Things start off with a Bang
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The three squirrels chatted in the hallway at what they thought was a reasonable volume. By the time they reached the door of their apartment, they were talking excitedly back-and-forth loud enough to be heard between floors, with one particular voice rising above the others. While the two female voices giggled and swapped stories, the male voice stopped in front of the door.

“Hang on, I got it,” he rumbled, his voice deep, but unexpectedly soft. With the grinding sound of metal-key on metal-lock, the deadbolt clacked open and they pushed their way inside.
“Oh fuck yeth,” Daphodille mumbled excitedly as she pushed past Darwin into the apartment. Her hair cropped short from a recent haircut, she wore a dark button-up that covered most of her copper-red fur, a pair of loose jeans she could still move comfortably in, and her characteristic athletic toe-shoes over her wide squirrel paws. This was the closest thing to a 'nice' outfit she owned, or at least something that wasn't her usual athletic clothes or work uniform. Scurrying inside with her enormous tail bobbing weightlessly behind her, the athletic squirrel planted one foot on the thick coffee table and leapt nearly five feet in the air, turning in mid-air and falling back-first onto the thick, plush couch cushions with a mushroom cloud of dust.

“Gggaaaaaah,” She groaned, happily shifting up on the couch and sitting up to move her tail out of the way. “I love your fuckin' couch, you guyth!”
“You keep doing that, you're going to pop one of the cushions,” Darwin complained. A tall, fit, long-eared squirrel himself, he wore a simple polo and slacks which were more expensive than they appeared. His fur was a light brown, his tail not quite so overpoweringly large as Daph's, and his front teeth cropped short to not affect his speech. Without looking, he gripped the door with one of his broad hands and held it open for his petite wife, Georgia.
“She's too little to do that,” Georgia giggled, pushing the door closed behind her. Another squirrel, just a little shorter that Daph, she wore a flowing, pleated dress that went just below her knees with a small, waist-length shawl over her shoulders, both fashionably vintage. Unlike the muted, earthy colors of her husband and friend, her fur was a bright, golden blonde color that matched perfectly with her blue eyes to give her an exotic, almost pure appearance.

“You remember in middle thchool when I tried to climb up the thtorm drain?” Daph asked, her friends long having grown accustomed to her heavy lisp. She turned to Darwin and explained, “It broke off the roof when I wath halfway up and I fell, like, twenty fuckin' feet to the ground.”
“It was more like ten feet, Daph,” Georgia rolled her eyes, taking off her shawl and laying it across a chair. “And onto grass.”
“Whatever, thtill,” Daph shrugged. “I rolled when I hit the ground and didn't break a bone or nothin'. It was rad.”
“And then you got detention for a month and your mom had to pay for the repairs,” Georgia added, raising an eyebrow. Daph's grin faded slightly and she cleared her throat.
“Yeah...that wathn't tho funny...”
“None of this is making me very confident about letting you inside, Daphodille,” Darwin snarked, standing in the middle of the room with his hands in his pockets.
“What do you think I am, a fuckin' tornado?” Daph asked, incredulously. “Comin to your apartment ith like a vacation, like I'm thtaying in a hotel.”

“Ok sure, but we're the maids that have to pick up after you,” Darwin said. Daph sat up and raised an eyebrow at him.
“Yeah, I know, that'th why I try not to fuck anything up.” Daph looked Darwin up and down and gestured to him. “The fuck are you doin'? Thit down, you're makin me nervouth.”
“Sitting for too long after eating just makes me sleepy,” Dawin shrugged, his tail bobbing behind him.
“Well, you're our guest, anyway,” Georgia smiled at Daph. “Just...please don't break anything.”
“Why do you guyth think I'm gonna fuck everything up!?” Daph shouted, flopping back onto the couch.
“Because we've seen your apartment,” Darwin said, flatly.
“But that'th my thtuff. That'th different.” Daph sighed, smacking her tongue against the back of her oversized teeth. “You got any peanutth or thomething? Walnuts? I'll kill a motherfucker for thome walnuts right now.”
“Didn't we just eat?” Darwin asked. “Or was that just me?”

