Healing


Pop!

Reflexively, Asuka jerked away as the air conditioner gave kickback and rattled in his face. Backing mistrustfully away with an amused grimace, he looked over to his daughter, seated lengthwise on the couch with a thick paperback book resting open on her knees.

“You guys kind’ve did a number on this one. I’ll pick you up a new one in the morning, so we can get it installed before it gets terribly hot again.” Glancing around, he raised an eyebrow. “Clearly, Kana gets to miss out on all this fun?”

“Yeah, he’s spending a weekend with that… Boy? Miyu?” With an aggrieved sigh, Hana slid down, slumping with her head back until her head rested on the arm. “I’m the only one here. Lucky me.”

Thoughtfully, Asuka twirled a nearby desk fan around to face her.

“At least it is almost sundown, but I do understand what you mean. I’ll tell you what; I’ve got no real plans for this evening. I can spend it here with you, if you would like. A father/daughter sleepover. How does that sound?”

“You really want to suffer in the heat with me?”

“Sure. One night without central air won’t be the worst thing I’ve ever toughed out. Besides, at the very least, I can provide a distraction. You are one of my favorite people to talk to, after all.”

A tiny smile touched Hana’s face as she shuffled her feet on the couch.

“Thank you, daddy. It honestly means… Quite a lot to me to hear you say that.” Awkwardly, she rubbed the back of her neck as her father pulled the faulty air conditioning unit out of the window, closing it in its wake. “I know… Social norms are not my strongest feature.”

Placing the dead machine in a corner by the apartment door, Asuka laughed.

“You’re unique, Hana. And true and honest to yourself. I enjoy our conversations, and I enjoy the time I get to spend with you. In fact, I regret all the time that I’ve missed out on with you.” Double checking the lock on the front door, he moved to take a seat only once satisfied that the apartment was secure. Taking a seat at the other end of the couch by her feet, Asuka folded his legs and turned to face her, rather like a youngster about to settle into gossip. “So, you have the floor. We can talk about anything you want. I’m all yours, dear.”

With half a nervous smile, Hana bit her lip thoughtfully.

“There… Is something I’ve wanted to ask you about. …If you’re sure it would be okay?”

Asuka’s smile was soft and understanding. Bowing his head, he splayed his hands welcomingly. “Of course. Any subject.”

Seeming more relaxed, Hana nodded, considering her words carefully.

“If I could, I was wondering if you would tell me about you and my mother. How you met, things like that? The two of you just sounded like you were… So different. So very, very different. It’s made me wonder.”

Asuka let out a soft laugh. The humor of it slipped into the corners of his eyes and the lightness within them.

“Fair enough. At heart, we were certainly, undoubtedly, total opposites. You see, meeting your mother was actually a total accident. I had gone on a trip outside of Japan without My Supreme Leader Uotani’s permission. This was, of course, while I was still working for the Yakuza, and Uotani didn’t care to find out about my… Sabbatical through a note that I had left on his doorstep on my way to the airport. And if you’ve heard anything about Uotani, you’ve probably heard how well he takes to being unable to control people under his employ. So, thinking I needed some discipline, he had these henchmen of his waiting for me at the airport when I landed. Obviously, the intention was less than friendly, so I ran off into the terminal, trying to lose them. When that didn’t work, I grabbed a woman to use as a shield between myself and them. I can’t say that anything in particular made me pick the person that I did; she was small, she was nearby, and when I grabbed her, she wasn’t afraid. With some strange man’s arm around her neck, holding her between himself and a bunch of tattooed, armed thugs, and she showed no fear. She looked bored. And I guess that intrigued me.”

Asuka shifted and fished his wallet from his pocket. Beckoning Hana closer, he flipped to a photo at the back, one of an Asuka who was twenty years younger. A small, sly smile curled his lips, reflecting coolly in dark eyes with his arms settled around a smaller, slim woman with black hair pulled neatly back in a ponytail, eyes such a pale, luminous blue they were almost silver. Her smile was awkward, as though she wasn’t used to wearing one, but it also seemed more openly happy.

“I’ve had three photos of your mother. Ryu and Kana have the other two, this one I think should be yours. I don’t need it anymore, I’ve moved on with my life. Holding onto it does nothing for me, but I thought it may be a nice thing for you to have.”

As Asuka took the photo from the plastic sleeve, Hana hesitantly reached for it. Running her finger down the side of the paper, Hana considered quietly for a moment before turning her gaze up to her father, her voice slightly halting.

“If you don’t need it… It’s not me to hold onto the past. It’s a really nice thought! Don’t get me wrong. I just… Never knew her, and having this isn’t going to change that. I’m more interested in getting to know and building a relationship with you. Not a woman that I’ll never have that chance with.”

Handing the photo back to Asuka, Hana rubbed her arm shyly.

“Would you want to… Rip it up together? I don’t mean it as any sort of insult, I just… Don’t think you should have to carry around so much of your past. We’re your family now, and all we want is you. Here, and present, with all of us.”

Looking down at the picture, Asuka considered that for a long, quiet moment. Then, lifting his head and the picture, Asuka smiled warmly.

“Together?”

Offering the photo to Hana, Asuka took it by one corner, and Hana took the opposite one.

“In tribute to building the bonds of a father and daughter.”

Hana smiled. “Amen to that. Thank you, daddy.”

Asuka returned her smile, pulling down his corner of the photo as he saw Hana’s grip tighten. She may be grown now, but the person sitting across from him at this moment was, in his eyes, still a little girl in her pajamas. And she had that same kind of effect on his heart.

Hana would never be without a father again.

“One, two, and… Three.”

On three, each hand went its separate way, tearing the picture in half.

Throwing the Ren half of the photo in the nearby trash can, Asuka had to admit that his heart did indeed feel lighter. The other half of the picture, that Hana held, the happy version of himself from twenty some odd years before, he inclined his head to.

“That you can keep, if you want. We’ll have to take a few new ones. Together.” Looking down at the picture, Hana smiled. “I want you to have something to hold, physically, to keep in your heart that you will never be alone again. You have a family, and we love you. We always will.” Leaning forward, Asuka wrapped an arm around her slim shoulders and squeezed her in a hug, bowing his head to rest his forehead against her temple. “I always will.”