*offers a hug and a shoulder*

who said this to you?

if you wanna talk their are a bunch of us here if you need us tarti

...I hope everything's alright Tartii.. *hugs*

whats up hon?

Thats one of the biggest problems with relationships nowadays. Sex shouldnt be what holds it together. Sex is a bonus. Its something that deepens the relationship, not the cornerstone of it.

Anyone that thinks that someone doesnt deserve love or affection because they wont put out for them right away doesnt deserve it themselves, because its obviously not a relationship that they're looking for, its the rush and thrill of intercourse, and you can be sure that after they're tired of their partner they'll get rid of them for another.

OMG i agree you...
Great and long lasting relationship is from best friendship. Sex should be just extra

Exactly. The longest relationships come from friendships. I've told people that your significant other should be your best friend, and I'm continually amazed by how many people are confused by this. Being friends before dating isn't "old school", it's a tried and true method that works a good % of the time. Why does it work? Because the longer you spend with someone the more you find out about them; their habits, mannerisms, motivations, devotions, etc. You learn whether you really can put up with them, and most of the time this process takes years, but no one wants to wait that long. Instead they rush into a relationship, and possibly marriage, then find out down the line that that wonderful guy or girl that they fell in love with really wasn't so wonderful after all and that's how marriages split. It's also why so many are afraid of marriages. It's because we've lost sight of what made them lasting to begin with.

/Rant

No!! Seriously... I believe in the same and i tell this to people too!!!
Sadly if you want "just a relationship" it will stay about: "please change, act other way, do this, do that, i don't like it, change style etc..."... and at the end one participant will be trying to save the whole relationship somehow (that is so all the same that time)

*rants* Sadly all of this thing is impossible for me... i passed 30, my hands are binded and i have much much much less friends in real life (physical form) that people guess i have :|

Relationships are as individual as can be. "A relationship should be xyz" is really not a wise approach, if you ask me. A relationship is the way you can agree on, with your partner, or what you can compromise on. Every relationship is different.

If you think sex is optional, a lot of people think differently. That is just how it is. I'm not saying it to be mean or cold. Sorry.

But Tartii, I hope you're gonna be okay. I'm not even sure that this is what the drawing is about. Much love. You are awesome, Tartii.

You won't have to get used to be alone. Because you're not gonna be alone, Tartii. Love is always going to win out, just you see.

Did someone actually say this/act like it? I doubt someone is stupid enough to have directly said it.

I speak from experience, yes. There are people stupid enough to say this to someone's face.

I've also seen the same people get instantly decked, and my god it instantly put a smile on the face of the ones told that.

I hate to think of someone actually saying this to Tartii, too. It makes me so angry, that someone has such a hissy fit so as to crush someone's spirits like this!

And I feel useless, I dunno what to do about it. ;; I'm this empathetic, 'I wanna make everything ok when you're sad' guy in my group of friends, and I wanna make everyone feel better, but I can't because I don't know Tartii, and even if I did, I'm so far away I'd still be useless. :c

Regardless, I hope she feels better, and has her own group of peeps to help make things ok again

Sometimes these words come from the person it's directed at... self harm using words. It is a sad thing that happens when one gets that depressed.

Whoever said something like that is not worth the air in their own lungs

Don't think like that! You won't be alone forever, no one said it would be easy but it'll be just as hard if you let stuff like that hold you back! Your art makes me and probably thousands of people smile everyday!

Anyoen who would say this is far too concerned about sex to be mature enough for a relationship.

A quote from my favorite game series "Don't give up skeleton!"
I do like it when artists draw images with more emotion, even if it's emotions displayed that normally nobody wants to be feeling. Great piece <3 you get a squeeze

Give up, fatty

Fat rolling all day

*offers hugs* I know we don't know each other but I hate seeing people unhappy. If you want to talk I'm here for you so just note me if you want.

*offers furry hugs* hope you feel better

Hum.

I sense a bit of double standards.

What sort of double standard would that be?

To tell someone whom contributes to their community and society that they aren't putting out.

Yet, the only character in the piece is Tartii, not anyone else.

I believe she isn't crying over what someone else told her exactly, but what she's telling herself. Like she's holding herself to double standards that she can't reach, hence her suffering.

