The story continues:

“THAT WAS A GUY?!” Okay, admittedly, the Team Aqua guys weren’t so bad, if it weren’t for the stupid “Make the oceans bigger” shit… where the hell were we humans supposed to live? And apparently the leader knew that Maxie was a dude. “Holy freaking FUCK. THAT IS THE MOST EFFEMINATE MAN EVER.”

“Oh, whatever…” I mutter as I shake my head. I had other stuff to do, like climb down this mountain. I gave an uninvested wave to the group at the top, and started down the slope. Supposedly the town at the bottom held my next gym.

A few pokemon battles later, and I have an old lady shoving an egg at me. What the hell? I take it, looking down at the spotted shell with confusion, before shrugging and stuffing it into my bag. Whatever. I’d see what it hatched into before shoving it into my PC, I guess.

I could see the gym in the distance, and I placed Kito’s ball at the from of my belt. “One shot, one kill, right buddy?” I grinned as I headed inside. This was getting truly silly. But at the same time, my strategy had been victory through over-powering all along. May as well run with it.

One shot.

One Kill… or well, faint…

Every pokemon in the place was down within the first move.

I hadn’t realized I was THAT overpowered… or maybe it was because I threw a swampert at fire-types… That was probably it. Either Mud-bomb or watergun killed everything, even the gym leader didn’t stand a chance, which was saying something with the screaming she did before we started the battle. I sighed, taking the badge and heading down the steps, hitting the door only to have Brendon run straight into me as I headed for the pokecenter to rest up. I only just now realized how short the kid was, as he struggled to remove himself from my chest.

I sigh and shove him away, “What do you want, kid?”

“Did you just beat Flannery? Awesome! I was just heading to Petalburg for the next Gym, you want to come with? We can take the bus!” He said, grinning like an idiot.

I sighed, fine… I could sleep on the bus then. He dragged me along, and I grumbled under my breath. At least at this point I was fairly certain the next gym would be pretty easy too.

Aaaand it was. Who would have thought a Dustox with Toxic and Venoshock would be so efficient at utterly destroying a bunch of normal types. Even the one pokemon with immunity to it, still got hammered by the Psybeam Lily had as backup. Norman was… pathetic. He didn’t even have a chance to use that hyperpotion he had ready. I grinned, taking the badge, “thanks, pops.” I gave him a nod, and a laugh, and headed out the door.

Some guy tossed Surf at me, and I went back toward Mauville. May as well see what adventures the sea held, right?


I looked at Panny. She was rapidly becoming that pokemon you have around solely for it’s ability to do EVERY HM YOU GOT. I’m fairly certain if she had wings, I’d teach her fly and be set. I had taught her: Rock smash, Surf and Strength, and she took it all in stride. My little Linoone was AMAZING. As I shrugged out of my clothes to change into a bathing suit for the ride, Panny chased beautiflies out in the grass. I watched her and grinned, shaking my head as I motioned her over. “Okay, Panny… lets go.” I pulled on the goggles that idiot… Brendon, Brandon… whatever, had left on the bus, and stepped into the water, my linoone shooting out infront of me. I grabbed hold, and off we went.

It was like having one of those little motorized water scooters… She just pulled me along, and I clung to her fur. A few times a tentacool attempted to pry me loose, but Ren knew giga-drain now, and that meant basically anything that lived in the water was as good as gone. Beautifly and Linoone, what a dream team. As we came up on the other side, some dude was waiting for us… He looked a little familiar… wasn’t he the guy I gave that letter to a while back? Either way, he started talking, and I just nodded like I understood, until he was dragging me onto the back of some kind of talking mini-jet.

That was a Latias… I was riding on a LATIAS. Holy crap, it’s a bloody legendary and I’m riding on it.. My life was now complete.

Wait… nevermind…

This island was cool… and… at the end of it, was Latios… the blue mini-jet pokemon… It appeared to be afraid, and when… Steven, I think was his name, stepped forward, I could see why. “Again, the stupid devil wannabes, show their ugly heads. Can you guys please just stop? It’s getting seriously annoying.”

The lady turned and grinned, her little slobbering slave boy did as well, and I groaned. “Okay, fine… you wanna fight? I’ll fight you…” Steven joined in, throwing out a Metacross, which, of course, I admired. “Love that pokemon, man… can I borrow it?”

“No.”

“Awww….”

I threw out Panny. I knew MAgma’s habit by now… Always fire types.
Out came a Camelrupt and a Koffing. Yep, called it. The lady said something… stupid… “Delete”

“Hold onto your shorts, Steve... Panny. Sweep up, use Surf.”

The Linoone looked back at me and nodded, before it’s fur bristled. I’d always loved using surf in a proper battle. It was so cool… Panny dashed to the side, and leapt into the water, sending up a humongous wave of water, far too large for such a small, lithe animal to create alone. The wave swept across the island, sweeping the koffing and the Camelrupt away, over the edge and dousing them both, drowning them to unconsciousness. Both Magma-punks were soaked to the bone, and Steven looked a bit like a drowned rat. I grinned.

“Oh yea, sweety… I do believe I just deleted your chances.” I said, walking over to her, a wicked smile on her face. “Remember this, bitch. I WIN. You can try again, if you want.. But it’ll always end the same way. You, all wet, and me laughing at your failure. Run, tiny, run.”

And she did, dragging her slave alongside as I turned back to Latios. A second later, I had a pokemon I had had no intention of catching, sitting on my belt, and my dustox was in the terminal. Steven and Latias had flown me back, and I wasnt happy. “... I’m getting Lily back…”

“... And taking a freaking break.”