James, an aspiring baseball player, is frustrated with his lackluster performance during his last game. His friend, Copper, seeing James slouched on the field, decides to cheer him up with a game that involves a lot of batting and a truckload of fattening.

--

On the commonplace baseball field of an ordinary high school, a close game was on the verge of concluding. At bat was a black bat clasping his bat’s battered handle. His eyes were locked on the pitcher, a tiger with an emblem of a bear printed across his red uniform. After a few suspenseful seconds, the predator swung his arm forward, hurling the ball towards the batter. The bat watched the ball intently until it crossed home plate, at which point he swung his bat.

Encouraging cheers rang through the air as the ball soared. The bat and his team mates sprinted to the next base. As soon as he took a peek upwards, he lost all will to run, stopping midway to first base. The ball flew higher and higher, but never gained any horizontal distance. The outfielder lazily positioned himself under the fly ball with seconds to spare, letting the ball settle in his glove. With that, the empire called out three, the loaded bases were emptied, and the score was finalized at 5-6 in favor of the Grizzly Bears, securing another loss for the Furious Ferrets.

The crowd and victors cheered, but the empire hastily shushed them. The teams formed single filed lines and high-fived their opponents as a form of respect. The bat faked a smile as he went through the line, but inside he couldn’t shake the fact he threw the game for his team. Afterwards, the opposing team resumed throwing their fists in the air and chest bumping each other. His own team showed little concern for their loss, inviting him to a night of pizza, but he declined. The busy field soon became desolate, leaving the fly ball hitter alone to slump his head in his hands and mull over his failure.

~

Copper, a slim, blue hummingbird with slack attire, threw the last crate inside the truck and slammed its tall back door. He took a moment to wipe sweat off his forehead, then climbed in the front seat and turned the keys in the ignition. As the truck rumbled, he took out his GPS and punched in the address of the landfill his boss indicated. Gripping the steering wheel, he pulled out of the warehouse and onto the freeway, advertising the name of his company’s prized product, Puffy Powdered Donuts, to whoever drove past the massive truck.

Comforted by the cold air that blew through his feathers, the slim trucker hummed and tapped his fingers against the steering wheel. All he had to do was dump these expired donuts and he was free to go home early for the day. With how labor intensive his job was, he was happy to take all the spare time he could get.

Copper glanced at the familiar scenery as he drove through an exit: restaurants, gas stations, the local high school. His eyes lingered at the school’s baseball field, the place his friend was supposed to be playing today. At first impression, it looked completely deserted, but Copper soon noticed a small speck of black among the expansive orange. He thinned his eyes to take a closer look, but they widened when he fully made out the figure.

James, one of his closest friends, was all by himself at home plate, his head tucked inside his knees. The sight brought a frown to Copper’s face. With no tasks for the rest of the day, he was in no rush to hurry his current one. He could take a quick stop to check up on his friend and be back on the road within a half-hour. Convinced, he made a wide right turn, pulling up next to the tall, metal gate that divided the bleachers from the field.

James didn’t flinch when he heard a loud vehicle park behind him. Hearing the slam of a car door, he assumed it was a security guard coming to kick him out. However, as he heard the jangling of the field gate and the heavy pounds of footsteps on the field’s sand, he grew tense from the intruder’s muteness. When he felt strong arms squeeze his shoulders, he whipped his head around in a panic. His heartbeat calmed when he saw it was merely his long-time friend, Copper.

“Don’t scare me like that, Cop,” James said, his voice trembling. “I thought you were a kidnapper or something.”

Copper chuckled as he slid next to the shaking bat. “I didn’t mean it like that,” he said. His voice was deep and commanding, a stark contrast to the soprano bird. It complimented his broad stature, scaling a few inches taller than the bat. “What’s up? You look down. Did your game get canceled or something?”

James frowned, turning his head away. “I screwed up,” he said softly. “The bases were loaded, we were only one point behind the other team, and I hit a fly ball. Game, set, match.”

Copper nodded sorrowfully, patting his friend’s leg. “I’m sorry, man,” he said apologetically. “Don’t beat yourself too much over it. Mistakes happen all the time.”

James sighed. “Sure, but I’ve been making a lot of mistakes recently. Just this game, I struck out twice and hit three fly balls. I didn’t get anything more than a single.” He slumped his head lower, making circles in the sand with his shoes. “Maybe I’m not cut out for baseball. I should probably be a lawyer like my dad, put my blood sucking skills to good use.”