That last sentence didn't quite make sense. Holding herself to standards she can't reach would make sense, but it seems that in the context you used "double standards" in doesn't quite fit, as a double standard is a rule or principle that is unfairly applied in different ways to different people or groups.

*Hugs* Please feel better soon Tartii.

I love you booboo, if you need someone to vent to I'm here. <3 This has a lot of really strong emotion and is really well drawn <333

Awww... I wanna hug and make you feel better :C
Kitty deserves the best.

You deserve to be happy. You're a pretty cool person and it's hard right now, but it'll be okay, I know it will be someday.

I sincerely hope nobody had the callousness to actually say that to you, and if they did, then they are beneath you.

If you're asexual and the other person either doesn't understand that or just keeps pressuring you to do whatever then they don't deserve to be with you because you deserve someone better. It's as easy as that, sure it may hurt now but at least you aren't trying to change from being your unique self for someone else to make them happy. That is not how relationships are suppose to be.

Maybe these will brighten your day (1) (2)

Worked for me.

*hugs * hope you get better girl, i know that feeling to well. The pain of been alone it makes you numb,i hate it, i become some one who all i can do is study and go home.
But as long as you have a friend or family there, youll stay sane, thats how i survived 4 years in college right now!

There is nothing wrong with you
Anyone who says this to you is a horrible person.....

You are a wonderful human being and worthy of everything....

wow. hitting home. i can sympathize and it sucks.

That's when you tell them to fuck off because you would be alone if all he wants is to have fun and not understand why you are not the one that wants to be the victim of just another dick and run...

Not often you see vent art that actually conveys emotion effectively
this one make me think...

well done.

whomever said this is not worth your time!

As someone bordering the line between demi and ace who is now in the middle of a messy divorce after she stopped having obligation sex with her husband... This...

Oof...

*offers hugs*

Would love to give her a nice tight hug.

*wingwraps* ovo

Sex ain't shit and it's owed to nobody. Nothing wrong with not 'putting out' and anyone who takes issue with it don't deserve it in the first place and likewise, ain't shit. Loneliness does suck but sex should never be a bartering token to not be lonely.

And happy ace week

Though it probably feels impossible, you're not alone. A lot of people--myself included--know how you feel.
You're not alone in the way you feel. Nobody is the same, but we can still understand.
And don't let the selfish demands of others change you. You don't have to be anyone other than yourself. Anyone who wants you to be someone other than you, needs to find someone else.
Keep being you, Miss Tartii, because despite what others might say, you are--and will continue to be--a beautiful person who deserves to be (and definitely is) loved.

Don't give up, there's someone out there that will appreciate you for the person you are.

Aww boo, don't listen to them, you deserve an awesome person and you'll find them eventually :)

;..; awww hun dont cry, you have a lot of people who are here for you and care about ya, even those who are willing to do anything for you, myself included. I know how the pain of feeling like you'll never get to have another by your side, one who will cherish you for who you are and comfort you in dire times when things seem to just crumble about you. Don't give up hope though, I haven't yet, I'm sure you will find someone to hold dear to your heart and they you in turn. You are a wonderful and sweet woman who deserves a great deal comfort, I hope that you receive such soon *snugs tight*

It has nothing to do with getting over yourself. Trust me on this.

"Oh, you want to do something nice for you? Maybe you should ____sex thing here.____" Yeeeeah.. no.

That's a really really rough stumbling block (brick wall) for any relationship to have to endure. Having sex be an expectation rather than a whimsical/fun thing is really awful, especially when it's resentably tied to a `sex=reward spending` concept or vice versa.

Here's hoping this wasn't based on an actual RL event.

This hurts me right to the core, I'm so sorry that anyone has ever made you feel this way.

Sorry that something bad happen to you. I hope you'll feel better as soon as possible, really. There is nothing wrong about cry when you need to cry.
I know this is cliché but you're not alone when I saw all the sweet comments of people.


And about the picture. You draw very well feelings.

