This is yet another piece that I constructed like a word-collage from odd fragments on my scratch pads. As I’ve said in the introductions to several similar pieces in this particular genre, I occasionally get odd ideas, random memories, or hear strange things that people say, either in person, or in the media, and if I can’t immediately think of a place, or way in which to use them, I will write them on one of several scratch pads that I keep for that very purpose.

Occasionally I will go back and retrieve something, if I find a place, where it’s useful, but more often, I eventually find myself stringing a number of the odd (but interesting) ones together into poetaster collages.

One of the biggest influences in this piece is an old piece of folk wisdom that there are a few words in the English Language, for which no perfect rhyme exists. One of these is the word ‘silver’, and the other, more famous case, is ‘orange’. Indeed ‘Rhymes With Orange’ became the name of an alternative rock band out of Vancouver, who put out their first album in 1992, and also of a comic strip of the same name (but unrelated to the band, or their music), which first appeared in 1995.

There are a number of other music and pop culture references, which I think most people will be able to get, as well as a reference to the infamous quack-medicine remedy of taking colloidal silver, which has the unfortunate side-effect of turning people’s skin a very, very bizarre shade of bluish-grey (a condition known as argyria). One of the most (in)famous recent cases of argyria was exhibited by Stan Jones, who ran (unsuccessfully), as a Libertarian Party candidate for the United States Senate in 2002 and 2006, and (likewise unsuccessfully) for Governor of Montana in 2000 and 2004. Unfortunately for Mr. Jones, the media seemed far more interested in discussing the fact that he looked like a Smurf, than they were in the particulars of his campaign.

Another influence comes from an ex-friend/former roommate I used to have in my late teens and early twenties (who ceased to be a friend after he ripped me off—I’m sure most folks know how that goes), who had a taste for Kool-Aid (and don’t bother with the Jim Jones jokes—Jones and his followers actually used Flavor-Aid). Anyway, this individual used to like to keep several Kool-Aid flavours constantly on hand, which he would mix and store in one litre plastic jugs in the fridge, which he lined up side by side. He gave each flavour a whimsical, alliterative name, which he wrote on each respective jug with a sharpie. The four jugs he always had on hand were as follows: Blue Bat Barf, Red Rat Ralph, Purple Platypus Piss, and Orange Octopus Orgasms.

He was nothing if not creative. Unfortunately he turned out to be a bit too creative, when it came to stealing my money and possessions, but that’s an entirely different rant, altogether...