guy can’t be fast?

You don’t exactly look built for speed, no.

Well, okay, yeah, you got me there… but I didn’t have to be fast, just faster than the other guys. And, well, only a guy strong as me can pull off this bod… by that I mean, I was the only one walking by the end of it.

What do you mean by that?

Hah, none of the other contestants could handle all their weight! We had two bodybuilders, but they were like, nothing compared to me, and just some regular guy. The first two challenges, I was able to pack on some serious muscle, but the last three… well, the third one was the eating contest. It’s not my fault the others couldn’t handle bulking up.

So, what happened when you won?

Man, it was great. Those two cats, the hosts? Really generous guys. We had a big party, all the food I could eat, and they gave me a lifetime pass to every Cheese Steak joint in Philadelphia! I dunno how they found out my little, ah, weakness for those, but man am I glad they did!

What’ve you been up to since then? Aren’t you known for staying in fighting shape?

Hey, now. You think you could take all this? Maybe it’s not what I’m used to, per se, but there’s worse things… I could be a total twink, for starters.

So, you said it’s not what you’re used to… what’ve you had to change in your daily life to accommodate your new… assets? Has anyone close to you made comments?

Oh, well, Ma took it as a bit of a shock… but hey, I think she’s a little glad I got more, uh, padding, I guess you could say. I’m in a dangerous line of work, and I’ve had to slow down as a result of hauling all of me around.

What other changes have you had to make to your daily life?

Uh… well, I may be eating a little more these days…

A little? You brought a cheese steak to this interview.

Yeah, and have you tried one of these? It’s from Vinnie’s, just down the street. You’d bring it to your own wedding after you tried one, trust me.

Well, I think that’s all the time we have… we’re going to need the commercial break to replace our couch… any thoughts for the future? Will you be trying to lose the weight?

Lose weight? Well, it’d be a lot of work… maybe in a bit when the bulking season’s over. ‘Til then, I think I can afford to live large.