I'm sure you will be ok. Since you're not alone and we all need you, because you put some lil' parts of soul into your Artworks, and they are beautiful. So don't cry. *warm furry hugs*

Damn this is cold and immature to be told. :(

No. This is wrong. Any person who demands your body without a life commitment (I don't care if nobody believes in marriage, I do) is a weak person, who wants the reward before he puts the work in.

Unfortunately, that is increasingly how it is today, which is why we have skyrocketing STDs, unwed pregnant mothers and single moms, and generally an increasingly broken society.

Tartii, please do not think yourself less for trying to stay pure. You are doing the right thing, and unfortunately, the right thing does often take us down a much harder path than if we gave in.

But the truth is, that giving in takes us down an easier, but horrendously empty path. I believe you want to be loved, cherished, cared for, adored. You CANNOT have those things if you let a guy talk you into sex. You can have a shadow of them, yes, but it is ultimately empty, and hollow.

If he's not willing to suffer and endure temptation, to keep his hands to himself, to treat you with dignity, honor, and respect, and if he is not willing to spend at least a year getting to know you, and then pledge his his entire life to you, not touching you a moment before your honeymoon, then he does not deserve your body. That may seem harsh by the world's standards, and it is why me and my ex are no longer together. I wouldn't "Put out" for her, either.

I am glad I didn't, because I thought she was the one, and the only way I figured out that she was not, was because I didn't have the deceiving cloud of sex around me.

It's not easy and I still think about her.

Please don't let any guy talk you into sex without him putting in the effort, first. You won't find many guys willing to put in the effort.

My mentor once told me, "It is better to be alone and by yourself, than to be alone, and with someone else."

Giving sex before a marriage commitment almost guarantees the latter.

You are worth it. You are worth the time it takes to get to know you. You are worth sacrificing for, you are worth the agony of self denial, as he gets to know you better. Don't think you're not. But the path to true love can take many years, and yes, you will be alone for a while.

If you want, I am always here to listen, to guide, to give you advice. Send me a note if you want, I am willing to listen. It would be my pleasure.

I know you probably won't get this message along with practically hundreds of concerned messages on this piece. I for one disagree. I believe anyone can be loved. Love and putting out are two different things. One day miss Paul your going to meet someone who loves ya for who you are inside. The creative, wonderful artist, fun, and Disney loving person. Give it time I assure you and you will find I'm right. And if not just tell me and I'll eat my hats...... ._. Which will probably be a world record in of itself. Anyway I hope you get this and I hope it helps everyone deserves happyness, and everyone deserves love.

We're often our own harshest critics. How can we not be?
We know every mistake, every flaw, every single little thing we get wrong.
It's easy to beat oneself up. It's hard excepting yourself, flaws and all.
But once you do. You'll realise, these little imperfections? They make you kinda amazing...

"hugs"

I love you, Tartii. Don't fuckin listen to whoever said this.. They're wrong.
If you ever need anything, anything at all, just message me. You can even call me. I'm here for you. Always.

I know the feeling

awwww, don't cry precious Tartii, though I know all to well, whats its like to be alone

I do hope you're alright, even though I don't really know you.

Awrr ;; I don't know the details behind this picture but I'm here for you if you ever need someone to vent to. You are loved.

I hope things are okay.

Story of many beeps their lives, which also means they know your pain.
And by knowing they care more for you then anybeep else!
You are awesome and we love you as a person, not as a sex-object or anything like that.

And this may seem just a comment from somebody far away, but that may even be better then a bully from close by...

i hope everything is ok. we are all here if you need someone tarti. really good job on the art

What a douchy thing to say.
And that's an understatement.

Take it from all of us, Tartii, and certainly one with an overly-active sex drive. The sex isn't everything, and anyone who thinks that's the only part of the relationship that matters is simply not worth your time. Like some others said, it's a bonus; or in some ways, it's a means of teasing your loved one. It is NOT the building blocks of being with someone.

I hope everything works out for you, hun. I hate seeing vent art from the artists I like because then I know they hurt, but at least if they post the art...Maybe then their fans can offer some form of comfort and perhaps even help stop/ease the hurt!