Copper shook his head. “Don’t say that. You just need a bit more practice, that’s all.” His friend only mumbled in response. Cooper frowned; he wasn’t getting any closer to cheering up the slumped bat. Tapping his feet on the ground, he scanned the area. Upon noticing a baseball bat leaning against a fence, he was struck with an idea. Leaping to his feet, he shuffled across the sand and threw the field gate open.

James’s ears perked at the sound of a truck door opening. Turning around, he saw his friend pulling a white crate out of his truck. As Copper hefted it towards the filed, James looked through its wide holes to find it stuffed with white-coated donuts. When the hummingbird reached the pitching mound, he dropped it with a thud, a small cloud of sand forming around the container.

James stared in puzzlement. “What did you bring that here for?”

Copper smiled. “Practice. Go grab your bat, bat.”

James rolled his eyes, then stood up and walked to where his bat laid. It was only when he saw Copper grab one of the doughy snacks did he realize what his friend meant. “We are not practicing with that!” he snapped with an unamused frown. “Those things will break right when I hit them!”

“Relax,” Copper replied with an unconcerned tone. “These things are well past their expiration date. They’re rock solid.”

James was still unconvinced. “OK, so how is this going to work?” he inquired. “Are you just going to pitch them to me and see how many home runs I get or something?”

Copper shook his head. “I don’t know much about baseball, but it sounds like you need help controlling your aim. I’ll stand here with my beak wide open, and you’ll aim straight for my mouth.” Copper pointed inside as demonstration.

James went silent for a few seconds, resisting the urge to smack his hand against his forehead. “That might be the dumbest idea I’ve ever heard!” he yelled. “Do you even realize how fast those things will travel, especially if they’re as hard as you say they are? You’ll be lucky if you don’t end up toothless!”

Copper chuckled. “Birds don’t have teeth, James.”

Annoyed, James puffed his cheeks. “You know what I mean. Anyways, they would never have the same weight and feel as a real baseball, so any practice with them can only do so much to prepare me for an actual game.”

The hummingbird huffed in defeat. “Alright, maybe I didn’t fully think things through,” he admitted. “I just thought this could be fun for both of us. You get to improve your skills, I get to eat a few sweet treats, everyone’s happy.” Figuring he wasn’t making a strong enough case, Copper decided to sweeten the deal. “Tell you what. If you can prove this was a terrible idea within the first couple throws, I’ll go out and buy an actual baseball so we can really practice.”

James’s face lightened. “Really?” he said in disbelief. “You would do that for me?”

Copper smirked. “Only if you play along with my ‘dumb idea’ for a while.”

James laughed, stretching his arms out before grasping his bat. “Deal. Just don’t go crying to me when you get hurt.”

Copper stood with a near perfect pitching stance, his back straightened and his arms to his pecs. He took a step forward, launching the treat towards James with the speed of a professional athlete. James, taken aback by his friend’s skill, barely hit the ball off the tip of his bat. The donut shot towards the far left and bounced on the dirt, stopping a foot from third base. James frowned disappointingly, which Copper was quick to notice. “Don’t worry,” the hummingbird reassured. “You’re just warming up.”

James flexed his fingers before grabbing his bat again. “You’re a good pitcher,” he complimented. “I bet it comes from your lean muscles. I’d almost kill for a body like yours.”

Copper’s smiled wavered. “It’s not that great, honestly,” he admitted. “Sometimes, I wished had a more lax body like you.” James was taken aback, but he blinked himself out of his stare; right now, he needed to practice.

Copper pitched another ball. James, with his focus increased, landed it much closer to his destination. Copper had to swing his hip to avoid the ball that barreled towards him. “That is fast...” he muttered softly. He bit his lip, reconsidering whether this game was a good idea after all, but shook his head. “You see?” he said with a smile. “That was a lot closer than last time!”

As Copper retrieved another donut, James rolled his shoulders and narrowed his eyes, determined to put maximum effort in his next hit. When Copper pitched, James took into account the angling of his bat and the position of his friend’s head before striking. He saw it travel in a straight line until it plunged inside his friend’s mouth.

