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Story / Transformation
Species Western Dragon
Size 50 x 50
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Well, I think it's time that I actually started submitting something here. Somehow, I keep forgetting that this site exists, even though I have an account on it! Anyway, this is the first story in my "Mythic" series, which I already have several stories for. I'll make sure to post more when I get the chance, so as usual, I welcome constructive criticism, and until next time, I'm Robert Dayson, signing off!
Category Story / Transformation
Species Western Dragon
Size 50 x 50px
File Size 18.4 kB
If you're looking for constructive criticism, I'll say three minor things:
1) When a quote ends but the sentence doesn't, the standard practice is to use a comma before the quotation mark. "Like this," he said.
2) The word for the body part is "heels," not "heals." It's a minor spelling mistake, but honestly it sort of ruined the mood for me in the middle of a TF sequence. x3
3) I find it just a bit hard to believe that it would take that long for Connor to figure out he was turning into a dragon, given how much fantasy he allegedly reads. Maybe it's just me, but I imagine I'd figure it out pretty quickly.
Again, these are all minor complaints.
1) When a quote ends but the sentence doesn't, the standard practice is to use a comma before the quotation mark. "Like this," he said.
2) The word for the body part is "heels," not "heals." It's a minor spelling mistake, but honestly it sort of ruined the mood for me in the middle of a TF sequence. x3
3) I find it just a bit hard to believe that it would take that long for Connor to figure out he was turning into a dragon, given how much fantasy he allegedly reads. Maybe it's just me, but I imagine I'd figure it out pretty quickly.
Again, these are all minor complaints.
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