(Edit: Excuse the "hun" part. >< Comes out when I try to offer advice or when I see someone hurting. ;; )

"what makes you think you're worth anything, when you think all women have to put out" is an appropriate counter, I think..
Have had many years- long close relationships with a few lovely ladies. Nothing more than hugs and closeness, no intimacy needed to be close.
It's a personal choice, and one beyond outside opinion. You take any message like that under this picture of yours and you slap that bastard Amy way you want, verbally or otherwise.

You're not the only to be burned like that :(
[hugs from behind and rubs your arm]

*opens wings and offers a hug* i know that feeling as well, but giving up hope is the worst thing you can do. be strong little one, be strong

;n;

I really hope no one said that to you! There's so much more to relationships than just sex. Whoever thinks like this doesn't really want a relationship, they just want a booty call. You are so much better than that! *hugs*

I wuv you ;-;
dont let them hurt you poom

i have just seen your journal, never acctualy seen this uploaded till now, as many people probably said, who ever told you that is better not being in your life and if it is yourself saying it, you are doing just fine with everything you do, plus, you are never alone, you have all of us behind you, encouraging you on to become better as an artist and a person

I know that you've gotten many comments on this but I just want you to know That any choice you make for yourself and decide to do with your body are yours and only yours, and you deserve to be happy with that choice, not pressured to do it. I hope you're feeling better. If you ever need to talk, I'm here anytime. You are wonderful Tartii. ❤️

Probably you arent going to read comments here anymore since you want to leave this behind and this lil thing will be buried among lots of better comments, but anybody who could've said something like this isnt more than a piece of shit, over all if said person knows what you are and what you want/like.

I hope everything goes better. Don't chew this too much or your teeth will start to get smaller.
Anybody who is in a relationship just for sex, should just get one of these people that just do sex for money instead of trying to "farm" somebody who wants something better and deeper than just that.

Never forget what everyone else has been saying- You're awesome yourself.
Don't let anyone treat you like an object.
And like the saying says, "better alone than in bad company."

Eventually you'll find somebody who appreciates you for what you are.

AWWWWW *sniffles* ....


*hugs*

wow that's super mean D: n like, naughty stuff is just part of a relationship, it shouldn't be the main focus or sole indicator.

Humanity sucks ass. Come with me to Mars.

Tartii, you will find somebody who will be willing to wait for you. I want to wait until marriage and my bf still loves me and respects my decision. We've been together for 1.5 years now. They are out there. <3 I hope you feel better. ;;

Alone? You're never alone if you have friends, which i see you do. You can feel alone if you're with someone who acts like a dick.
Be yourself, don't feel pressured, and don't let assholes make you feel bad about yourself.

As an ace this happens so so often but don't give up, there are good people out there. People who realize ace people are real and have feelings and we are valid and not broken. Just because we don't "put out" doesn't make us invalid lovers, we can still love and feel even if we don't feel sexual attraction or the need to have sex.

You are great and wonderful just the way you are, don't let anyone assign value to your life but you <3

Is this just theoretical, or did some asshole say that to you?

That's some shitty stuff right there.

*hugs* Your body is your own and you can do whatever you want or don't want to it, and it doesn't matter if you won't "put out" to someone. Screw them. Your body is not theirs to demand services from.

Your vent art is some of your most beautiful work.

I think the wall of support posted before me speaks for itself. We're all here for you, Tartii.

I hate people who are that way honestly. I don't get it, I enjoy meeting new people or characters just as much if not more than just banging then, it's always nice to make a good friend. I know you have a ton of people already to talk with probably but if you ever want another I'm here for you, trust me when I say I've been through more than my own share of bullshit.

On a lighter note the piece itself is done wonderfully, the tears look really good which can be hard to pull off sometimes. Excellent job on the art itself ^^

You're a very nice person, hun. That is such an awful thing to say to someone. Blatantly fucked up to say.

Your 'sona, the way you dress, has always looked to me like a boxer. Maybe you should be fighting this kind of crap more.

At the end of the day, the fool who said this, is not capable of creating art like this. He isn't even in the picture. He's not part of a community. He doesn't get comments of sympathy.

Who is really alone?

Beautiful piece, as always. But I can't shake the feeling there is more to it, If you need to talk do so, there are plenty of people right here, an outpouring of support at your back...including me. I hope everything is okay, dear. Cheers.

Must give hugs, but I only have two arms. :[