Copper’s cheeks puffed as the donut’s friction burned the insides of his mouth. With widened eyes, he circled around in wobbling steps like a drunk, struggling to swallow the thick donut. Tears ran out of his eyes as he felt the donut slowly inch down his throat until it plopped inside his stomach. He was relieved he managed to swallow the donut, so much so that he was unaware of the subtle bloating in his gut. “Damn,” he said, his voice a croak. “Somehow, I didn’t think it would hurt as much as it did.”

James put his fist to his mouth, laughing excessively at his friend’s misery. Copper, as his pain died, joined his friend. With a few coughs, his voice became crystal clear again and his mouth free of stinging. James halted his laughter with a breath, smiling in accomplishment. “I can’t believe I actually hit that in,” he said.

“That was pretty good,” Copper agreed as he reached down for another donut.

James cocked his head. “Hey, I thought you said those things hurt?”

Copper lifted his eyes towards his friend. “Yeah, but they also taste like sugary paradise, even when expired. I’m sure I’ll get used to the pain after a few more beatings.”

James crossed his arms. “Are you sure you aren’t saying that ‘cus you don’t want to admit this game was a terrible idea?”

Copper tapped his forehead. “I’m a dolt, remember?” he joked. “It takes a while for things to sink in up here.”

That got James laughing again. He shook his head. “Man you’re one crazy bird.”

Copper smiled. “Less yapping, more practicing.”

James and Copper practiced during the next few minutes. As James’s aim steadily improved, the gap between successful hits shrank. Copper, with each ball that shot through his throat, became more adept at swallowing the treats until the pain was negligible. It didn’t take long before James was chucking ball after ball inside the bird’s mouth. His streak ended at five with an off-base hit, and James could hardly believe what he just accomplished. Copper clapped at his friend’s achievement with a wide smile.

James smiled as well, but it drained when his eyes lowered to his friend’s stomach. It was no bigger than a pot, straining the fabrics of Copper’s grease-stained button-down shirt with every belly laugh. Looking up, he also found a slim coat of fat across the bird’s cheeks and neck.

It took a few seconds for James to break out of his stare. “How fattening are those things?” he said in shock. “Your stomach is nearly as big as the crate, and we haven’t even been through half of it!”

Copper’s eyebrows jumped slightly upon seeing his protruding belly, but otherwise he didn’t show much surprise. “Oh, that. The donuts have a nasty bloating side effect when expired, and it only gets worse the longer they’re left to rot. Still, I didn’t expect to get so fat off of just a few. These must be several months old at least. No wonder they want me to get rid of them...”

James would be horrified if he looked down to find a pot belly, but since he wasn’t on the receiving end, he was free to chuckle at the chubby bird. “Well, it’s a good thing we found this out before you really blubbered out. Now we can stop while we’re ahead and go on to some more professional practicing.”

Copper shook his head. “Nah, it’s fine. I don’t mind the extra weight, really.”

James’s eyes widened. “Seriously? Don’t you need heavy muscles to lift those crates all day? If we keep practicing, you’ll end up with your belly brushing against the wheel whenever you drive!”

“Hey, I didn’t say we’ll practice for that long,” Copper responded. “What kind of trucker looks like a twig anyways? Fluffing me out a bit more would help me blend in with my coworkers.”

James thought on it. “Well, since you seem so excited about gaining weight...”

Copper smiled. “Let’s at least play until the crate’s empty.” He bent halfway before a popping noise interrupted his movement. He blushed as he watched a shirt button roll around the pitcher’s mound. “...Maybe sooner than that,” he added.

As they practiced, James found it easier to hit the doughy balls, to the point where he didn’t even have to think about it. He hit another streak of donuts, twice as long as the first. Copper’s stomach bulged as each of the ten donuts traversed down his throat, his shirt straining further. The buttons on his shirt popped from bottom to top until his entire half-foot round belly was exposed.

James gulped as he stared at his friend’s jiggling mass. “Cop, you just burst out of your shirt, and your jeans look like they’re next!”

Cooper looked down to find liter-bottle thick thighs. He chuckled as he squeezed its flesh. “Wow. I never imagined I would be this huge.”

James was confused by his friend’s joviality. He would bite his nails if he gained even five pounds, yet here was his friend giggling at his obese body. “Are you really not concerned by the fact you gained like a hundred pounds?”