“No no, dude, don't get me wrong,” Daph said. “That wath, like the betht fuckin' place I've ever eaten at in my whole fuckin' life. It just...there jutht wathn't all that much yknow? I almotht wanted to order dessert after it.”
“Why didn't you?” Georgia asked. Daph glanced at her, mouth hanging open in shock.
“Georgia, did you thee that menu? A cup of chocolate fuckin' milk woulda probably cotht me eighteen buckth and half a finger. I wathn't gonna order dessert.”
“You could have. It was our treat, remember?” Georgia grinned, happily.
“You tryin' to 'wine and dine' me?” Daph said. She glanced at Darwin and thumbed toward Georgia. “Were you watchin’ her? Did she put thomethin’ in my drink?”

“I wasn't exactly paying attention,” Darwin shrugged.
“Well, if I wake up in the bathtub without a kidney,” Daph pointed to Georgia. “I'm callin the copth. I don't give a fuck if you were a girl thcout or not.”
“I don't think you'll have that to worry about,” Georgia giggled.
“Well, why fuckin' not?” Daph shouted, feigning exaggerated anger to make her friend laugh. “I got good kidneyth. You want 'em?”
“Stop, stop,” Georgia said, her hand over her mouth, straining not to go into a fit of giggles.
“Please don't give my wife a heart attack, Daphodille,” Darwin said.
“Aw c'mon, who doethn't wanna literally die of laughter?” Daph glanced around the room, sitting up and glancing in the corners. “Didn't you have a mini-bar latht time I wath here?”

“We moved all that to the kitchen,” Darwin said, crossing around the couch. “We didn't entertain enough to get much use out of it.”
“I'll thay,” Daph said, smirking. “I ain't been over here in like a year and a half.”
“We've been busy,” Georgia explained.
“Oh, I know,” Daph said knowingly, winking at Georgia. She blushed beneath her fur and giggled, her tail flapping.
“We've just been working a lot,” Darwin said, stepping into the open-door kitchen. “You want a beer? We've got a few.”
“Too many calorieth,” Daph waved dismissively. “Tho...what you been workin' so hard on thith past year?” She peeked her head over the couch and raised an eyebrow at Darwin.
“Oh, you know,” he leaned against the doorway and opened a beer for himself, taking a swing at adding, “'Stuff.'”
“Uh-huh,” Daph smirked, raising both eyebrows. “Thtuff.” She shook her head and made a series of disapproving tch sounds with her teeth. “You heteros and your secretth.”
“Who are you calling hetero?” Georgia said, throwing a pillow at Daph and standing up to join her husband in the kitchen.
“And what's wrong with being hetero?” Darwin said, raising an eyebrow. Georgia walked up next to him and sighed, putting a hand on his chest and shaking her head.
“Poor straights,” she teased, looking back at Daph.

“They jutht never learn,” Daph agreed, shaking her head in unison with Georgia. Darwin glanced between the two confusedly, sighing while he took a swig of his drink. Georgia giggled again, hopping up in the air to kiss her tall husband before going into the kitchen.
“Do you want a drink, Daph?”
“Whatcha got?” Daph leaned back on the couch, but then quickly sat up again. “Oh! You got any nice vodka?”
“Is Absolut nice?” Georgia asked.
“Did it cotht more than ten buckth?”
“I think so.”
“Then it'th nice.” Daph gasped, suddenly realizing what she wanted. “You got any orange juice? Make me a thcrewdriver!”
“No but...we've got lemonade.”
“Fuck...okay, that'th good enough,” Daph said, leaning back. “We can call it...a flathead or thomething.”
“Can do!” Georgia said happily, taking the bottles out of the fridge.

Daph sprawled out on the couch, letting her muscles relax. She'd made sure to go to the gym early that day as she probably wouldn't be up for it the next morning. With a good workout, a good shower, and good friends to visit for the first time in what felt like ages, she was more content than she had been in months. The monotony of her job was starting to weigh down on her, and even staying fit was starting to feel like a boring routine. She still made regular meetings with her parkour groups, but a lot of them were more interested in training and gym work than actual in-city free running, and even that wasn't much fun to do by herself. Even at age 24, it seemed like her life was starting to slow down, which was something she never ever expected to happen before she hit thirty. Seeing Georgia and her husband again, after being apart for so long, was just the kind of stimulus she needed. Daph hoped she wasn't being too overwhelming for them, but it was hard not to get excited.

