here is like a scene that played in my head for the past week. i dont know why i wrote it. i guess cause its i hate my father...

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the day the medical marijuana became legal my father started to smoke now and then to relax. my father has been a monster to me all these years. one day my dad smoked a blunt and came to my room to see me.
"hey son? can i come in?" he asked smelling of weed

"yeah, what?" i called from behind the door working on some watch faces

"i just wanted to say that i love you son, i am so proud of how far you came in life. i am sorry... i never treated you like a son..." he spoke with his voice starting to sound like he is ready to cry after saying that.

"yeah yeah, i love you too pop. i am busy with something here". yeah... i didn't give 2 shits what he just said. he has been a total ass to me and now he wants to say "i love you son" when he had all this time to say so. to treat me nicely like my mother did when he wasn't around my whole life! i didn't want to hear any of his crap. as my father walked out of my room, my phone rang and it was my mate. he told me that they made an appointment for me and my dad to come in and talk. i guess he wanted me to try to make things right.

"-sigh- gaia... i can't do it, that man... is not my father, he has never told me he loved me and that he was proud of me just out of the blue. but i will go and you can come with to see how he is when he is sober."


the next month me and my mate went to the doctors and my dad sat on the couch and asked me if i can have a seat with him. "no thanks, i will stand" i said. the doctor came in and we had a talk on how me and my fathers bond was.

"see doc" i started. he has never treated me nicely! i can even have a nice talk with him without putting me down on the smallest thing! so why should i forgive my father for that!?"

"son... please calm down" my dad said as he reached for my arm. "i want to make things right with you"

"no! fuck you! you just like to complain to me when my old harley would have a problem! even if there was ONE LITTLE thing missing like a screw for the seat you gotta go and bust a fucking gasket over it! remember that fucking nice bike you had in your shed all the fucking time cause you never got it fixed?! that was all fucking rusted up yet you flip the fuck out when there is a small dirty spot on my bike!!!" i said getting a little heated up from him

"Tj...please calm down... i am not yelling at you... no need to yell at me" my dad looked like he was ready to cry.

"what about the fucking pick up truck you were gonna get me!? you kept that fucking thing for yourself! what are you gonna do with a damn truck from 1993 when you have a god damn jeep from the 2000's?! what about the assault rifle you made for your girlfriends kid!? he didn't use the damn thing since he got the fucking thing!!!! i don't want to hear it, and i hate you!!!!" my face was getting really red from that

"you hate me?" he said getting pissed. "you hate ME!?"

"YEAH! I WANT A FATHER, NOT A FUCKING MONSTER!!!"

"well if you weren't such a disappointment i wouldn't treat you the way i do"

"i'm a disappointment?"

"yes you are!!!"

i took a deep breath and grabbed my coat "if you died while on duty, then i will be the happiest fucking person in the world, then the world can hear 'i am glad my dad is DEAD!!!' for once!"

i slammed the door behind me with my mate walking beside me in the hall of the building, holding my hand. "i fucking hate him... he had all this time to make up for everything, but no! i can't do it no more!"

the next day after that fight i went for a motorcycle ride. as i pulled on the highway i was struck by a semi truck i dont remeber what happend, or how i got to the hospital, but it looked like i was in the ICU, or an ER. i saw my mother on the chair with her makeup ruined. i guess from crying all day.

"mo...ther...?" i tried to call out to her. she lifted her head right up and came to my bed quickly. she told me what happened and what damage was done to me. after a while my dad came in, looking like a grump like always. he didn't seem sad. or shocked to see me like that. my mom told him what happened and he looked at her asking "why was i not told this when it happened?!"
my father looked over at me and said "you know the bike is totaled? i am not getting you a new one!"

my mom then snapped at him! "what the fuck Todd?! he was just in a motorcycle crash!!! no 'hi bud, how are you feeling?' or anything!? just 'the bike is totaled'?!?!"

hospital security came in to see what was going on and i told them weakly and short on breath "mom....stays.... he....goes...." security came and escorted my dad out of the hospital as to my request. months after i recovered from rehab i decided i move away from my dad. i cut my phone service, and left any trace of me behind. me and my mate packed up our shit and moved. we didn't know where, but i was sure we could find a place.