“I told you I wanted to round out a bit,” Copper replied. “I just didn’t think I’ll enjoy it this much.” James was about to retort, but he bit his tongue. Copper threw his arm back with a smile, at least until he felt a resistance near his stomach. “Uh, one second.” He frowned as he tugged at his belt. It unbuckled with a snap, its metal bended from the forceful pulls, and he sighed in relief as he let his stomach dangle over the zipper of his pants. “Man, I’m going to need a new wardrobe after this...”

James hit the next ten donuts with perfect accuracy, but didn’t feel a tinge of accomplishment. Instead, he looked at his friend’s bulging body with worry as the rips in his jeans grew wider and more plentiful. Before long, his pants ripped to shreds, followed by his underwear and tennis shoes. Looking over his friend’s bareness and largeness, his concern intensified.

Copper only smiled wider at his unclothed body, welcoming of the breeze that chilled his fat. His body wobbled and jiggled as it moved around, and he found the comical movement amusing. His pitches became slow, sloppy, and tiring, but he enjoyed every second of practicing. Bending down to retrieve another donut, his hand was met with an empty crate. Wheezing, he placed his bloated hands on his rounded knees, which caused his stomach to sway mere inches from the ground.

James could keep quiet no longer. “I appreciate you helping me out and all, but this is really getting out of hand.” he said flatly. “I’m no longer getting any challenge, and you’ve only been piling the pounds since we’ve started this game of yours.”

Copper stretched out his arms before responding. “Tell me this, James. Do you feel totally prepared for your next game?”

James looked towards the ground. “No,” he said meekly. “I still have a lot of trouble hitting consistently at far distances. Whenever I try to hit past the infield, it almost always ends up as a fly ball or grounder.”

Copper snapped his sausage fingers. “I’ve got an idea. Do me a favor and grab a crate from the truck.”

James wasn’t fond of any idea that involved more of those hyper fattening donuts, but obliged anyways. As his arms swung low from the crate’s hefty weight, he wondered how Copper managed to carry these all day. He dropped it next to the fat bird, sweating and breathing heavily as he took labored steps towards home plate. The bat was quick to recover, only needing a few arm stretches before he was ready to bat again. James turned around, only to be met with shock as he eyed his friend. Copper had the crate titled toward his mouth; he gulped loudly as he kept with the pace of the sliding donuts.

“What are you doing?” James said, eyes widened.

Smiling, Copper chucked the empty container towards first base. “Expanding your practice.” His stomach gurgled ominously for a few seconds before lurching out a few feet, instantly tripling in size. Fat plumped his entire body from head to toe, squishing his body parts closer together. Upon reaching a full ton, he lost his balance and collapsed on his wide rear. As his stomach bloated, it lifted his head higher, and soon he was as tall as he was standing up.

When Copper finished growing, he was indistinguishable from his lithe form. A dumpster-sized gut took the center stage, spreading apart his bloated thighs. Almost as impressive were his bean bag buttocks, which spread out wider than two benches and brushed his neck in height. His limbs, spherical and inflexible, were only able to wiggle around. At the top was a flabby head with cheeks the size of bowling balls and chins fatter than steaks. The ginormous blob had to look down to find his friend, who looked significantly smaller from his balcony view. He figured he must be at least 12 feet tall and a few more wider.

Copper blushed, a shy frown spread across his face. “Man, you must have picked out really expired donuts. I ended up even bigger than I expected...”

James was speechless as he looked up to his lardy friend. He felt a pang in his heart, believing it was his fault his friend had to do this to himself. “How is this supposed to help, Cooper?” he said nervously. “You can’t pitch, you can’t walk, and you can’t drive. I don’t think we can even fit you in the back of the truck...” James was incredibly nervous, pacing back and forth and biting his lip.

Copper gave his friend a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry about any of that,” he said with a tone that was almost too carefree considering his predicament. “Just think about how much extra practice you’ll get now. With me being so tall, you’ll have to put in a lot more power to reach my head, and it’ll be harder to aim accurately as well.”

James, while flattered at the lengths his friend was willing to go to help him practice, couldn’t bring himself to believe the bloated bird. “Who cares about any of that!?” he countered. “Baseball means nothing in the long run, but mobility is much more important. You didn’t have to give that up to help me hit baseballs a little better.”