Sighing, she fell into a relaxed, thoughtless peace on her friends' couch, one leg dangling over the side with her tail bobbling lazily on the floor. But with those few moments of quiet came the feeling she'd been trying to repress the entire night. A hot, burning sensation that seemed to flush under her body, like she was smoldering under her fur and skin. She sighed, trying to push the uncomfortable feeling away. She'd heard about medication to lessen the effect of her 'time of the month,' but she naturally couldn't afford it. She usually never went out around that time, choosing to stay home and deal with her discomfort in her own way, but she wasn't about to reject an invitation from her best friend and her husband. So far, she'd been successful in distracting herself and powering through her biological needs.

Daph paused, discovering that her hand wasn't where she left it a moment ago. Instead, it laid across the middle of her jeans, between her legs, fingers around her zipper and pulled halfway down. She shook her head, slapped her face a couple times to get a grip, then zipped them back up. As much as she hated it, she might be forced to call their night off earlier than she planned.

Meanwhile, in the kitchen, Darwin walked up to his wife and gripped her shoulders affectionately, kissing the top of her head while she poured the drinks.
“I think this one's a little too strong,” Georgia said, setting aside a small glass. “You want it?”
“I'm fine with this,” Darwin responded, tapping his beer on the counter. “Give it to Daph.”
“She actually doesn't drink much, believe it or not,” Georgia explained. “She likes it mostly for taste.”
Darwin picked up the extra drink, swirling it around and staring into it, lost in thought.
“Are you sure about this?” he asked.
“You mean 'Are you sure about her,'” Georgia said, turning to look coldly at Darwin. “Right?”
“I just...I...” He rubbed the tip of one of his ears, stalling. As headstrong as Darwin was, he usually found himself speechless once his wife's resolve was set on something. “...I'm just not sure.”

“You don't know her like I do,” Georgia said. She sighed, her expression softening as she took Darwin's hand and brought it to her face. “I know, it's strange, but I really think she's the best chance we'll have.”
“But are you sure,” Darwin asked, whispering. “She's not our only option, you know.”
“I know she's not,” Georgia said, steely-eyed. “But she's the only one I trust.”

Shooting Darwin a determined glance, she picked up two of the three glasses, leaving the strongest drink on the counter, and walked back into the living room, her tail swaying confidently. Darwin sighed, picked up the mix drink and gulped back nearly half of it in a single swallow. He stalled for time in the kitchen, knowing Georgia wouldn't start the conversation without him. Searching around the cabinets, he found a semi-old bag of cashews that he hadn’t felt like throwing away. Daph would probably like them. He dropped it on the counter, next to both his drinks, and stared at the point between them, tapping his foot on the tile floor. Darwin sighed one last time, his stubborn nature finally deciding to defer to his wife's thinking, but not without help from the rest of the mix drink, sour and bitter in its strength.

Walking back into the living room, beer in hand, Darwin glanced over the couch, finding Georgia and Daph chatting happily and nonchalantly about Georgia's new work phone.
“And it comes with all these little programs and applications I can use. They won't let me use any of the paid stuff of course, but I can still customize it and everything, and a lot of the most useful stuff is free, anyway.” Georgia glanced up to her husband standing over the back of the couch and smiled. Daph leaned her head backward to get an upside-down look at Darwin.
“Did you know they gave her a nicer cell phone than I got for free?” She asked, incredulously pointing at the phone.
“I can only use it when I'm on call, though,” Georgia said, dropping it back into her purse. “But I still keep it with me for emergencies.”
“At leatht it's better than when you worked in the ER, right?” Daph nodded. “Whenever we thaw you at home, you were athleep.”

