Stumbling Words

in my speech
my thoughts lay murdered
uttering much less
than what i've dreamt
rather would i sit
in silence
let my heart listen
to yours
without the folly
of my words

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i don't know why i'm so dramatic... i guess it's just part of me. all efforts to 'lighten up a bit' have been mostly fruitless... just a few puny morsels... i just have to figure it's important for some reason. i have a hard time deciding if everything is important, or if nothing is... it's about the same either way i guess. and don't get me wrong, i am an excessively happy person and i freakin LOVE being alive and connecting with people. i like humans.

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Deleted Title

now say goodbye
as i cry
without a tear
my insides sigh
i'll miss you so
you'll never know
how dear you are
to me.

so if seasons flow
or seasons go
and you come to find
you need me so
i'll be waiting
as i always have
loving love.

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i don't know if i should have even included that one... i wrote it so long ago... after acting all tough and than feeling like an idiot. ehhh what evers! i gotta vent through my art...


the universe is all, and all is the universe;
a constant painting in progress...
happiness is learning to blend
just push the paint around you
find the beauty of everything
in just a smear.

anybody still reading?
no... that's okay... i'm not very good with connecting anymore. unless i go out to a store, the highest number of people i physically talk to (on a normal day) is 3. it's such a strange thing.

i wish EVERYONE could find happiness
i wish i didn't write you when i was drunk on top of emotionally unstable
i wish i didn't worry that i'd bother you if i called.
i wish i was drunk right now.




long................................