Copper chuckled. “You think I would just destroy my physique for some silly practice?” A heavy blush emerged on his face. “To be blunt, I started to enjoy my increasing weight the more we practiced. It didn’t take long before I started wondering how it would feel to chug down a whole crate of donuts, and man was it better than I expected. Feeling my body ripple and spread with fat, it was like my whole body was massaged at once. And just seeing my blubber spread across the field is so entrancing, knowing that all of this flesh and space belongs to me...”

James, stunned by the confession, wondered how much of it was exaggerated. He got his answer when he looked up to find Copper in a daze, with his tongue out and his eyes rolled to the sky. The sight was enough to drain the worries from James’s mind. He cackled like a hyena, unable to stop his lips from curving into a wide grin. “I may never get what you’re saying, but if you’re cool with it...”

Copper smiled, glad he could brighten his friend again. “Now that I immobilized myself, we have to keep practicing. Go get another crate, for yourself this time.”

James smiled with enthusiasm, even as he struggled to carry the next crate to home plate. He picked up a donut, rolling it in his hand to get a feel for its texture. When he was ready, he tossed it in the air. He quickly clasped his bat with his throwing hand, just in time to swing. The ball swerved towards the bottom of his friend’s stomach, landing nowhere near his target. James wasn’t dismayed, simply glad to find pitching to himself wasn’t as tough as it seemed. It took a while to fully adjust to the new practice routine, but he eventually manged to strike one inside his friend’s mouth.

Copper swallowed, his body swelling to consume another inch of the surrounding land. “Keep them coming!” he encouraged. “We won’t stop until you’re the top hitter on your team!”

Yet again, James found himself hitting consistently as he figured out the perfect blend of power and trajectory to reach his friend’s mouth. However, as soon as he became comfortable, he looked up to find the bird a foot taller, forcing him to recalibrate. James, appreciating the added challenge and variety, came to enjoy the revamped practicing. His mood rose with the rising of his friend, encouraging him to put more effort into his swings. Soon enough, he maintained a 50-50 hit rate, which wasn’t bad considering the longer distance.

After a few crates, Copper became even more swollen. His thighs brushed over first and third base as his butt smothered second. When his stomach bumped against James’s feet, the bat broke out of his concentration. Looking over the enormous bird, James’s eyes widened. “Cop, you’re covering the whole infield!” he exclaimed.

Copper smiled triumphantly at his awed friend. “I’m glad you noticed,” he said with a pinch of smugness. “Keep on hurling those donuts. I want to make sure you’re the best player in town!”

James blushed. “I don’t think I’ll ever be the best player – there’s more to baseball than batting, you know – but we’ve certainly made you the biggest bird in town!”

The corner of Copper’s mouth perked. “Then let’s keep on making me fatter so I keep that title for good!”

James shot a playful look at his friend as he returned to the truck. “I hope you don’t end up regretting that.”

Over the next ten minutes, James’s accuracy steadily improved. However, he was quickly met with a difficulty spike as his friend spilled into the outfield. For one, he had to sink his feet into his friend’s flesh when the sand beneath him disappeared, making his stance wobbly and inconsistent. Secondly, Copper was quickly reaching the heights of buildings, forcing the bat to use the most of his strength to reach his head. Combined with the whirling winds that came with an increased altitude, it became more a game of golf than baseball.

James persevered despite his difficulties. His hits missed their mark by several yards, but his landing radius slowly shrank, encouraging him to try just one more time. Copper, noticing the scattered collection of donuts that should belong in his belly, attempted to dissuade his friend. “Hey,” he began. “You can come closer if it’s too hard-” Before he could finish, he saw another donut hurling towards his mouth, and he opened wide to play along, not expecting it to go anywhere. However, his eyes widened as he saw the treat’s flight bend towards his head, the donut steadily coming closer until it landed in his mouth.

James stepped back, unable to believe he chucked the ball into his friend’s mouth from over a hundred feet away. Copper chuckled as he watched his stunned friend. “Good job,” he said. “Maybe we’ll actually get to emptying these at a decent pace again.”

James narrowed his eyes. “You bet,” he said boldly. He resumed batting with renewed confidence, slamming another donut inside his friend’s mouth within a dozen throws. Eventually, James moved himself a few yards forward, but only when his friend became too tall to be reachable. Over time, prioritized hitting consistently from a reasonable distance over trying for long, power-heavy feats, which helped the bird bloat at a faster rate.