“It was really hard work,” Georgia nodded. “I'm glad I did it, I learned a lot, but I don't want to go back to that. Too much...” She shuddered. “...too much to see...”
“I thtill got thith little fucker,” Daph said, digging into her pocket to pull out a small, black flip phone that looked like an exotic beetle in the apartment's lamp-light. “I like it, though! It doethn't do a lot of fancy shit like yours, but it getth the job done pretty well. Pluth, if I get mad, I can just thnap on a motherfucker.” She demonstrated by thumbing open the lid and slamming it back down with the rest of her fingers, making a loud plastic clack.
“Technology is moving so fast that in a couple years, Georgia's phone will probably be even cheaper than yours,” Darwin added, stepping around the couch and pulling in a far away chair.
“Oh no no no,” Georgia shook her head. She hopped up and sat on the couch next to Daph, curling her legs beneath her and pointing to her empty seat. “Sit there, sit there.”

Darwin shrugged and crossed the room, settling quietly in the chair with his tail draped over the armrest.
“Mmmm,” Daph mumbled beneath a sip of her drink. “I dunno if, like, the vodka ith really fuckin' good, or if I jutht want thome lemonade, yknow?” She laughed, then took another sip and set it on the coffee table. Darwin leaned in for it, but before he could reach, Georgia had already pulled a coaster out from the side table and slipped it beneath the glass.

“...Hey, Daphodille,” Georgia said, after pausing for a moment.
“Oh shit,” Daph suddenly said, pointing to the bag of cashews Darwin had set beneath the chair. “You gonna eat thothe?”
“Help yourself,” Darwin nodded, tossing the bag to Daph, who only barely caught it out of the air with two fingers.
“I don't get thethe a lot, but I fuckin' love em,” she said, cracking open one of the nuts and slipping the shell into her pocket. It crunched solidly between her teeth, making a loud crack that echoed around the tall-ceiling room. She pushed off one of her toe shoes and brought her leg up onto the couch beside her. “Thorry, Georgia, you were thaying?”
“Okay...Okay, so...” Georgia continued, but her momentum had been interrupted and she had to rebuild her train of thought. “So...Daph, we really wanted to see you and, like, it's been really great that you're here and I've missed you a bunch.”

“Awwww, you're gonna give me a heart attack, dude,” Daph said, extending her leg to lay her paw across Georgia's thigh. She winked.
“But that isn't the only reason we wanted to invite you here,” Darwin chimed in, nodding. Daph's cheeky smile faded into anxious curiosity.
“Well...fuck,” she said. “I ain't ever been told that when it wath good newth.”
“Well it's...not...bad but it's...um...complicated,” Georgia said, fighting to get the words right. She absentmindedly took Daph's paw into her hands and started to stretch and massage her toes, a practice they had got into when Georgia was working toward her physical therapy degree and Daph needed a more effective way to relax her muscles after exercising.
“Thometimes, that'th even worse,” Daph said, nevertheless sighing comfortably as Georgia worked the tension out of her paws.
“Well it's...Daphodille,” Georgia said, stopping her massage. “… Yknow how we've been trying to...trying to have a baby?”
“Huh,” Daph chuckled. “'Do I know?' I make it my fuckin' buthiness to know every time you're getting it on, dude. You been tryin’ for a baby for almotht two...” Daph's sentence slowly halted as she stared at Georgia, finally putting what she thought was two and two together. She gasped, pulling her feet in and staring open-mouthed at Georgia. “Did it happen? Did it fuckin'' happen!? Are you-”

“No, no no no no, Daph,” Georgia said, holding out her hands. “I'm not...It's...” Georgia brushed some hair out of her face and folded her arms, her tail drooping slightly. “It's...kinda the opposite of that.”
“Kinda the oppothite?” Daph repeated, confused. “I don't get it. You're not...You...you can't....” Daph's face fell, her mouth dropping open in shock. “Oh...Oh my god, Georgia.” She shuffled across the couch and pulled her friend into a strong hug, leaving her tail laying against the couch. “I thwear to god...I didn't know, I really didn't...Oh god, I'm tho thorry.” Georgia wrapped her arms around Daph and squeezed, patting her on the back gently. Daph gently rocked them back and forth, only stopping once Georgia pulled away. She smiled sadly, with the shadow of tears in her eyes, and patted Daph on the shoulder.

“It's okay,” she said, blinking away the water in her vision. “We've known for a while...but thank you, Daph.”
“What?” Daph responded, looking hurt. “What'th 'a while?' And you didn't tell me before?” Before she continued, she stopped herself, closing her eyes and sighing to regain composure. “...Thorry. I'm glad you're okay but...I would have liked to have known.”
“We haven't told anybody else,” Georgia said, glancing at Darwin, who nodded solemnly. “We were...counting our options.”
“Do you know why?” Daph asked. “...Thorry, you don't gotta thay if you don't...want to...” She added, quietly.
“It's...” Georgia sighed, looking away. “It's a few things...I've always had irregular periods and...heats...so it probably has a lot to do with that. And...yknow, some of...SPS...”

“Fuck,” Daph sighed, shaking her head. “I wath afraid of that.” SPS, or sciuridae prenatal stress disorder, was a phenomenon among some squirrels living in populated areas. Because they were biologically better suited for forests and natural settings, much of the squirrel population in New York City suffered from anxiety disorders. This was most dangerous in women, where stress often provided difficulties in conception and sometimes even miscarriage.
“So was I...” Georgia sighed. “I guess that's why I'm an only child.”
“They...they got treatmentth, right?”
“We thought about that,” Georgia said, glancing to Darwin. “It's mostly just medications and treatments for the anxiety. SPS is mostly a physical issue.”
“Right, right...I get it,” Daph nodded. “Tho...can you like...ith there anything...can you get like a thurgery or thomething like that?”
“No, not really,” Georgia shook her head. “Really, along with my gland problems and polycystic ovaries...I...I doubt there's any chance of me ever getting pregnant.”

The room fell into silence, Daph looking hopelessly between Georgia and Darwin, who both stared at the floor, trying not to relive their pain. Daph's mouth hung open, sometimes closing when she swallowed, and constantly grabbing for something to say.
“Ok...” Daph said, breaking the unpleasant atmosphere and tapping her paw on the ground next to the couch. “What about...like...can you adopt?” She shrugged.
“We've looked into that,” Darwin said, speaking up. “We've gone to agencies and...they didn't think we...”
“We were rejected,” Georgia said, flatly.
“You're fuckin' kidding,” Daph said, throwing her arms in the air. “You guyth would be mother fuckin'g parentth of the goddamn year! What the fuck were they thinking!?”
“We just work too much,” Darwin shrugged. “They didn't think our home life was suited to raising a child, especially from infancy.”
“We're trying to set aside more time,” Georgia nodded to Darwin. “Trying not to work so much at home, leaving work at work, things like that.” Georgia rubbed her forearm, looking away with more words on the tip of her tongue. “...To tell the truth, I didn't like the idea of adoption, even of a baby. It just...they'd be a stranger. They'd be someone else's.”

“Well...I mean...Georgia...” Daph swallowed, shaking her head. “...I think that'th...just going to be something you have to live with, yknow?”
“That's what I thought,” Georgia nodded, looking up at Darwin and nodding. “Then we thought about surrogacy.”
“What, like, thomebody elthe carrieth the baby?” Daph said, raising an eyebrow. She shook her head. “Ithn't that the thame thing?”

“It would be,” Georgia said, taking Daph's hand in her own and smiling softly, “...if the surrogate were a stranger.”

“…Huh?” Daph blinked, looking down at Georgia's hands and glancing over to Darwin. “...What, like…they won't be? You know em?” She snapped her head back to Georgia surprised. “Do I know em?”

“Yes...you do,” Georgia said dreamily, squeezing Daph's hands.

“...Who?”

Georgia sighed and glanced at her husband with a little giggle. Darwin sighed and pinched his brow.
“You, Daphodille,” he said. “We're talking about you.”
“You're talkin-” Daph blinked before understanding slapped her in the face and her eyes went wide with shock again. “Y-You...you want me to...ME?” She glanced at Georgia, spluttering. “ME?”