When the truck’s supplies dwindled to a handful of crates, the humungous bird covered most of the field. His stomach rode the front gate until its bottom rolls were halfway up the steel boundary. Only a wide stretch of grass remained on the outfield, the rest of it consumed by two blubbery buttocks. Copper’s pleasure increased with every foot he bulged. With limbs spread far and wide, he felt like a floating head among a boatload of lard, but he loved the feeling of being consumed by his own fat. Looking to his friend, he was hit with another wave of joy, happy to see the previously moody bat bounce with energy. As he felt his backside brush the cold gates, he purred excitedly, wondering if he’ll grow big enough to spill out of the field.

James tossed the last crate over the field gate with his left hand while he twirled the final donut in his right. He ran down his friend’s belly, deciding to make his last hit the most ambitious.

Copper chuckled. “That must be a few hundred feet away. Are you sure you don’t want to come just a little closer?”

In response, James shot his friend a confident smile, which was enough to shut the bird up. He breathed, then launched the donut into the air. He twirled his bat and rocked his hips as the ball dropped, and when it was at his waist, he smacked it forward. His blank expression grew a smile as he saw the treat glide in a smooth arc towards his friend’s face and plop inside his throat. He pounded his fist in the air, happy his last hit was as climatic as it should have been. Copper’s body rumbled once more, rattling the nearby gates as he bulged out for the last time.

Throwing his bat to the side, James walked up the rolls of his friend’s stomach, marveling at how outrageously gargantuan the bird was. The field’s sand and grass were replaced by thick layers of blue lard. Copper’s stomach consumed the infield with its multitude of rolls. His curvy, lardy buttocks each consumed their half of the outfield. Flesh poked out of the wired gate’s hexagonal holes, a gate that leaned heavily from the pressure exerted by his titanical weight.

James stepped onto Copper’s jugular moobs, his balance wavering at its sharp elevation. He collapsed on one of the bird’s numerous neck rolls, panting as he wiped sweat from his face. As he recovered from his workout, he surveyed the view in awe, seeing entire neighborhoods and market squares from the peak of his friend’s blobby body.

“You did good down there, friend,” Copper said. “And I bet that little climb you did helped boost your stamina too.”

James rolled his eyes. “I don’t think baseball players would ever have to climb a landfill of lard during a game.” His lips curved into a warm smile. “Thanks for the practice. I feel a lot better now, both in terms of my skills and my mood.” He paused once more, looking seriously into the bird’s eyes. “Sometimes, I feel I don’t give you enough credit for how easily you can cheer me up. It really means a lot to me… Of course, you could have done that without stuffing yourself until you took up the entire field.”

Copper laughed. “Sure, but I wouldn’t have had as much fun. Although I probably weigh more than a cruise, I feel a heavy burden has lifted off my shoulders. I don’t have to worry anymore about paying bills or working or exercising. I can just laze around all day with zero responsibilities. Then again, I’ll still have to eat once in a while, and drinking is important too, but I’m sure you’ll help with those.”

James smiled as he dug a hand into his friend’s gut. “You bet, but no more of those donuts. We can’t have you busting out of the field.”

“Deal,” Copper replied. “I mean, I’m technically not responsible for any damages so far, other than a slightly bent gate, and I’d rather keep it that way. Now that I think about it, someone’s going to be pretty upset when they see a giant blue blob has consumed their playing field.” The two laughed at the thought, Copper’s body wobbling with each hearty chuckle. “Good thing that’s not you, right?”

After taking a second to reflect on it, James’s eyes widened. “Wait, I do play here! It must have slipped out of my mind.”

Copper, noticing his friend getting sweaty, tried to reassure him. “Don’t worry. I’m sure your game will be rescheduled or relocated.”

James shook his head. “Tomorrow’s the last day of the school’s semester, which means the fields close until January. It happens tomorrow or never.”

“Everything will be fine,” Copper replied, a wide smile spread across his face. “A field is nothing more than a bunch of white plates. I’m sure the game organizers can build a shabby one somewhere and direct everyone there. What else are they going to do, turn me into a living baseball field?”