“Daphodille,” Georgia said softly. “...Would you carry our baby?”
“Buh...I...duh...” Daph shook her head, her mind spinning. “You're talkin about me right?” She hopped to her feet, glancing between the two. “Me,” she said, rolling back her sleeve and flexing one of her wiry, powerful muscles, “being all,” she put two fingers on her sternum and mimed a wide, round circle over her stomach, stopping at her waist. “Am I getting thith right?”

“Pretty much,” Georgia giggled. Daph flopped back down, still gazing at the two of them in shock. She looked at Georgia and tapped her chest with a finger.
“But...like...why me?” Daph asked.
“Well,” Georgia began. “The way I see it...you're my best and oldest friend.” She took hold of Daph's hand again and squeezed it. “If I can't have my own baby...then I'd be okay with raising yours.”
“Plus, you have three older brothers,” Darwin added. “And you've lived in New York your entire life. We're pretty sure SPS doesn't run in your family.”

Daph looked between the two, her mouth still hanging open. She brought her free hand to her stomach, poking her abs softly with a finger, imagining an entire other person growing behind them. But as she stared at the coffee table, her expression softened, her mouth closed, and a thoughtful look came to her eye. She popped another cashew in her mouth and chewed it slowly, tapping her foot on the ground as a quiet serenity filled her thoughts.
“You don't have to come up with an answer right now...” Georgia said, reassuringly. “And...and you don't even have to say yes if you don't want to! Just take a few days to think about it and-”

“Nah, I'm good,” Daph suddenly said, nodding and chewing on the cashew. “I'll do it, thure.”
Georgia stopped gripping Daph's hand, a silent moment stalling between her and her husband. They glanced at one another, as if to confirm that, indeed, a life-changing decision had been made in the span of five seconds.
“Wh-What...um...Daph, you can...are you sure?” Georgia spluttered, raising her eyebrows.
“Yeah, thure,” Daph shrugged, popping open two more nuts and throwing them in her mouth. “Why not?”
“...Just like that?”
“I mean...yeah?” Daph shrugged. “What, you fuckin' athked me, didn't you?”
“Well...we did, but we didn't expect you to agree...so fast.”
“Daphodille, you can take a few days,” Darwin added, leaning forward. “There's not any kind of rush, you can think about this. It's a big decision.”

“I know,” Daph said, standing up from the couch. “And I did think about it. Or like, I didn't need to think about it.” She un-tucked her shirt and glanced at Georgia, shrugging. “'Cause it'th for you.” She glanced between the two of them and shrugged again as she began to unbutton her shirt from the bottom. “Tho yeah. Fuck it. Let'th have a baby. I don't got much elthe goin on lately.”

“You're serious...” Georgia breathed. As she inhaled, an enormous, blossoming grin spread over her face and she started to shake in excitement. Happy tears were just seconds from spilling from her eyes all over her golden fur. “Daph...Daph, I don't know...if you know how much this means to us...You're the...Oh my God, Daphodille, you're the best friend I've ever...” Georgia paused, her elation falling away into confusion. “...Daph, what are you doing?”

“What?” Daph said, taking off her shirt and throwing it over the couch. She gripped her tank-top undershirt and pulled it over her head in one motion, revealing her muscular body barely hidden by her copper fur. She threw it aside and began to work on unclipping her bra. It was one of the few times she wore something other than her normal sports bras, but it was also one of the few times she went out to a nice restaurant.

“Daphodille, what the hell are you doing?” Darwin nearly shouted in alarm. Daph glanced between the couple, her eyebrows raised as if they were the crazy ones. She dropped her arms from her bra clip and held them out, her tail twitching in agitation.
“What?” She said, defensively, pointing to the two of them. “I thought we were gonna go make a baby or thomething!”

“What, now?” Darwin yelled.
“Yeah, now!” Daph nodded. “The fuck did you invite me over for?”
“To ask you in person!” Darwin shouted.
“What, that'th it?” Daph said, incredulously. “You coulda jutht come over to my place for that! The fuck wath the dinner for? If you're gonna wine and dine me, you might ath well fuck me after it!” Daph sighed and shook her head and kicked off her remaining shoe. She vaulted over the couch in nothing but her jeans and padded across the hardwood floor to the bedroom. She pushed open the door and glanced inside, turning and gesturing skeptically.