~

Outfitting Copper as a living baseball field was much less a hassle than the team captains originally assumed. The holes where his arms rested spread apart a touch over a hundred feet, making them adequate positions for first and third base. Second base was squeezed between his butt cheeks, and home base fitted snugly in his large navel. The captains walked across the blobby field, finding the surface to be wet and hilly but far from unplayable. They realized that the increased altitude would make hitting home runs pathetically easy, but they counteracted that by purchasing a heavy, metal bat. With Copper fully dressed for his new job, the game began minutes later. The hard part, then, was getting the players to cooperate with their unique terrain.

The field was absolutely chaotic throughout all nine innings. The players wasted the first three slipping and sliding every few seconds across Copper’s sweaty flab. Copper’s frequent, unannounced rumblings threw another hurdle at the players, and they rarely failed to bring the players tumbling on their butts. When the players stood in place, their feet were swallowed under several inches of fat. When the players ran, their speed was cut in half by the need to hopscotch across the clingy skin. None of the players performed at their peak, nor were they motivated to do so. They were understandably irked with being forced to play atop a living being, especially one that was constantly wobbling and sweating.

The only exception was James. Having spent several hours with the enormous bird the day before, James was accustomed to particulars of the field. He rarely tripped, maneuvering across his friend with ease. As for Copper’s seemingly unpredictable quakes, all he had to do was look to his friend for a wink or nod as a head’s up. His batting was exceptional as well, and he constantly hit doubles and triples. The opposing team’s captain found his stellar performance fishy, but his own applauded him, considering it a sign of quickly adjusting to one’s environment.

News about the living, breathing baseball field soon spread around town. On a normal game, the bleachers would only be three rows full at most, but today they were completely filled. Still more furs gathered behind the gate in the hundreds, including notables like the local news crew. All of them watched intently, fascinated by the idea of a game being played on top of the biggest, fattest bird they’ve ever seen. The captains smiled and nodded to each other; no matter who wins or losses, the extra attention to their league was a victory for them both.

After a grueling hour of play, the game finally reached the bottom of the ninth inning. With two outs, bases loaded, and teams a point away, it was remarkably similar to yesterday’s game. At bat once again was James. He eyed the opposing pitcher, a jaguar instead of a tiger, but still not one to be messed with. With the eyes of hundreds on him and the scores neck to neck, he felt incredibly pressured and nervous. His forehead sweated and his arms twitched, but after a snap of the head, he clenched his hands tight. He couldn’t let the stress get to him now, not when he’s gotten so far. He dug his feet deep in his friend’s flesh and rolled his shoulders, prepared to give his final hit his all.

Grinning, the pitcher threw a fastball towards the bat. James watched the red-stripped sphere zoom towards him, and when it hovered over home plate, he struck it at the center of the bat’s tip with so much force it made a gong-like ring upon impact. With a racing heart, James titled his head with the rising of the ball. It soared high in the air, only reaching its peak when it flew past most of the outfield. James shook his head in disbelief as he saw it cross over the field’s gate, still a couple dozen feet in the air. It remained airborne for a few more seconds before landing at a far away parking lot.

The crowd roared with excitement upon witnessing the game-winning hit. James laughed excitedly as he smiled with gaped jaws, his heart nearly pounding out of his chest. After tossing the bat, he and his team mates ran around the bases for the sake of it. Copper was thrilled as well, celebrating by wobbling and hollering. The players gulped as they felt the flesh beneath them shake once again, and seconds later they fell onto their sweat-stained shorts. James chuckled as he sat up, shooting a smile to his careless friend.

As the crowd died down, James’s team decided to celebrate at the nearby pizzeria, and James told them he would be there in ten minutes. Soon enough, the entire field was deserted save for him and his bloated friend. The bat walked across his friend’s fat and sat next to his blubbery face. “How was your first game as a living baseball field?” he teased.

Copper laughed. “It was a unique experience, that’s for sure. I was impressed by how well you played. You outdid your other clumsy team mates by a landslide.” James smiled, not bothering to bring it was mostly due to his unfair advantage. “That’s enough time for me,” Copper said with a yawn. “Go out and celebrate with your team. I’ll be fine rocking about and gazing at the clouds.”

James smiled as he looked into the bird’s eyes. “Thanks, Cop.” He leaped down his friend’s belly in long strides, barely able to slow his acceleration as he neared the wooden stairway that acted as a replacement for the lard-blocked gate. He looked at his friend once more before running down the stairs and towards the parking lot as he reveled in his victory.