“The fuck you clean the bedroom for if you weren't gonna fuck me in it?”
“We have a housekeeper that comes on Fridays,” Georgia piped in. Darwin was too busy exhaustively burying his face in his hands. Daph raised her eyebrows and glanced into the bedroom again.
“Well...fuck,” She said. “...They do a good job.” Daph shook her head and pointed between the couple. “But...You mean that you two weren't even gonna fuck me tonight? Not even for thith?”

“We were going to go to the doctor. Next week!”
“Oh pfft,” Daph blew a raspberry and waved her arm. “Fuck that. Let'th jutht have a three-way inthtead. Get it done right here and now, yknow? It'th cheaper.”
“I mean...” Darwin sat up and shook his head. “We haven't done this since we were in college, Daph...”
“Then why not bring it back!?” Daph shouted cheerily. “It'th for a good cauthe, right?” She looked for Georgia to back her up. “Right?”

“I'm not against it,” Georgia shrugged. “...Though it really is up to you, honey. You don't have to if you don't want to.”
“You know you want to...” Daph mock-whispered from across the room. “It'th been in the air all night...”
“I...I don't know...” Darwin threw his hands up. “...Right now? Really?”
“Wait,” Daph said, pointing and tapping her foot. “...You really don't know? What time of year it ith?”
“I don't know...” Darwin shrugged. “March?”
“Nuh-uh,” Daph wagged her finger, grinning. “Hey, Georgia,” she added winking to her friend. “It'th the latht week of March...”

“...Oh...Ohhhhh,” Georgia gasped before collapsing into a giggle fit, nearly rolling off the couch onto the floor. When she regained her ability to speak again, she looked over at Darwin and said, “Daph's in her heat cycle this week.”
Darwin swallowed, a lump forming both in his throat and in his pants.
“I...” he began to say before clearing his throat. “...I did not know that.”
“But part of you diiiiid,” Daph grinned, pointing at Darwin's waist. He cleared his throat again and crossed his legs in his seat, looking away and flipping his tail anxiously.
“It's okay, honey,” Georgia said, leaning across the coffee table to put a hand on his knee. “You just didn't know, don't be embarrassed.”

“Ok, ok, look,” Daph sighed, putting her hands on her hips. “We can do thith your way. I can get a cab and go home and rub one out by mythelf. Then, next week, we can go to the doctor and get me knocked up all fuckin' fancy like.” She took her hands off her hips and pointed toward the bedroom. “Or, you can think about high thchool biology and remember that conception ith about four timeth more likely when the female ith on her heat cycle. Then we can all three of us go into the bedroom and get thith done right now, tonight, and have a great fuckin' time while we do it.” Daph shrugged, putting her hands back on her hips. “I'm leavin thith all up to you, man. But if you need me, I'm gonna be hanging out in your bedroom, with my pantth on your floor, waiting to decide if I wanna take a shower or not with your fancy fuckin' detachable shower-head.” Daph did a little skip-dance on her agile feet and strode through the bedroom door, followed shortly by her pink bra flying out of it and sliding across the floor.

“She's got a point,” Georgia shrugged. “But she's right. Only if you want to.” She stood up and stretched, very purposefully raising her tail and dragging it beneath Darwin's chin as she glanced over her shoulder with half-lidded eyes. “I think I'm going to take a shower first...just to get a little warmed up.” She winked, then sauntered slowly into the bedroom.

Darwin sat locked in his chair, his crossed legs growing more uncomfortable by the second. His hands gripped the armrest like he was going to float away from it. He tried to think, but was distracted by the high-pitched female laughter coming from the bedroom. It died down, and he tried to think, but was distracted by an uncomfortable twinge between his legs. He tried to think, but was distracted by the shower turning on in the other room. Then, after all the distractions, Darwin decided that maybe this wasn't the time for thinking, after all.

“Oh fuck it,” he sighed, standing up and marching toward the bedroom, tearing off his expensive shirt and throwing it to the floor.
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Index